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*sigh*
Monday. 7.30.07 11:35 pm
Today I went out and got a handful more applications that I need filled out by Thursday {that's when I'll be able to go back out again} There are a few stores that I went to where the only way to apply is online, so I'll most likely be doing that either tomorrow or Wednesday sometime. The only one that gets me is the "application" that I got at Office Depot. It was not just one or two pages. Its a whole frickin packet. I haven't actually looked at it yet, but I can already tell its going to be loads of fun when the time comes to fill it out ... {note the sarcasm}

Anywho, I'm still working on reading HP7. I'm not deeply into finding out what happens; otherwise I'm sure I would have been done with the book by now. I was more excited about receiving it cuz it meant that I'd have something to do. I'm actually looking more forward to when Eclipse comes out. Then I'll be excited. Most likely after I read Eclipse, I'll read another book by Ted Dekker, called Obsession.

Charlie still hasn't called me. I was really hoping he would by now. Maybe he's just really that busy that he can't call. Or when he's not busy, he doesn't remember. I'm not really sure which one I'm hoping it is.
**And for those who asked, Charlie is a friend that I knew back in Freshman and Sophomore year {moreso in sophomore year} that I had a crush on. He's a year and three weeks younger than me and he went to a different school than me, but I met him through his older brother, who was my drum major {those in band will know that term} I originally had a crush on the older brother, but then I met Charlie and my crush was averted to him. I found him {oddly enough, through his brother} via myspace and I've been talking to him off and on through there. When I got back to Vegas, I let him know and told him to call me whenever. That was a little over a week ago. . . The dreams that I've been having about him aren't really helping me stay patient.

Stuart managed to crawl into my dreams again last night. Its slightly easier going a night or two without talking to him, but not by much. The dreams aren't helping me in this situation either. I have to keep fighting the urge to text him. Half the time I don't even know what to say; I just want to talk to him. I've even thought, a couple times, about calling him, knowing he wouldn't answer just to hear his voice in the voicemail message. But I know that wouldn't make it any easier.

My mom's b-day is in a week. I have really no idea what to get her. My sister and I want to get her a computer, but with me not having a job and a $300 cable bill that I still owe, I'm really lacking money. I'll be lucky if I can get together with Steve & Jean and maybe combine efforts to pay for dinner for her. Other than a few small gifts, that's about all I'll be able to get her. Since a computer for her b-day is pretty much out of the question, maybe we can have the money by Christmas for the computer. One can only hope.

Hmm, it seems that when I do nothing all day, I have more to talk about. Weird. But with that, I'm out of stuff to talk about for now so I'll write more later.

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nearly 7 hours {edit}
Monday. 7.30.07 12:23 am
Around 5pm I started up a scan from one of the sites that Ikimashokie suggested I try. It took about 7 hours altogether for it to run a complete scan and to delete the infections. And something tells me that not all of it is gone. . . just a feeling ...

As of right now my computer seems to be working fine. I'm not getting any pop-ups and all my indicators are correct {except maybe the weather indicators, and those are hardly ever correct} Its not freezing up if I click on something too quickly like it was. The biggest thing that seems to be happening right now is that my keyboard is still giving me issues when I type out certain letters. I really need to clean it out.

I finally talked to Stuart after having not talked to him for almost 5 days. He's going through some family issues right now, so I'm going to try and not bug him too often. It was really nice waking up to a text from him, though. I focused my eyes more quickly when I saw that the text was from him.

I'm not quite halfway through HP7, but in the 7 hours I was unable to use the computer {or I was afraid to use it; I didn't want anything to interupt the scan} I managed to get much farther in the book than the last two nights. When I'm reading I have a bad habit of skimming ahead and then going back and reading all the way through. I don't ever skip pages, but I can't always help looking forward onto the next page. Its something I know I should stop, but speed reading and skimming over notes in school kind of put that habit into me. Its a hard one to break.

When I get the money, I'm going to be buying a spyware protection disk thing to install in my computer so that I'll have full and advanced protection, rather than the simplified crap that I have now. I'm not sure when that'll be though, so I'm going to be extremely cautious in everything that I click.

Alright, I don't have anything else to say right now so I'll write more later on. *fingers crossed that my comp stays in check*

{edit} It is now 5am and I've just downloaded a virus/spyware protection thing that AOL provides. Its what my mom has on her computer and its been working out just fine for her. It seems to be working just fine for me, but oddly enough I'm still getting an occasional pop-up. Its really weird, but I don't know what else I can do. My computer is also running a lot smoother than it was yesterday and earlier today. BTW, my keyboard is still annoying me. ... maybe I'm on the computer too much; I'm wearing out the keys ...

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my computer is acting really weird...
Sunday. 7.29.07 3:51 am
I have two indicators to let me know that my wireless connetion is connected and what the signal strength is. The signal strength indicator shows an excellent connection and that I'm obviously connected. The other one that simply indicates that I'm connected to the wireless connection is telling me that I'm not connected. In this case, obviously wrong.

When I click on it to bring up the window listing the different connections available on my computer, the wireless connection says "not connected." But when I click on it to enable it, it only gives me the option to disable; which obviously means its connected.

I'm getting pop-ups even when I don't have IE open, but additional pop-ups are being blocked from the ones that are already open. In the case of this happening, I'm thinking that I might have a virus. I'm not sure since I've never had a virus before, but that's the only explaination I can think of at the present moment.

Another thing is that my keys don't always work. I'll be typing up an entry and I'll go to type a word, but only half the letters type. Its almost like the computer is not registering the keys that I'm pushing. It doesn't happen all the time, but more so recently. Now, my computer is only a year old; I should not be having these problems. Actually, I've never had this many problems with my computer, ever. Its getting rather frustrating.

