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The weather
A constant state of being.
My Unkymood Punkymood (Unkymoods)
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Perfect illusion
Monday. 5.29.17 8:16 pm
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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On hold
Saturday. 5.13.17 5:05 pm
The apartment search has been placed on hold for now. I've decided that I would rather pay off my credit cards, and also start saving for the vacations that are quickly approaching. We're already halfway through May and in less than 5 months, I'm going away again. Then a few months later, and another month after that, and then hopefully another few months after that. So yeah, moving has been put on hold.

In an attempt to keep my pod from becoming a sauna this summer, I will be purchasing blackout curtains. I've been hesitant to drill holes in to the walls because I'm horrible about remembering to fill them once I'm ready to vacate, but it'll be worth it to not have it get too hot since I'm now staying here. I mean, there's already pinholes in the wall from me putting up sheets over the last few summers in an attempt to keep the sunlight out.

My vehicle is no longer a hazard to my front seat passengers. I had gotten a recall in the mail a little over a month ago for the passenger airbag. It had the possibility of exploding upon impact, and throwing out shrapnel at people's faces. Not exactly the type of safety feature that airbags usually advertise. After waiting about a month for the letter to come in the mail saying that the part was ready, I decided to call and check on the status. The guy who I spoke to was super helpful, told me they hadn't received anything yet, but instead actually ordered the part for me. And because it was a recall, I didn't have to pay for it to be replaced. I took it in today, and was told it would take a little under two hours. It took about 45 minutes so that was a nice surprise. Overall, it was far better than the last time I had taken my car in to a dealer to get serviced, which was years ago at this point. No one was trying to convince me to trade in my car, no one tried to upsell anything to me, or try to convince me that I needed this done, or needed that done. I know I need some work on my car, but nothing that I can afford at the moment. They even took it through their car wash and got it mostly clean again. I need to have it detailed, but it looks much better than it did before.

I feel like I've been busy again, but since I'm not writing about it every day, or posting things, I am having a hard time keeping track of everything I'm actually doing. This weekend, the only plan was to have my car fixed, and it shall remain as the only plan. Next weekend I'm busy both Saturday and Sunday, the weekend after is Memorial Day weekend and I have plans on at least one of those days, though not sure which day yet. Then the weekend after a few of us are going out of town because that's what the one friend wants to do for her birthday. I think the weekend after that I'm going out of town again, and then maybe the weekend after that is a hike? I don't know when I'm going to have another chill weekend, so this one now needs to be taken full advantage of.

Anywho, I wanted to try to avoid going another almost full month between entries so I figured I'd type this up real quick.

Until next time. . .

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Unintended
Saturday. 4.29.17 9:21 am
I didn't mean to go almost an entire month without writing. It just kind of happened that way. Though, this has been more of a busy month so perhaps that's why? I dunno. Either way, let me see if I can catch up a little.

Earlier this month, the week before Easter, I had probably the busiest week that I've had in a while, especially considering most of the activity occurred during the actual work week. I ate at a new place, saw a movie I probably wouldn't have seen on my own, went out to lunch with a coworker, went out to dinner with someone I've not seen in over two decades, saw another stage production. I ate out 5 of the 7 days that week, and was definitely feeling it that weekend.

I also had a dentist appointment scheduled for that Saturday prior to the busiest week, but I ended up making poor life choices and was sick the morning of the appointment so I had to reschedule.

I rescheduled that to yesterday, and had it tacked on to the afternoon of my annual appointment, since I was already taking time off from work. I don't like the dentist; I never have. And the last time I went was just as horrible as from when I was a kid. Yesterday's appointment however, though still not all happy fun times, was a much better experience. I'm not looking forward to going back in 4 weeks, but I am really hoping to make the improvements that I need so that I can just stick to a basic every 6 month cleaning. I am super thankful, however, for the fact that this dentist doesn't seem to think I need surgery. Unlike what I was told last time and hence why (part of the reason anyway) I put off going back for so long.

Oh, I got a new phone last weekend. It's the newest Galaxy model and I'm liking it so far. It's nice having a battery that lasts me a couple days. I also bought a smart watch to go with it. It's not as awkward to wear as I remember watches being. Perhaps it's because it syncs to my phone and doesn't exactly feel like a watch? Who knows. But I'm happy with the purchase altogether. I have yet to really test out the camera and get some new pictures. I've mostly just kind of taken the same shots that I've recently been taking, rather than going out and exploring. Something I know I will need to remedy soon.

Anywho, I'm probably forgetting some things so if anything comes to mind, I'll just add in an edit. Otherwise, that's all I got for now.

Until next time. . .

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Fourteen
Saturday. 4.1.17 6:04 pm
Well then ... I think back in Sept/Oct of last year I'd said something about maybe trying another 'entry every day' type of thing for this year. Considering today is April 1st, and this is only the 14th entry of the year, I'd say I've done quite horribly in really any attempt at trying to write every day.

I suppose it's more because of where I'm at in my life. I don't feel like I need to get things out as much as I did the year I wrote *almost* every day(I think I missed 7 or 8 in the entire year). It's not that I'm particularly busy; kind of the opposite, in fact, but there's just no real pull to write anything.

I still have the same car I've had for the last almost 8 years. I still have the same phone number that I've had for almost 10. I've even lived at the same address now for over 5 years. I've been working at the same location for over 6 years (though the job title has changed.) Life has kind of taken a rather consistent turn for me; one I'm very much not used to. Even though I still have the urge to move on a regular basis, (I think I've talked about this before) there's really nothing pushing or pulling me away at the moment.

