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A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness." ~ D.H. Lawrence "Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?" "Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost." ~ Seneca "People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect." ~ Daydream Nation "All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death." ~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes "The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road." ~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita "It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." ~ William Blake Think about it Musicalities! Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics Web Comics and Such A Distant Soil (Some nudity) The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff) Aquapunk Axe Cop Basic Instructions Bear Nuts Beeserker Blue Milk Special Bug Buttersafe ChannelATE Cigarro & Cerveja Crunchy Bunches Curia Regis Cyanide and Happiness dead winter (has some explicit stuff) Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?) Diesel Sweeties DUBBLEBABY Eat That Toast! E-merl.com The End Evil Diva Evil Inc. Existential Comics The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon For Lack of a Better Comic Forming (Explicit) Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?) Mirror The Last Halloween Last Train to Old Town L.A.W.L.S. The League of Evil Genius Legend of Bill Living With Insanity (some nudity) Love Me Nice Married to the Sea Meaty Yogurt Medium Large The Meek Metacarpolis Monsterhood Monsterkind The Moon Prince Moth (Some nudity) Mr. Lovenstein Muddlers Beat Natalie Dee Nedroid The Non-Adventures of Wonderella Optipess Out There Owen's Uncles Phuzzy Comics Political Cartoonists Index Poorly Drawn Lines Powernap The Property of Hate Red Meat Rice Boy Robbie and Bobby Rosscott, Inc. Safely Endangered Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Savage Chickens Scary Go Round Scenes from a Multiverse The Secret Knots Serenity Rose Stand Still. Stay Silent Stinking Hellebore Strong Female Protagonist Subnormality Tales of Pylea Three Word Phrase (some nudity) Tiny Kitten Teeth Toothpaste for Dinner Trying Human (Some nudity) Two Guys and Guy Wilde Life Witchy xkcd Yellow Peril (PG-13) Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics The Abominable Charles Christopher The Adventures of Dr. McNinja The Adventures of Ellie Connelly American Hell Bag of Toast Bear in Mind Bobwhite The Book of Biff Brat-halla Brightest Broodhollow Bullfinch Camp Weedonwantcha Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff) Chainsawsuit Conspiracy Friends! Daisy is Dead Distillum Dream Life Dumm Comics Ectopiary (Some nudity) Edemia Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life A Fine Example Finn and Charlie are HITCHED Floodmud Freaks! Green Wake Gun Show Hark! A Vagrant Head Doctor Productions Hello with Cheese Helpful Figures Hollow Mountain IDK Comics Inscribing Ardi Intragalactic The Intrepid Girlbot JBabb Comics Kyle & Atticus Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space Letters to a Wild Boar Lovecraft is Missing Manta-man Meat and Plastic Minimalism Sucks Mis- Moe Moon Town The Nerds of Paradise Nimona No Reason Comics Odd-Fish One Swoop Fell Patches Pictures for Sad Children Raymondo Person A Redtail's Dream Riotfish Roy's Boys (PG 13?) Run Freak Run Saint's Way Shortpacked! Sin Titulo Snowflakes Split Lip Spooky Doofus SubCulture Super Buzzkill The Super Fogeys The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston Thermohalia Troubletown Mirror Ugly Girl YU + ME 2815 Monument Pure Flash Awesomeness Aardvardkbutter.com Angry Alien Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry The Frown Hoogerbrugge Other Bogleech Clients from Hell Brian Despain Creatures in My Head Damn You Auto Correct! Jhonen Vasquez's site Overheard in New York Passive Aggressive Notes Submarinechannel.com Superdickery UHpinions Whirled | Empathy, sympathy, support, identity, desire, change [Ask] Thursday, October 30, 2014 Comment! (2) | Recommend! An old song Wednesday, October 29, 2014 I remember playing my She Wants Revenge CD for the first time and seeing 66 tracks pop up on the display of the CD player. I just let it play through the official songs, then all the empty tracks, until it got to the hidden track at the end. The song is technically called "Killing Time" I think, but it's still listed as "[Hidden Track]" in my iTunes library. I don't listen to it very often but I guess I have a nostalgic fondness for it. At first she was spellbound Hanging on his every word Every touch perfect She could kiss him all night But he�s no longer the bad guy Now he�s just her boyfriend She doesn�t know how to tell him �My dear, there�s been a change of plans� She turns the phone off, hide behind little lies And shuts the blinds, turns the lights low, laying low She tells herself that he won't mind, he'll never mind And says goodbye, but he can't hear, it's killing time I've never really been sure what this song is about. Maybe suicide? It's not entirely clear from the lyrics though. I've kind of been binge-listening to songs lately and it's been this one and "Waltz" by Max Vernon. Maybe they have a certain vibe in common that resonates with me, I'm not sure. There's something ominous there, I guess. Going to my first real Halloween party on Friday I think... I should really get a costume, but I don't know what I want to do. I'd kind of like to dress as a mime someday. I have a not-totally-irrational fear that costume makeup would do bad things to my skin though. I'll probably half-ass something at the last minute like I usually do for Halloween... Comment! (2) | Recommend! I forgot I had this picture [2P] Sunday, October 26, 2014 Comment! (1) | Recommend! I'm not sure I've ever done this before Sunday, October 26, 2014 A friend (the same one who recommended It's Such a Beautiful Day) suggested I read Ubik by Philip K. Dick. I thought it was going to be a short story, and started reading it a few