You fail it!
Friday. 5.21.10 10:00 pm
I don't know what to do. I don't know how to handle the intricacies of life. I am going to FAIL at LIFE in the most embarrassing fashion possible.
I've screwed up scholarships.
I've screwed up relationships.
I'm working really hard on screwing up getting a job.
How do I expect to live alone?
How do I expect to stay organized and just keep track of things? How do I expect to pay for those things?
I'm just a charming mess. And I'm not even really that charming.
On one hand, this depression of sorts might be linked to my mom making me feel like total dick. Not A dick. Just. Dick.
On the other hand, I might just be dick.
Sunday. 5.16.10 10:39 am
Actually it's a book I have about a man named Colin with a dark past steeped in mystery and magic, and he has to deal with the forces of good and evil fighting over him for reasons he doesn't completely understand. It's a bit corny, but not too bad. I think that when two authors collaborate...well, let's just say I'm not a huge fan of it.
Is anyone here a fan of the band "fun."? Here's their myspace. I really love Be Calm.
Oh man, I've been on facebook so long that I almost forgot how to write HTML links. Gosh.
Speaking of weak programming skills, I have been enjoying Rainmeter very much. I plan on learning to make my own skins in that, but for now I'm happy using Omnimo and editing it a bit. My desktop looks sort of baller right now, not gonna lie.
Also, I finished the pig latin translator (did I already say that?) and now I really want to do a stutter and maybe even a Morse code translator. That could actually be useful...
My IB exams are over...now I only have a few normal end-of-year exams to do. It's hard to concentrate on the little homework I have left at this point. This cannot be a good way to start off college. I'll just have to figure it out.
This weekend has been pretty rad so far, but of course now it's Sunday and I have to DO WORK. Man. But this band is SO GOOD! Actually I'm only getting every other song on their myspace playlist, hahaha.
AND OH YEAH I have a job interview Monday. I am the last person I know to get a job. I feel like I'm failing at life or something. But anyway it's on Monday and I plan on being a lifeguard for real this time. Wish me luck! I have never done this before.
I am not going to lie. I am VERY disappointed about how the magazine turned out this year. I was SO EXCITED about it, remember? The layout was awesome, the cover was awesome, and most of the poetry and especially the art was fantastic. But now all these mistakes have come up (of course after we printed) and I'm not sure it's all the printer's fault. Some of it definitely is, though. All of our page layout elements are meant to be greyscale, even on the "color" pages (most pages are completely greyscale, even the art, in an effort to save money, so we have certain pages set aside to be with color). But on the color pages, our blacks are more like dark magenta or in some cases navy blue. What the heck. Also there are some details that seemed to have changed, like missing drop-shadows and THE LINES OF MY HAIKU BEING OUT OF ORDER. For real. OUT OF ORDER. I thought I was misrepresented when they changed my careful punctuation a few years ago, but now I see that even when I am on the staff I have to be wary of liberties taken with my poetry! And also one of my pictures was on a color page, but apparently we were wrong about that because it printed in B&W. On Tuesday I'm going to look through the PDFs we sent the printer and see how much of this is our fault and how much wasn't.
Anyway, now I am really only proud of the cover (even though they didn't use the right gloss on the cover so now it sucks up finger oils like mad). Most of the problems are little things that nobody would ever notice (except that haiku thing)...but those are exactly the mistakes that will cost the magazine a good rating at the competition next year. Dang itttt. I was so proud.
Now I'm all peeved again. Bah. I went swimming yesterday and it was quite a lot of fun. The weather was hot and perfect. I had to swim in my pants and then drive in my underwear because the whole thing was sort of a surprise to me. But that's part of the fun!
Ehhh. I've spent a while writing this. I'm out!
Passion Fruit Smoothie!
Thursday. 5.6.10 12:27 Am
Alright, so, I opened a new shampoo bottle just now, and it's scented "Passion Fruit Smoothie." I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've seen a bottle trying to pass off a taste as a scent. Because that is obviously a taste! There should be no difference between the smell of the fruit and the smoothie, so it MUST be a taste reference!
In either case, it smells like plain shampoo.
I wonder how inappropriate it would be for me to pass out Mother's Day cards to some girls at school. I'm not close friends with any girls who are pregnant, so that little joke is out.
Saturday I'm driving down to Columbia to watch my brother's track meet there. It will be rad! As long as I don't die or get lost or something.
I've always told people that, in the event that I was about to die and there was no way around it, I'd prefer to jump out of airplane, over the ocean, stark naked. This is still true. I think that would be possibly the greatest way to die.
