Sunday. 7.2.06 11:09 pm
I'm watching Mulan right now, but since I've seen it so many damn times I can write and watch it at the same time and not have it matter. Today I'm actually glad that I went in to work cuz it was busy and I ended up getting a few hours that I wasn't planning on getting. This also means that I will be able to go home early on Thursday. I just have to get prep done. Well maybe I can go home early on Wednesday like I planned originally and this way I'll have more time to finish shit on Thursday. Anywho I was thinking about Joey this morning. I was also thinking about Dana. I don't know why. They were just both on my mind. I wonder when the next time I'll see Dana is. I hope its soon. But I doubt it. I have to call Katie and make sure that she'll be able to hang out this weekend. And I have to see about going up to the Tucson Mall. I just know that I have to think of something to get her to go up there. Maybe if I fill her tank. Maybe that would get her to agree to go up there. And if we're gonna be going out early like she wants to there shouldn't be too much of a problem. Ugh. Why dod I have to like someone that I can't have. Just like David .. well sorta. I liked David in a different way since there had been something there. With Dana there's nothing. It'd be nice to start something that could go somewhere, but how is beyond me. I know that I keep writing the same shit over and over again only in different ways but its what's on my mind. Grrr. Why do I have to be so much younger than him? Or why does he have to be so much older than me? Why does he have to live so damn far away? And why is there no way to contact him aside from going to his job? Why? That's one of the biggest questions ever. You can ask that question to anything at all and almost never get a reasonable answer. Alright I have no idea what else to write except that I want Dana. That's it. So I'm done now.
Sunday. 7.2.06 1:03 am
I had today off, but it started out shitty again. My phone woke me up around quarter after 1 in the afternoon. It was Tiffany from work asking me if I could have tomorrow off and work Thursday instead. I had no problem with that, but I wanted to know why. I heard Erin in the background say that it was so that she could have the day off. I figured it was so that she wouldn't have to see me tomorrow. When I ended the phone call I saw that I had a message. I listened to the message; it was Erin bitching me out for shitty dough. That just triggered something in me so I got up, got dressed and went up there so that I could talk to her. I did what Joe suggested. I told her that even if she didn't say anything back, that if she could just listen to me I'd appreciate it. So we went into the office and talked. We ended up being okay again. She told me that she really did want me to work for her on Thursday so that she could have a day off this week since yesterday was supposed to be it. I hung out up there for a little bit, laughed and joked with Brandon, Erin, Tiffany and Lance. After a while I left cuz I had to go to the store cuz I had no food in my apt. I finally got some food in my apt but its not really healthy. Oh, just as Brandon was leaving I told him that Joey told Dana that I like him and Brandon wanted to know what he should do. I said I didn't care so he told me that he'd have Dana call me. Now I'm not sure how that was going to work since they didn't have my number and Dana doesn't have a phone. But Brandon said he'd figure out a way. I was happy about that, but I knew that it wasn't going to happen. I haven't gotten a phone call yet and I doubt if I will. That would be so awsome if I did though. It'd make my day. Anywho, I'm going in to work tomorrow (even though I'm off) for a couple hours so that David can come in at 2. Now Erin can drive and they have Tiffany and Trevor there tomorrow, but if Erin has to take a delivery there won't be anyone in the store to pour beer. So I'm going up there at noon and I'll hang out till 2 just in case I have to pour beer while Erin is out of the store. Uhm.. oh, Joey said that the next time he went up to the new store to just go up there he would take me. I'm looking forward to it. I know the general area that its going to be in, I've just never been there. I want to go and I want to go with Joey just cuz. There's really no reason why. I actually want to go to Northside more than I want to go to the new store, but I know that going to the new store is more of a possibility. I might be able to convince Katie to go up there for like gas money. I'd probably ask if we could go to Tucson Mall and while we're up there see if we could stop at Northside for some food. That might actually work. I'll see if she's up to it when we go to see Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. This way I could see Dana while he was working. And I could introduce him to Katie. Alright I'm out of shit to say so I'll write later.
11 years... RIP
Saturday. 7.1.06 4:46 am
Well as of today its been 11 years since my father passed away. It sucked ass today at work. I'm actually glad that I was at work and not at home because I could at least try and keep my mind occupied. It didn't work too well. I was able to talk to Joey about it so after that I felt a little better, but not much. I'm not mad at Joey anymore; it was pointless to stay mad at him. Anywho, when Gary came in I found out that Erin was super pissed at me for not staying last night to help even though I was there at 9:30 that morning and I had to be there at 9:30 this morning and I was only working on like 4 hours of sleep! And she was pissed at me cuz to her I didn't do any work even though she wasn't even fucking there when I was there working. So tonight when she came in she refused to talk to me and what was really stupid and childish on her part was that whenever she wanted to know something from me she would have someone else ask me. Little kids to that. Like they'll see the person standing right behind them but they'll still say to someone else 'will you ask so-and-so this?' Its so fucking dumb. Whatever. So I went through an emotional rollar coaster today. I started out really depressed and upset. Then I became just ok. Then I felt a little better. Then I got pissed and frustrated. Then I was just okay again. After work me, Allie, Nick and Trevor went to the swap meat and wandered around for a while. I got a new belly ring! Its cool-looking. Now all I need to do is get another tongue ring. I can actually change it now. So Joey told Dana that I like him today. I don't care that he told him though. I think he already knew. I just know that he's not interested in me. And there will probably never be an interest cuz of a bunch of things. First the age difference. Second, the distance between us. Now, he lives in the same damn town (its not like Chris) but neither of us has a car. And mode of transportation is one of the key things in a relationship. There are a bunch of other things too, but I don't really know what they are. Me and David haven't really talked since that night. Not since I stopped liking him. Oh well. It would have been nice to talk to him today about the shit on my mind, but it didn't happen. I talked to Joey instead. Damn, I suddenly just got really tired. I mean I've only been up for like 19 hours and I worked most of those hours. I'm glad I have off tomorrow. I don't want to see work. I have to go to the store though. I was gonna go tonight after work and I planned on it, but then we went out and that screwed with the plans to go to the store. Alright I'm done for tonight cuz I have no clue what else to write.