Earlier, I was unable to post a shout because my computer would not let me. I clicked on the "post a shout" button, but nothing happened. I could go to any other page I wanted, but I wasn't able to post a shout. Thus ruining the effect of the shout that would have been posted. I don't even remember what I was going to say. Ugh!

Its 4am right now and I'm wide awake and quite annoyed. I think I'm going to end this here and go read more of HP7. I'll write up an actual entry later in the day.

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Skin
Saturday. 7.28.07 3:04 am
If you like suspense/murder mysteries, I'd definately suggest you read Skin by Ted Dekker. Its full of plot twists that you'd never imagine coming. You'll find yourself getting attached to certain characters, but then the plot twists again and you wonder if your heart is going with the right character. You're left wondering and guessing right up to the end.

Since I'm done with that book however, I'm about to start reading HP7, which arrived today. My sister is already 7 chapters into it, and I would have been, but I wanted to finish Skin first so that I wouldn't be distracted.

I'm seriously considering staying up the whole night and going out tomorrow, on foot, to the plaza area that my mom works in. Its about a 20 minute walk from here, so maybe if I leave around 8:30 or 9am I'll be able to avoid the extreme desert summer heat. I'll be able to turn in my application to Party Pro and see if Tony {who's nametag said Juan; you make the connection} was able to scrounge up an application to Big Lots. Fingers crossed.

Anywho, I took some time out today and turned the hall coat closet into my own personal closet. I was able to borrow hangers from Jean so that I wouldn't have to buy them. I did this so that I wouldn't be living out of a suitcase. It really is rather annoying having to lug a suitcase around every time you want to take a shower or do laundry. Everything in that closet now, with the exception of a few coats and a blanket, is mine. All my clothes that were hung up in my apt closet are hanging up now. Its much much smaller than the closet I had, but I'll have to make due until I get my own place.

I didn't have any weird dreams last night, and I'm sort of thankful. I don't know if I could handle two nights in a row of oddly crazy-weird dreams. Only one dream in particular stuck out in my mind as a possibility that it could maybe happen: the one about Charlie and I. All it consisted of was us on a beach walking together in the sand. It was evening, not quite sunset, but close enough. The waves were gentle, and there were few people on the beach. It was warm and there was a nice breeze coming off the water. Our hands were interlocked as we were walking, but nothing was being said. It was really the most peaceful dream that I've had in quite some time.

Alright, its 3:20am and I'm going to start on HP7. I shall be back at some point later in the day.

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today
Thursday. 7.26.07 9:27 pm
We didn't get up early-ish like we planned. Actually, we ended up not going out till after 3pm. My plan of staying up the whole night lasted till around 6am. My mom woke me up at 11:30am and I dozed off and on till almost 2 when I decided that I should actually get up.

We went to the DMV first. The one that's closest to us only does commercial vehicle tests. So I wasn't able to take the test today. Whenever its convenient for my mom, we'll be going to one of the other locations. I'm not looking terribly forward to it, but its a necessary thing.

After that we went over to the Party Pro shop by my mom's work. I got an application for there and we wandered around for a bit. We left the party shop and walked down to the Big Lots. They said they weren't hiring right now, but one of the regular customers at my mom's work works at Big Lots and he told her that he might be able to get me an application due to a possible opening soon {which pretty much means someone is either about to get fired or on the verge of quitting} I'm crossing fingers that that happens.

We were going to head down to Target afterwards, but it was getting late and we still needed to get home and fix dinner. So I didn't get too much done today.

Tomorrow I can't go out anywhere until after UPS gets here. Tomorrow is the arrival of my HP7 book! I'm excited. It definately means that I won't be getting a whole lot of sleep this weekend. I'm imagining it will be just as addictive as the other 6 were; I just won't be able to put it down.

Since I finished HP6 last night, I'm going to be reading a book tonight called Skin. The author's name is Ted Dekker. My sister recommended it and said that as soon as the first person was killed I'd be hooked. So I'm going to try and read it all tonight so as not to interfere with HP7.

So with that ... I'm off to read Skin.

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Another day of nothing
Wednesday. 7.25.07 10:27 pm
The title basically explains what I did today.

Last night was the first night in a while that I went without talking to Stuart. It bothered me, but there's not really a whole lot that I could do. I'm determined to not be the one to contact him first. I want him to want to talk to me. And not to talk to me simply because I want him to.

Tomorrow should be interesting. I don't know how long I'm going to be out, but I do know that I will definately be going out. We're aiming for around 11 or 12 so we'll probably be gone for the greater part of the afternoon. I'll be sure to elaborate about my day tomorrow night when I get on.

I'm so confused about the whole Stuart thing. Its starting to drive me crazy. Its really odd that the bathing suit I wear now used to make me think of my ex. Its been almost 3 years now, though, so my ex is no longer the one it makes me think of. Instead, I wore this the night that Stuart took me to the pool so it now makes me think of that night. Even reading HP6, there was a part in that book that made me think of the night at the pool. There seems to be no escaping Stuart.

Anywho, I was hoping that Charlie would have called me by now. I kinda wanted to hang out with him this weekend. He told me that he would call when he wasn't busy. I've decided that I'm going to wait for him to call, but if I still haven't heard from him in a week, I'm going to message him and see if he'd be up to hanging out next weekend. I really hope he calls me though. I do want to see him. Its been about 5 years.

Alrighty, that's it. I can't think of anything else to say. I'll write tomorrow.

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