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On edge
Wednesday. 5.29.13 6:52 pm
I nearly punched someone in the face this morning. 20 minutes in to my shift and I was already ready to hurt someone. The day did not start out well.

I've been on edge for at least a couple days now, though I'm not entirely sure why. I hope whatever it is that's causing it passes soon. Or I break down and cry for a good 20 minutes. As long as it's not a panic attack break down. I feel that would almost make it worse.

Tomorrow will probably be busier than I'd like it to be. I will most likely spend a majority of my shift being as unproductive as possible. If I cared less about my job, I would just call off, but since I like earning money, I will save the remaining sick days that I have for a rainy day. Or a day when I actually might kill someone and the only way to avoid that is to call off sick. We'll see what happens.

I just need this weekend to come. I need two days off. Maybe it's time to start casting a line again and see if I get any bites. The last few times I've cast my line, I've gotten jack squat. Less than jack squat. More like air.

Ugh. These entries really haven't been the lightest recently. Sorry about that. Hopefully with the time off this weekend, I'll have some time to recover from my funk. Hell, I might even play the lottery. Just for shits and giggles.

Time to go lose myself in a book.

Until tomorrow. . .

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Two more days
Tuesday. 5.28.13 7:38 pm
I am definitely looking forward to this weekend and for several reasons. First, it's the weekend. No work. That is probably the most obvious reason. Second, it's payday. This particular check will have extra monies on it thanks to some overtime and with it being the third check this month, there will be no medical expenses extracted. So that will be fairly awesome indeed.

Third, my shoes are supposed to be arriving on Friday. Fourth, I will be buying myself a couple new books that I completely plan on reading {unlike a year and a half ago when I bought the book that I just recently read and finished. Although I think at that time it was more just me spending money in an attempt to alleviate sadness during a rough time and not because I actually wanted to read it.}

Anywho, I digress. The final reason is because I am supposed to hang out with a friend who is in town visiting for a week! I haven't seen him in probably close to two years now so I'm excited. I have no idea what we're going to be doing, but whatever it is, I'm sure it'll be a good time. The last time I was this excited about seeing someone who was visiting was probably when I drove to Tucson back in like, '09. So basically, never when someone else was visiting. I have always been the visitor.

Today was fairly uneventful. Hopefully the next two days are as well. I want this week to end smoothly so that I can be as stress-free as possible {for me} on Friday so that I can make the most of out it. I have moved on {mostly} from the funk that I was in yesterday. I slept horribly last night so this morning I actually kind of wanted to cry. I just felt like I was on my tipping point, but as the day went on and nothing too exciting/crazy happened, I calmed down a little bit. Hopefully tonight will not be a repeat of last.

Alright, two more days to get through before my weekend. Here's to hoping they go buy quickly and smoothly.

Until tomorrow. . .

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Not ready yet
Monday. 5.27.13 7:30 pm
Even if a change occurs that doesn't directly affect me, but still affects me, I like knowing ahead of time so that I can mentally adjust. I guess this is just the next step in moving on. I hate change. Even small ones. You'd think with all the fucking changes I've been through in my life, I'd be used to it by now, but no. I hate them even more. Which in a way makes sense because of how much I've had to deal with change. I want something to stay constant for once.

I bought a book today. Half Price Books was having their Memorial Day sale and I decided to take advantage. I will probably start reading it once I'm finished with the other one.

I had more, but I'm distracted so I'm going to try to lose myself in the book for a while. Perhaps tomorrow I'll have more.

Until then. . .

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Sunday. 5.26.13 7:36 pm
Apparently when I bring in a home-cooked meal for my lunch at work, I'm not supposed to eat it at work. This is not the first time I've brought food in from home and didn't get the chance to eat it because shit hit the fan at work and my lunch break never came. I end up having to bring the food home and eat it there.

Just to test karma, I'm not going to be bringing home cooked food with me tomorrow. I do not want two busy days in a row. Especially not if they're both like today. I will probably wait until at least Tuesday.

