It's wearing me out.

I have the next four days completely mapped out.



Tomorrow I'm going to summer school, then hanging out with Yashvi all day, then going to The Bright House with Amy.

Friday I'm going to summer school, then hanging out with Adaly all morning, then going to Brownfield to see the chiropractor, then getting a new camera(!).

Saturday I'm spending the day with Amy, because she's going out of town for two weeks on Sunday, and also getting a haircut.

Sunday I'm going to church, then lunch, then completely cleaning up my room. Also doing a bunch of laundry, hopefully, cause I really need to.



Yeppp.

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It's wearing me out.

I have the next four days completely mapped out.



Tomorrow I'm going to summer school, then hanging out with Yashvi all day, then going to The Bright House with Amy.

Friday I'm going to summer school, then hanging out with Adaly all morning, then going to Brownfield to see the chiropractor, then getting a new camera(!).

Saturday I'm spending the day with Amy, because she's going out of town for two weeks on Sunday, and also getting a haircut.

Sunday I'm going to church, then lunch, then completely cleaning up my room. Also doing a bunch of laundry, hopefully, cause I really need to.



Yeppp.

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sort of.

Yesterday, after waking up at 12:30 (thank god I got to sleep in!) and going home, I decided I wanted a face mask. So I went to the store. (I promise this is relevent.) I spent a lot of time looking for a face mask, and finally found one. My friend Nick Tidwell works at the store, and I was really hoping he would carry my groceries out, even though it was only a face mask and some makeup and I could have done it myself.

He did. He didn't even know it was me, because I was wearing my hat, but there he was.

After he took my groceries to my car, he told me to call him to hang out sometime. So naturally, when I couldn't find anyone to hang out with last night, other than Nathan, who I knew just wanted to make out, I texted Nick.

He came to SB's, and then we went to YamaGata because I hadn't eaten all day and was craving Asian food. It was really good. And expensive. And I planned on paying for mine myself, but then they put it together on one tab, so he payed for it for me. Cause he's a gentelman. And then his girlfriend came and I finally got to meet her, after they've been dating for 7 months.

I've always felt kind of possesive over Nick--who hasn't?--and just didn't like her. But she's sweet. I thought she would be one of those annoying stupid girls, but we actually have a really similar sense of humor. And she has a freaking adorable lisp. I like them together.

Anyways, she had to be home at 10:15 so she left, and my car was still at SB's, so we left and went in that direction, but while we were on the way, my mom called and told me I didn't have to be home until 11:15. Idk what's up with all the 15-afters, but it's alright. So we decided to go sit on these benches around a flagpole at an elementary school.

And it started raining.

"Hannah," he said, "it's raining. And there's these benches. And it probably couldn't get more romantic than this. And I'm with you instead of Caitlin."

"Nick," I said, "I'm with you instead of Aaron."

"Hannah," he said, "You are officially my best friend. You're the only one who ever calls me to do stuff, and you're sitting in the rain with me."


Obviously, that was all paraphrased. But the point of the matter is, we're now best friends.








So I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before, but I've recently fell in love with piano artists. I mean, Elton John and Billy Joel have always been pretty high on my list of favorite artists, and I've liked Regina Spektor for a while, but I put "I Found A Reason - Cat Power" into Pandora after watching V for Vendetta, and I've found the most amazing music. I mean, I still have Ray Lamontagne and Amos Lee and Kimya Dawson keeping me hanging onto the folk scene, but. Yeah.


I fell asleep so early last night. I got home around 11:20-ish and went straight to my room and read a bit for Aca Deca, but didn't feel like high-lighting anymore, so I started reading the Chronicles of Narnia. I only got through a chapter of that, and turned off my light, but I was still texting Aaron. He probably thinks I'm a sex fiend now, because I was trying to be sarcastic but he didn't really get it, and I couldn't figure out how to explain it because I was half-asleep already. So I just fell asleep, and I had a text from him this morning that I replied to that probably just dug myself deeper into the sex fiend persona. -sighhh-





I told my mom about my tattoo idea, and she didn't like it at all.

"Tattoos are supposed to enhance your beauty, especially the curves, which is where you want to put it. How would a bunch of inanimate objects inhance your beauty?"



My b, mom, my b.

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Not having to call my dad to pick me up from Amy's today freaked me out. Because I had to actually think to get home.




I made some bread at Amy's house the other night and brought about a quarter of a loaf home today. I just made some toast out of it.


Oh. My. Goodness.

Best toast I've ever made.

It was muffin bread, and I cut off a big hunk of it, and I put butter on it and toasted it, and then I put a bunch of peach jelly on it. It was delish.




I want to see Ghostland Observatory live, real bad.

I also want a tattoo real bad. Last night we were talking about tattoo ideas and I came up with like, the BEST one.