I feel like I'm in this weird limbo of stability, but without really being stable. It's kind of hard to explain how I'm feeling, and the more I think about putting it in to words, the harder it becomes to really even understand it inside my own head. It's almost like I'm in a place where I've become comfortable with the consistency, and yet I'm always expecting that sudden change. Something to throw it all off. I lived that way for so long that I was terrified at just the simple thought of settling somewhere.

However, one of my biggest fears is of getting stuck. Like, I could never live on an island. Even if I don't go anywhere, the idea of not being able to go anywhere, whenever I wanted, makes me very uncomfortable. The last time I went away, I didn't have a rental car, and that made me quite uncomfortable. If I'm staying as a guest at someone's home, even if I know that I don't have to keep a schedule, it makes me uncomfortable in the knowledge that I might be judged for keeping weird hours. It may not completely stop me, but it makes me uncomfortable.

It's irrational, especially since I usually stay put. I guess all of the moving around has affected me, even though I've been in one place for longer than I've ever been before, and have become very used to the every day normalcy of it all. Though I don't remember the last time I went out for a drive, just for the sake of getting away, it causes me anxiety at just the idea of that not being an option.

Anwyho, this kind of went off topic, I suppose. There's really nothing new and/or exciting going on in my life as of the current moment. Hopefully this holds anyone who actually reads this over enough until the next entry.

Until then. . .

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New-ish
Saturday. 3.25.17 9:49 pm
They finally went through the process of upgrading out internet. It's not nearly as good as if I were to pay for my own plan, but it's 4 times better than it was before. I wish I was exaggerating, but really, the numbers went from 20/5 mbps to 100/100 mbps. I can stream *most* videos on YouTube in HD now. Still not 1080p, but at least 720p. Although, even with great internet, if the computer isn't built to handle a lot of things happening at once, it still slows down or skips on videos where there's a lot going on. Still, though, it's nice having faster internet.

I got my hair trimmed up today. After that last post, even just a couple days later, I kind of started to like the length that it had gotten to, and so I was hesitant to cut it back to the shortness that it was before. I wasn't much a fan of the way it looked during the 3-5 month mark post-original trim, but at the 6 month mark, it was starting to look nice. Especially with the layers that she'd put in. So going in today, I told my stylist that I wanted it somewhere between the original cut, and the 3 month mark (I had kind of a collage of progression photos) so that it'll take less time for me to grow it to the length I want it. The plan is to let it grow, get it trimmed at 6 months, have the layers touched up, then cut it short again in about a year. We'll see how that goes.

I got new bed sheets, and deep cleaned my comforter so now everything smells nice. And the sheet is actually staying on my mattress. The one I'd been using had been old and so the elasticity wasn't really there anymore. I had to adjust the fitted sheet at least once a week. Hopefully I have better success with this new one.

I'll be getting a pedicure tomorrow, likely with Spring/Easter/pastel colors this time around. Afterwards I'll be seeing Beauty and the Beast. I'm looking forward to seeing this movie. There will be food at some point in the day, just not sure what or in what order in regard to nails and the movie. That's something that will just get played by ear.

Next weekend, I think the plan is to get together with the best friend to help her paint, but I'll have to double check with her when the time gets closer. Coordinating with them is always challenging, and has become slightly more so with the addition of her adorable little Miss. Which is fine; makes total sense. Just means it's nicer when we do finally get together.

Okay, I'm fading fast from a sushi coma so I'm gonna knock out early.

Until next time. . .

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Adulting
Monday. 3.13.17 9:49 pm
This past weekend was the first weekend in a while that I'd not had any set plans. I did go out and get pizza with a couple friends, but that was kind of a last minute thing, and that's the only time where I actually let my pod. It was really nice having a weekend where I didn't have to go anywhere, or do anything, or see anyone; aside from the pizza, of course.

After work on Friday, a friend of mine and I went out and got sushi. We're both addicts, so if one of us suggests sushi, the other one will always agree to it. It's the one and only food that I will overeat and not even feel the slightest bit guilty. It also surprises people as to just how much I'm able to eat when it comes to sushi. Oh well. I guess everyone has that one thing, right?

Because I spent the weekend just mostly hanging out, being lazy, I had to adult today. I needed to go grocery shopping for the next two weeks, as well as make a Target run for toiletries that I'd run out of, and fill up my tank as well. I spent more money at the grocery store and way more money at Target than I'd originally planned, but the things I got were *mostly* necessary. The new bed sheets, tiny crock pot, pens, and Reeces eggs I could have probably managed without for a while longer, but those are all things that will be put to use. I also bought two giant mugs for ma for mother's day. I know it's a couple months away still, but I saw them and just knew I had to get them for her. She loves giant mugs.

Tomorrow all of the money that I've spent since Friday should have fully gone through my bank account so I can see exactly how much I have left, and then figure out how much to put toward the reminder of the bills I have for this month. It's nice knowing that I can afford all of these things without having to worry about sacrificing one thing or another. I even afforded myself an extra couple luxuries in the form of tickets to another touring stage production, as well as putting money aside for the hair cut I have scheduled next weekend. It's been 6 months since my last cut and it's starting to get on my nerves. I'm really not sure how I managed to deal with it being below my elbows. Although, I didn't like the short cuts I'd gotten back then; the stylist I have now makes my hair look good short so it makes me want to keep it that way. It also makes me look a little closer to my age, as well as it being much, much easier to maintain.

Anywho, I'm working toward getting in to a new sleep pattern in hopes that if I stay up later, the frequency at which I've been waking up during the night will lessen. It'll also be better for once we get in to the significantly longer daylight hours; going to bed at 9 when it's still bright and sunny outside is quite challenging.

Until next time. . .

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