I had two days off of school for an English IB exam and a Calculus AP exam. I am fairly confident with the English...the math, on the other hand, left me wondering about life, the universe, and everything. It was awful. I was completely and utterly ill-prepared, which is mostly my fault but was aggravated slightly by my class and teacher. Parts of it were beyond my grasp simply because I didn't know how to handle certain numbers (in some cases I could even remember DOING the lesson, but no dice!) but at least I knew what it was asking almost all of the time. And I figured out some stuff on the spot, like deriving a semicircle!
But yeah, I got a pretty bad score on that.
Tonight I decided that I wanted to converse with people on facebook in all caps. Here are some highlights.
LYING IN MY BED
LOLZ I KNOW
WHO DID YOU USE AS YOUR REFERENCE FOR YOUR LAUREL CREEK APPLICATION
IT ASKS FOR TWO REFERENCES.
NO PARENTS OR EMPLOYERS
I DID NOT HAVE TO EVEN FILL OUT AN APPLICATION I JUST CALLED UP THERE AND TOLD THEM I WANTED TO WORK HAHA
IS IT IMPORTANT
yes we are cleaning and going over policies and what not
but i mean they wont tell you no because you missed it. clay wont be able to make it
THAT IS A QUESTION
WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE A SHOUTING CONVERSATION
IT IS CERTAINLY USEFUL FOR SPICING UP LIFE
IT SEEMS LIKE AS GOOD A TIME AS EVER
IT IS FUN TO NOT USE PUNCTUATION EVEN WHEN IT IS INTEGRAL TO THE MEANING
LIKE WHEN AJ MENTIONED CLAY
AND I SAID CLAY BATES
BUT IT WAS A QUESTION NOT AN EXCLAMATINO
SO I HAD TO SAY THAT IS A QUESTION
JUST NOW WHEN I WAS QUOTING MYSELF
NEVER ADMIT TO BEING UNCOOL
YOU JUST BROKE RULE ONE
I ADMITTED NO SUCH THING
I AM THE COOLEST CAT ON THE BLOCK
YOU ARE NOT A CAT
I WOULD KNOW
BECAUSE I AM A CAT
CHECK IT OUT
SEE THERE IT IS
THAT DOESN'T REALLY WORK IN CAPS
NEITHER DOES YOUR MOM
IT IS AS IF A CAT IS BEING SURPRISED
OR RAPED IN AN ALLY
YES I DID
WHICH I GUESS STILL FALLS UNDER THE FIRST INSTANCE
YOU CAN IGNORE THE CRUDE COMMENT I MADE ABOUT YOUR MOM OKAY BUT MY CAT IMPRESSION IS GREAT
YOU HAVE BEEN MISSING OUT ON MY GOAT IMPRESSION
LET ME TELL YOU
IT IS BAAAAAD
YOU JUST MADE ME LAUGH
FOR REAL THAT IS PRETTY NEAT
YES FOR REAL
I HAVE NOT LAUGHED IN A LONG TIME WHILE TALKING TO YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL GIRL DRAMA
HEHE GIRL DRAMA
I AM NOT ALL GIRL DRAMA
I DO NOT THINK I HAVE MENTIONED GIRLS FOR A LONG TIME
YOU ARE ALSO FIVE PERCENT WATER
PRETTY SURE IT IS MORE THAN THAT
NOT WITH ALL THAT GIRL DRAMA YOU ARE PACKING
IT'S LIKE DRINKING ALCOHOL
IF YOU HAD A .95 BLOOD GIRL LEVEL I WOULD BELIEVE IT
I'VE BEEN HOLDING DOWN SHIFT THIS WHOLE TIME INSTEAD OF CAPS LOCKING WTF
I AM STILL WONDERING WHAT IS THIS DRAMA YOU SPEAK OF.
OH DAMN A PERIOD
SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THE GIRL DRAMA
I HONESTLY THINK YOU SAY THESE THINGS JUST TO RILE ME UP
YOU'RE ALL WOMEN BE HATEN ON MEEE
REMEMBER HOW PARANOID I AM.
HOLY CRAP IT'S A PERIOD
THAT IS NOT TRUE BECAUSE THAT IS NOT TRUE
WOMEN LOVE ME
WOMEN HATE YOU
AWW MAN THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A QUESTION TOO
HEY RYAN I AM HAVING SHOUTING CONVERSATIONS WITH KATIE AND AJ
I have an application on my mac desktop that allows me to look at every issue of science magazine, EVER
IT IS QUITE INVIGORATING
starting with 1880.
I LIKE MY STORY BETTER
do...do you need some water?
you sound like you're getting hoarse.