So, on my side, starting on my hip or somewhere around there, I would have a stack of objects. Just like, random objects. A lamp, a record, a bowling ball, a glass bottle, a teapot, a flashlight, etc, going all the way up my side. I was thinking about having the lamp as the bottom one that everything's balancing on, but then I remembered this really cool picture Buddy drew in graphic com of an elephant, and how I wanted to get it as a tattoo, so I thought everything could be balancing on the elephant.

I think it sounds so awesome. But then there's also the whole what if it gets cumbersome thing. Or like, what if I start liking this really nice guy and we start dating and then we go swimming or something and he sees my tattoo and he's like "I always promised myself I'd never date someone with a tattoo... bye..."

I know that's pretty obscure and stuff, but it could happen. I mean, if it was on my side it wouldn't really prevent me from getting a job, as you have to be clothed for one of those, and I've become a big fan of one-piece swimsuits, so it wouldn't be that apparent even when I went swimming. So yeah.


I really want that tattoo now.

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Make a wish.






I wish I had synesthesia.

I do have a very slight form of it called Personification, but it's not the form I want, and it's actually really annoying. But it does help me remember my multiplication tables.



Hanging out with Aaron one on one Wednesday. It'll be the first time in like a week and a half. Hope I'm not really really awkward again.


I think this summer I'm just more awkward than usual. I guess it's hormones...


I'm getting really brown. My car windows aren't tinted, so it's easy to tan while I'm driving.

I plan on not wearing jeans at all this summer, unless we go to Colorado or Evansville or somewhere cold for vacation. I'm pumped.


I feel really petty and kind of like a freshman, but last night I was perusing through myspace, looking for something good to listen to. Aaron was on my top friends, not that high, but I clicked on his just to see his song. I didn't think he really used myspace much, we only really talk over facebook as far as the online communication, so I just hit play and went back to reading about synesthesia. After the song was over I went back to myspace, and just happened to glance at his top friends. I'm number 3.

I turned so red and couldn't stop giggling. I know it's dumb and superficial, but it's like. Idk. It's like a statement.
I moved him up to four. Ha.



At the show/party thing Thursday night we were sitting on the grass, and this senior came up and was just like "What is this?" and started laughing. Not in a mean way, but like, a shocked way. So I guess just the fact that we were sitting together made a statement too? I don't know.



I know lately all my updates or what ever have been not-so-subtly mentioning him, but I'm trying to get better about it. I just hate talking about him to Amy and Yashvi all the time, cause I don't want them to get tired of it, and talking about it to Stephen would be weird because Aaron is Stephen's older brother's best friend... I guess I could get some good insight if I wanted, but Stephen would probably tell me that I was a whore. Just because that's what he does.




I'm always so out of the loop in the summer. I wouldn't really mind, if people didn't talk about the things that I wasn't aware of. It hasn't happened yet, but I'm sure that it will.

Oh well.



I have things on my mind that I can't really talk about. So I think I'll skip the risk of pouring out someone else's secrets and end this.

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Bayless and I talked about Aca Deca through the whole thing.

I'm pretty sure my face burnt to a crisp just on the walk back to my car.

Went to a grad dinner for Aaron afterwards. It was me and his friend Brandon and him, and then the rest of his family. He wasn't having any fun, so the three of us left after an hour. I was less awkward around him than last time, though.

Oh yeah. Last time I was awkward. Lunch was like the most awkward experience ever. I knew him and Preston, and the rest of the people were seniors I'd pretty much never met. And I was awkwardly not eating. So I felt dumb.

Then that night I went to a party and Aaron and I hung out towards the end. And I quote: "I've never met anyone as awkward or uncomfortable as you."

Yeah. Which is weird, because while my personality is pretty awkward, I'm not usually a socially awkward person. Bayless pointed this out to me yesterday. I think Thursday was just a really off day for me.


Parker's been calling me. Called me Tuesday night twice. Called me last night, but I was asleep, and I thought I was saying hello, or at least making some noise, but he hung up, and I texted him about it this morning and he said that I wasn't saying anything.
Idk. I need to talk to him about being friends again. Idk.


I would like for my parents to call and tell me where we're eating, because I'm hungry.

I didn't have breakfast yesterday. I had ice cream for dinner. Then I got to Aaron's grad dinner late because it said it started at 7:00 on Facebook, so there wasn't any food. Then I went over to Yashvi's and her mom brought down a bowl of icecream pretty much randomly. Then my dad called me while I was on my way home and asked me to come to SB's and sit with him, because he put up a bunch of his paintings there. So he bought me an iced-blended-Sugar-Brown's-Latte-with-whipped-cream, which is basically like ice cream too.


Lunch finally!

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