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starting {and hopefully sticking to} a routine
Sunday. 1.18.09 4:10 pm
Not even a week after I cancel my gym membership, I renewed it. Luckily it's a slightly cheaper price and I have access to a more exclusive gym, as opposed to before when I could only access certain ones.

I renewed it on Friday and today was the first day I went. I only went to one class, but it was more than enough of a workout.

It was an hour-long cycling class. Non-stop spinning for one hour with seated and standing switch-offs. The standing was what got me. I couldn't do it for the whole time they were, but I didn't have to if I couldn't do it. We were told to push ourselves, but work at our own pace and not to over-do it. Towards the end, I finally worked it out so that I could stand and pedal for the whole 30-90 seconds that they were doing it.

My thighs are what hurts the most; that's what you work out when you're doing the standing pedalling. I'm sure after a while, it'll not hurt as much when I'm done with the class.

I'll be going to this class three times a week: Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. It's a lot of fun and well worth the pain afterwards.

Jacob signed up for a membership also so we'll be working out together on certain days.

I'll be sticking with it this time. Unlike last time when I initially got the membership; I only used it maybe 5 times. For some reason, I'm more motivated this time than I was a year ago. Not sure why, but it's a good thing and hopefully it sticks.

I have two days to rest and recoop before I get back on the bike.

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last night's Blues
Saturday. 1.10.09 4:07 pm
So Jacob and I went to see the Blue Man Group last night. It was still {and will probably always be} just as fun and awesome as the first three times I went. What made it even better was that, since he had never seen the show, he had a lot of fun with it too. Just like I said last time, it is well worth the price. If you're ever in Vegas, that is definitely one of the shows you need to see.

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Tuesday. 1.6.09 4:48 pm
Seriously ...

just meh.

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Saturday. 1.3.09 10:27 am
I've come to admit that I have a problem. I think I've known about it for a while, but I've just not been willing to admit what I've been doing. And either I've ignored him or he's just not said anything about what I've been doing.

I realize and admit that I am not properly prioritizing. I am thinking about myself, but in the wrong way. It seems, as of late, that every single decsion I make revolves around whether I'll be able to see Jacob.

My shift hours changed and all I could think about was how I won't be able to see Jake for that long before he goes to work. I'm being offered a better shift to work on and all I can think about is that I won't be able to do the same things with Jake as I've been able to do.

I go to this place or I drive here or hang out with this person, it all goes back to Jacob.

I have a problem.

I guess because I've let it go on for so long, it hurts to even think about working on fixing it.

Him or I moving out will probably be the best thing that will happen to us. It'll severly limit our seeing one another, but it seems to be the only way. I have no refuge, no retreat that I can go to just to get away for a few days. He's not the only one who wants to be alone. He just ... wants it more than I do.

I have to work on doing things for myself where my mind doesn't immediately focus on Jacob. The thing is, I want our relationship to keep going. I don't want to take a break or break it off.

Physical seperation from each other seems to be exactly what we both need, though. Not easy to do when you live together and neither one has a place to go. Or money to get away for a few days.

I need to talk to him about this. It's something that's bothering me and I know it's bothering him. I can only hope the result ends up tolerable.

A better blog will be coming soon. He bought Blue Man Group tickets for me and him for Christmas. We're going to the show this Friday.

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Monday. 12.22.08 3:17 pm
Finally sent out my Christmas cards. I know they're not going to get there by Thursday. Hopefully they'll be there before the New Year.

I still haven't gone Christmas shopping. I have to get it done tomorrow. I'm crazy as it is for waiting, {not entirely my fault; I didn't get paid until this past Friday} but I'm not crazy enough to do all my shopping on Christmas Eve. I've got plans for that day anyway.

Nothing terribly new has happened.

I know, I live such the exciting life. But that's the 'update' I've got for ya so far. Maybe I'll write after Christmas.

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I'm not back yet
Wednesday. 12.3.08 12:51 pm
~~ November 16: Intervention ... I'm brought to the mall to buy a dress. Mind, I hate dresses and I have not worn one, by choice, since I was 6 years old. Hence it being called an intervention.

~~ November 21: The big night ... The dress was purchased. Jacob took me to the Top of the World Restaurant at the top of the Stratosphere Casino/Hotel. It's something that I've wanted to do for a while and we had discussed in the months prior to his spur of the moment plan.

~~ November 21 - 22: The Luxor ... After dinner he surprised me by handing me a room key. I'd also been wanting to stay at the Luxor so he added to the Top of the World surprise by getting us a suite at the Luxor.

Needless to say, that weekend was amazing. It was the best weekend I've ever had.

November 27: Thanksgiving ... I spent the morning and early afternoon with my boyfriend and his mom at the aunt's house. The cousins from Phoenix were in town so I was finally able to meet them. The food was good. The mid-afternoon into early evening, I spent with my sister and her boyfriend at his grandmother's house. Her food was freaking delicious. I definitely stuffed my face there. Afterwards I came home and napped from 7pm-11pm. After my nap, I met up with Jake and his cousins at the bowling alley and bowled until 2am when I had to leave for work.

November 28: The birthday ... Jake's mom's birthday was the Friday after Thanksgiving. The three of us went bowling in the morning; then she went out with friends to a double feature. Jacob and I just hung out at home until around 10pm when his cousin called and asked if we wanted to see a movie. So we met up with him at the theater to see Transporter 3. It was good.

~~ November 29: MINI ... Jake had forgotten his lunch at home that day so I offered to bring it up to him later in his shift. When I did, he, his coworker and I started talking about the fact that I like MINI Coopers. Well, his coworker happens to have a MINI and he let me drive it. I was only allowed to go around the parking lot, but in the empty part of the lot I got that thing up to 60. I'ma try and borrow it this Saturday. I doubt he'll let me, but hey, it's worth a try. I mean, I'll bring it back before he has to go home ... it's not like he can go anywhere while he's at work.

Only 29 more days until 2009.

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