hours ago. Once I finished it, I looked it up on Wikipedia and realized it was a novel. Welp. I suppose that would explain why it took roughly three hours to finish. So uh, I guess I accidentally read a full book tonight. First time for everything? I sort of liked it. I liked it enough to get over my dislike of reading lengthy things on the computer, anyway. So maybe that means I found it very engaging? (I wonder if I'll ever stop using my behavior to gauge my feelings about things?) Some parts of it were very scary though. Even though I almost exclusively read science fiction and horror, sometimes the combination of the two is almost unbearably unsettling. --- It's strange to think that it's been seven months since I broke up with my ex. It feels like a lifetime ago. Those two and a half years are so nebulous in my memories now. A few things I remember clearly, but none of it seems real. I guess that sometimes my life now doesn't entirely feel real either, though. In some ways I feel more unstable now than I did before, but I also feel more creative and contemplative. Less tethered to practicalities. I have privately wondered (worried?) on various occasions if the urgently creative/expressive part of me was dead or gone forever. If I'd ever see it again. I wondered what happened to me. I was never sure if it was just some natural consequence of aging or what. And I missed it, you know? That was something important to me. That need for expression. But it seemed I couldn't force it to come back, and I resignedly accepted its absence. I wonder if I'll get back some interests too? Sometimes I think about my life and I feel like I'm not truly interested in anything, and I have to refer to lists I made in the past if people ask me what my hobbies are, and it seems sad and embarrassing. And I think if the internet didn't connect me to people I care about and want to talk to, I would try to stay off the computer more. I've been feeling like too much computer usage is related to some of these issues, but it's so hard to stop. Comment! (0) | Recommend! Existential Life Crisis Lullaby Saturday, October 25, 2014 I found this song today and I find it mm... amusing? I'm not usually fond of this musical style but I enjoy it here. The lyrics are pretty great. This one is also pretty funny. Comment! (0) | Recommend! Wanting Friday, October 24, 2014 A friend recommended this to me. While I'd seen other works of Don Hertzfeldt's, I hadn't seen It's Such a Beautiful Day before. Some parts of it felt deeply relevant to my own experiences, despite the fact that I haven't actually been in the situation the main character is in. He told me to watch it when I had a "clear mind" but I'm not sure if that was necessary. I feel I might have found it striking regardless. It really is amazing. I ended up watching a few other Hertzfeldt shorts afterward. I thought this one was pretty amusing. Youtube autoplayed the next video after that, which was The Meaning of Life. It had some Tchaikovsky pieces in it that I hadn't heard in awhile, one of which was the Waltz of the Flowers from The Nutcracker. I think my mom used to take me to see The Nutcracker every year, but at some point I didn't want to go anymore. I think I would like to see it again now though. I might have more appreciation for it as an adult than I did as a child. Plus I haven't seen a live performance of anything in awhile. Maybe something to do over my winter break... I remember listening to the soundtrack for The Nutcracker when I was little. The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy was my favorite track, and I would sit in the living room in front of the CD player and replay it over and over. I didn't like the Arabian Dance though, I thought it was scary. Occasionally I'll hear a piece of classical music somewhere and feel deeply moved by it in some way, and then want to hear a bunch more classical music. I'm not sure if that really happens with other types of music so much, even though I listen to classical music pretty infrequently compared to other types. I want to do... something. I'd like to see the stars without light pollution, or walk barefoot on a beach with fine sand. And I want to lie on a smooth stone slab in the shade on a hot day. And feel a piece of warm metal in my mouth. I want to brush my lips against a piece of flannel... and lightly run my fingertip around the edge of someone's ear. I want to do some sensory things and focus on the feeling. Comment! (1) | Recommend! APL, APM Thursday, October 23, 2014 Comment! (2) | Recommend! Revisiting Thursday, October 23, 2014 I made some gifs from a game I have a certain fondness for, FOC/US. If I knew how to make nicer gifs I would've, but I only know how to take screenshots and put them together in GIMP, so this is what I ended up with. I don't feel like the choppiness detracts from the writing though. This is a game I've revisited several times since I first played it. Even though it's not one of the ones I think about most, it's stuck with me. In a post about game design, Felix Park, the creator of FOC/US, described his personal opinions about what he wants to do with his games. This was one of the things he said: "Games are not valuable in themselves, as objects. Like any other medium, games are a delivery system for experiences to be felt and thought about, whether it�s a beautiful minimally-interactive scene or that perfect, timeless one-in-a-million frag. The design of games centers around the design of experience. The value of games is found only in the transmitted experience to the player." I liked the way he worded it. Though I don't play a huge number of games, there are some that I've found deeply fulfilling, and I have a lot of respect for people who can make something that gets to me in that way. I'd like to create something that accomplishes that someday. --- Lately I've been thinking a lot about what I'm going to write for my next writing group meeting. Maybe I'll share it here when I finish it. Comment! (0) | Recommend! 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