I JUST MADE KATIE LAUGH
SO I AM ON A ROLL
LET ME TELL YOU WHAT I TOLD HER
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT CATS
i really wish you had replied to my comment wiht
naaaahhhhhhhaahahahah (neighing like a horse)
wait, which katie
i know LOTS of katies
LOTS OF KATIES YOU HEAR
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT CATS
AND SHE SAID MEOW
way to not answer my question.
AND I TOLD HER THAT MEOWING DOES NOT REALLY WORK IN ALL CAPS
that wasnt even a skillful dodge.
YOU LIE OF COURSE THEY DO
WHO NEEDS SUBTLETY WHEN YOU CAN TYPE LIKE THIS
well. i have exams in the morning.
so, sleep well steve.
try not to yell in your sleep.
WHY WOULD I TRY THAT
IF I CAN YELL IN MY SLEEP I WILL TAKE FULL ADVANTAGE OF IT
did you consider that it might not be voluntray?
IT IS LIKE THE CLASSIC LIBRARY MISSPELLING
goodnight, one of the overflexed lungs and vocal chords.
Oh man. This is actually a lot of fun.
I have been using the straight-faced awkward approach a LOT lately. Talking about sex in youth group, for example. Now, to be clear, nobody in my youth group believes that sex itself is bad or taboo or anything. So certain discussions are allowed and even encouraged. But it's still sort of awkward, especially when both genders are present and we're talking about breast reductions.
Also, I was looking up the KIN phone today in school (apparently an awful phone) and some kid kept making jokes that I was looking up Ken from Barbie. He asked, "What were you and Ken doing last night?"
I looked him right in the eye and said, "Masturbating."
...so if anyone's wondering about my part in the current shoutbox conversation...yeah.
Monday. 5.3.10 7:53 pm
So basically every time I listen to one of my favorite songs I want to post a blog. And then I forget alllll about it.
Feelin' sort of mixed up right now. Same old story. Not to my liking at all.
Prom coming up- wait, what? EXAMS coming up. Huh. Prom was Saturday (and the Friday from the week before). OH YEAH ABOUT THAT. Um. I had a date this year. Go me? Yeah! It's pretty much a completely different experience. But I'm sure YOU know that!
Yes, you! Fourthwallwhat?
Instead of standing around by myself or creeping on my friends, I danced! There was still an issue when the DJ insisted on playing nothing but grind music, but at least I was awkward with a friend. Last week was the private school prom (Lauren had to "import" me). I think there were around 60 kids or something...pretty small. They tried to censor the music (it's a Christian school, which is sort of a joke,) but that didn't completely work. Afterwards Lauren, her friends Michelle and Katherine, and their three dates (myself included) planned to go bowling. But instead we sort of collapsed at Michelle's house until 2:30 in the morning, when I woke up long enough to drive Lauren and then myself home.
This past Saturday, however, was Prom at MY school. The beforehand was basically the same deal except with different people; lots of pictures, some car rides, and dinner. Except dinner sort of sucked and Lauren's dress had a small tear that was threatening to make her indecent. Luckily I plan on never going to that restaurant again and Mom threaded up the hole before we left to go eat.
...Wow, those ideas are completely in the wrong order.
There were a lot more kids, maybe two or three hundred. But the gym was more than big enough to handle us all...the music was about the same composition, but with much less censorship. I felt bad that we couldn't, er, participate in a lot of the...dancing? But Lauren and I sort of made up our own dance. And that was crazy.
And after THAT we headed to Meredith's house, which has a crazy backyard and a swimming pool. Even though it was kind of stuffy outside the water was about 68 degrees. We swam anyway...I and a few of the guys figured that it's the same temperature we swim at for school anyway. But we didn't stay in long because apparently nobody else is used to that. It was still nice to be woken up so thoroughly, though. I made some major splashes. Fun fun.
After we got settled in there was food and a campfire. This entertained us for a few hours. Eventually I retired to a tent and tried to go to sleep, but there were 6 guys and girls in there so we ended up talking past 5...and we woke up at 8 or so. Great time. Loved hanging out with those people.
...as of right now, I am extremely bored. My brother's playing xbox, my mom is in her room, I have exams tomorrow so of course I'm not studying, and the girl I was in the middle of a conversation with just STOPPED RESPONDING for like 15 minutes (she literally JUST answered! Creepy!). Nobody's on facebook. Seems like a good time for me to start READING THE BIBLE like I wanted to. Oh yeah. That's right! I thought of that right as it left my fingers.
Magic fingers, baby.
Also, can you tell I've been reading a LOT of Dinosaur Comics? I might have already pointed this out, but my writing style is visibly changed. If it wasn't so awesome I'd be worried that I'm so impressionable.
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