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Saturday. 5.21.11 12:37 am
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Monday. 5.9.11 3:01 pm

Okay, so you know that moment when you're up at 3 a.m., and you want to have a good conversation that will refresh your mind and keep you up for a few hours, but no one talk-to-able is on, so you start reading Psychology Today articles?

Maybe not, okay, but I was at that point, last night.

There was this article on how we coddle kids too much. I read it, and, up until a certain point, I was glad to see that point of view published, because people do tend to stay too connected to their kids.

But, then there was this whole thing about how we tell kids they can do anything (along with grade inflation, hello), AND THEY CAN'T.

This kind of honestly blew my mind.

See, I'd been going through life with this attitude about careers and how, if I work hard enough, I can be anything. I'm seeing, now, that this was kind of crazy. Not because I'm not bright (I don't especially have a solid judgement on that, in reference to statistics, but I would assume that I'm not entirely dull, in any case), but because some things just aren't my forte. Sure, I COULD succeed in subjects I don't naturally do well in, but do I WANT to waste my time in classes that could cause my GPA to plummet and cause me to use HOURS upon hours everyday just trying to keep up?

(Just so you know, this whole subject makes me flinch. I was brought up by a school system that plugged students full of this You Can Reach The Stars stuff, so I'm still having some trouble with my dissonance.)

It doesn't make sense. It really doesn't. And I figure this out after taking a chemistry course and HATING it. Right now, I'm leaning so hard towards behavioral sciences and mathematics, but I'm changing my major to undeclared until I can get a handle on my interests and strengths (probably by reviewing what classes I elect to take). Much less kooky. Much more me, to be completely neutral until I fall in love.

Although...Araam and I were talking, last night, because I sent him an article that related to me, and suddenly I told him that, if I worked in the psychology field, I would work a lot more with parent-child relationships and improve that field.

That's the first time I've ever had a specific plan for ANYTHING, career and education-wise.


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Monday. 4.25.11 8:52 pm
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Wednesday. 4.20.11 11:30 pm


So. So!

Meagan, inhuman, and I are going down to the beach for my birthday, this weekend. YOU CAN'T COME. Except in spirit!

I discussed trying oysters with Meagan. She sounds reluctant but up for it, for the sake of my birthday. So we'll either do that, or sushi. OR BOTH. I looked at the oyster deal and it sounds like a smart lunch choice. Just get half a dozen for six bucks and share them. ...I've never tried oysters, either!


It's just that silly nervousness, you know? The first time I tried sushi, I grabbed a HUGE dose of wasabi, not knowing what it was. My mom DIDN'T STOP ME! So I ended up gagging and generally having a hard time, all while trying to NOT make a scene.

It took me a few years to try that again. Hopefully oysters will be less crazy, since now I'm older and I eat steamed zucchini like an adult.

And asparagus, yum.


Okay so I have to say. I think I've been attacking the college situation the wrong way. See, I always have a plan, but I always end up figuring out that that plan ISN'T FOR ME. This January, I had ABSOLUTELY NO PLAN. And, for some reason, everything I started up then is working out for me.

So I'm sticking with my planless plan. I'm going the undeclared route until I KNOW what I want or am forced into choosing. Till then, I'm going to take the core classes and the ones I gravitate towards. I assume a pattern will develop and I'll know what I want.

(I think I already know what I want, but let's not make sudden moves. Life is gradual. There is no sense in rushing into ANYTHING.)


Just sometimes it seems like everything is going by SO QUICKLY. I've been like one of those dog owners who rushed to put the food dog because the dog makes a big fuss. I get spooked!

Meowmeowmeowmeow that is all.

I have a project to work on!


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