I'm more than halfway through the book that I started reading a few days ago. I would probably be finished with it by now, but I think I skipped a day. I will probably have it finished before the weekend.

Tomorrow is a holiday at work. The clinics will be closed, but due to this, Urgent Care will be super busy. It always is on holidays that occur during the week. And guess who will be spending half the shift posted at UC? Yeah. Joy. You can feel my excitement through the screen.

Alright, I am going to make an attempt at being in bed early tonight. We'll see what happens.

Until tomorrow. . .

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Might as well
Saturday. 5.25.13 7:01 pm
Today didn't feel quite as rushed as I was afraid it would, but I still wish I had another day to sleep in. That's the only downfall to working overtime on my day off.

I stayed in bed until around 9. I was awake a handful of times before then, but I refused to get out of bed that early. I got my laundry done, took a shower, put my clothes away, did the dishes and headed up north to get some gas.

I had $1 off per gallon rewards with Safeway that I needed to use and use them I did. It felt pretty good filling up my tank for under $30. I also have a full stock of groceries in my place. Something that I haven't had in a while. All that shopping I did has multiple rewards to go with it.

After I got home, I baked up some French's Fried Onion crispy chicken. It came out rather tasty. I also put together a couple simple turkey wraps. All that's on them is turkey and chive and onion cream cheese. I used regular and spinach tortillas. It's a good finger snack. I will probably be making more of them tomorrow. I'm kind of cooked out for now. Oh, I also cooked up a pasta salad. I ate some of it. The rest I will probably take to work with me tomorrow.

Anywho, I am going to continue reading while I still have the natural light. Once the sun goes down, I will probably go to bed. I'm definitely not looking forward to working tomorrow. At least it's Sunday. The day should {hopefully} be fairly laid back. Then Monday is a holiday so that will also be a fairly simple day. After that I'll have three days to get through before the weekend again! I already can't wait.

Until tomorrow. . .

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Way too early
Friday. 5.24.13 8:23 pm
Waking up to an alarm to get ready for work on your day off is never how anyone wants to spend the first day of their weekend, but that's how I started mine.

I woke up at 5 with my alarm, hit the 15 minute snooze, woke up at the 5:15 alarm and reset another alarm to go off at 5:25. I didn't really care if I had to sort of rush to get dressed. I really didn't want to get out of bed. The first, probably, three hours of my shift I was just dragging. I don't normally get up until between 8 and 9 on Friday so my brain was questioning why it was having to function earlier than that. My body was also mad that we were wearing the rather uncomfortable uniform instead of pajamas.

I started to 'wake up' sometime around 9ish, but only just. My pace quickened to the normal speed and my eyes were fully open, rather than the half open they had been, but my brain and body were still questioning my decision to work this overtime. My wallet will be thanking me next payday, though.

Most of the shift went well. We had a situation in the Labor and Delivery section of our campus, but if anything happened with it, it happened after the shift was over so as long as it's been resolved by Sunday, I honestly don't care.

I came home after work, changed and went back out. I wanted to continue grocery shopping and get the things that I didn't have the money for on my previous shopping trip {I finally got my sick pay that I had been shorted on the last check.} Because of the awesomeness that is the Safeway App, I quickly earned some reward points for gas and now I have enough to get $1 per gallon so that's awesome, considering gas is at, or above, $4/gallon again.

The problem with working overtime on my days off, besides not being able to sleep in, is that with the one day left that I have, I feel rushed. I hate feeling rushed. Even if I know that all I have to do is laundry, having only one day in between work weeks just isn't enough to reset the system. Which is honestly why I would prefer working a 16 hour shift on a normal work day than sacrifice a day off. Oh well. Overtime is overtime. It really doesn't matter the form in which it comes in.

Alrighty, I'll probably be up for at least another hour or so. My unexpected 3 hour nap that I just woke up from at 8 has left me groggy. I could totally have just gone back to sleep without even thinking twice about it, but I wanted to come on here and update for the day.

Until tomorrow NuTang. . .

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