Thursday. 6.29.06 10:27 pm
Next week's schedule has been corrected so its back to normal. I'm off two days and I'm opening two days. The rest of the days are normal. Man today was definately weird cuz I'm not used to working Thursday. It was busy for the first part of the morning and then it got slow, but we still had business. Joey decided to make his goal today to distract me. And at first it didn't work. After a couple hours of pushing and pushing I gave in. And then it kept bugging me. So I spent half the day distracted. Its not raining right now, but there has been lightning and thunder going on. It is raining in other parts of town just not where I'm at. I got paid today, but since I didn't want to get caught halfway home in the rain, I got a ride so I never got to the store. I'm gonna go tomorrow after I get off work. So basically tonight I'm gonna go hungry. Oh well. Its not like I haven't before. Anywho Joey was supposed to go do something over at the new store and I wanted to go with him cuz I wanted to see the new store. I haven't been over there yet which is why I wanted to go. But because of the weather he decided not to go. He didn't want the shit he was supposed to be loading in his truck to get wet. Maybe another time I'll be able to get to go over to the new store. I have to open tomorrow so I'm gonna be going to bed at a reasonable time tonight. I have nothing else to say for now so I'll write later.
FUCK I hate my boss!! I swear he lives to piss me off!! 2 people quit tonight so I went up there to help them out with closing. I wasn't going to be there all fucking night and I was told that I would get rides both ways. It was easy to get a ride there, but when I was done helping I asked for a ride to go home and no one wanted to do it. The weather is shitty outside, its 10:30 at night and all I want is a simple ride across the fucking street. I asked Erin and she didn't want to leave the store again until it was to go home even though she's the one who told me that she would give me a ride home too. So I ask Joey (the boss) if he could bring me him home when he left with Gary. But since he 'had shit in the back of his truck and he already told Gary he'd give him a ride home there was no room for me' In that big ass fucking truck I doubt very much if there wasn't any room. I have to be there in the morning and all I wanted was a simple fucking ride home so that I could relax and get to bed. I can't fucking believe the people I work with. Raven finally took Erin's car keys and brought me home. I appreciated it a lot even though I probably didn't show it that much. So I'm going to bed kinda pissed and the fact that I have to work with that son of a bitch, dick, fuck tomorrow I'm not sure how happy I'm going to be. I'm just glad that I have Saturday off and that my schedule is back to normal. Whatever. I'm done for tonight.
Wednesday. 6.28.06 11:02 pm
Well I had the day off, again. I'm not liking this arrangment. My schedule better be fixed next week or I'm not gonna be happy. I didn't get up until like quarter after one so I definately slept in. About half an hour later I went up to work because I had to do something. I hung out up there for a while, had something to eat and then came home before the night crew got there. I have to open tomorrow. I also have to clean out the fryers tomorrow (ugh). Oh someone came by earlier. Someone that I haven't seen in a while. He told me to call him sometime and I never got around to it. Oh well; he came by cuz he was in this part of town and when he went up to work he didn't recognize anyone there so he came by here. He hung out for a while. We talked about what's been going on over the last few months and then he had to leave cuz he had to be somewhere by 9. He told me to call him and that he might bring me by his house which he just recently moved in to. I know why he wants me to call him, but I'm trying to figure out a way to tell him no I don't want to have sex with him. I'm pretty sure I'll figure something out. Anywho I watched America's Got Talent tonight. Some of the acts were better than last week and some were much worse, but there were some really talented people on there this time. There's one more episode where they are auditioning and then the people who moved on complete against one another in the semi finals. So I'm looking forward to that episode. There are definately people who deserve the one million dollar prize, but since only one person gets to win it I have no clue who its gonna be. I'll just have to wait until the very end and just hope that someone who is useless doesn't win it. Someone who can take their talent far should be winning the prize. Alright I'm not sure what else to say so I'll write later.
Wednesday. 6.28.06 1:08 am
Today I actually worked, I had to be there by 10. We had 2 huge orders to do first thing this morning; one was close to $400 and the other just over $100. Then we had the prep shit to do. So today was long. Not bad, just long. Tonight was Eastside's night to bowl so we went and it was nowhere near as fun as last night. We weren't teamed up with anyone cuz the other people didn't show up. I mean the team we were supposed to be playing against didn't show up. The other people from our store where there but they were like 4 lanes away from us. So we were by ourselves. Our three games were finished within like an hour and a half. Hopefully next week will be better. Anywho I have no food in my house. I have $9 till Thursday. I mean I can always go in to work and get food there, but there's only so much I can tolerate eating there. I'm hungry and I want food, but its too late now to go out anywhere and since I don't have a car I can't go to a drive-thru. Whatever. So I starve. Until tomorrow at least. I better have a normal work week next week. If not I'm gonna be pissed. Alright I have no clue what else to say so I'll write more later.
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