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green cupcakes
Sunday. 11.7.10 9:48 pm

Guys, yesterday was seriously weird. I invited people over for like five thirty, yeah? I picked up chocolate bars and asked others to bring some yummy stuff, too, and made green food-dyed cupcakes (and forgot the butter, yikes). Everything was all ready on time!

All right so I was petting the neighbor's cat on my front stoop around 5:10 (because I saw it asking to come in) when some random car-ish thing pulls up and parks oddly, close to where my friend Seth usually parks his zippy little car. And I'm sitting here thinking, Who the heck's driving that car, and where's Seth going to park (because Seth has parked there literally every time he's been at my house except once when we had to hide his car to surprise a friend)? The guy had short hair so I thought maybe Neb borrowed a car or that he told Danny to come (which, thinking back, made no sense).

Holy moly, you guys. It was Seth. He chopped all his hair off! AND HE WASN'T DRIVING HIS USUAL CAR!

So then everyone else was really SUPER late. He and I hunted for sticks for a campfire, hung out, hunted for MORE sticks, and still had time to discuss how lame people were being over frosting cupcakes. People finally started showing up at like SEVEN. And I didn't even get to talk to him about some serious We Need To Talk sorts of things!

What's up with that! All night my intuition wasn't screaming loudly enough. Bummer. We didn't even really get a campfire, after all that. It was so cold!

Anyway, what else.

Oh, we ended up watching Gamer. It was eh. I didn't mind watching it, but it seemed like the plot moved too quickly and that not enough aspects of the plot had explanation. If they'd taken another half hour, it might have been easier to watch. And, hey, I'm all for movies that challenge the mind and make it more difficult to watch. If it makes me think, that's fine. This isn't that type of movie, though.

Plus, I feel like the nudity wasn't used tastefully. Even though the scenes were supposed to convey a dirty degradation of society, I felt like they could have handled those particular scenes a bit more artfully. The line between "dirty photos" and art is pretty thin, I get it, but.

Still.

Ummm...!

That's it!

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the market.
Monday. 11.1.10 2:45 pm

So my friend Sarah decided that she was going trick-or-treating. We're both quite blatantly eighteen, so there was that obvious worry about people asking the dreaded, "Aren't you a bit old to be trick-or-treating?"

I told her, "When they ask if you're a bit old to trick-or-treat, ask them, 'Aren't you a bit old to be ALIVE?'"

Even my mom appreciated the quip.

She thought it was tasteless, but she still appreciated it.

Sarah picked me up at my mom's house and we met her boyfriend, Joey, and her boyfriend's neighbor, Buddy, in her neighborhood. Both of them are nice, but I've never really spent time with either.

So we hit four houses, then gave up because it was SO late and went to McDonald's for some food. We sat there and talked for more than an hour, then went back to her house and talked even more. THEN, she dropped the boys off after looking for deer and we talked alone the whole way to my house.

That was oddly nice. I've known Sarah for a good nine or so years, now, and we've been on and off good friends.

Just...

It's nice to have My People. You know? Friendship is sort of fantastic, and I'm always thankful for those I have to talk to.

Plus, guess what! Her boyfriend is actually nice and interesting, which I never knew (because I didn't ever really talk to him)! They're almost to three years, so that's super exciting news!


Okay and also. I've been trying to find a job and the search SUCKS.

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lunatic
Tuesday. 10.26.10 6:47 pm

My dad wanted me to see a psychiatrist after I withdrew (no penalty) from college. Today I finally went to the one my dad found for me; the guy is supposed to be one of the best diagnosticians in the area.

He told me three things:

1) He isn't worried about my anxiety problems. Basically, he told me that it would be a waste to treat me for something that rarely happens, and only stays for a couple of minutes.

2) He has a couple of ideas, but in general, he's unsure of how to treat what IS affecting me. Mostly because he isn't sure what that thing affecting me IS. He told me to go home and do some research, then come back to him with my thoughts.

3) I'm controlled with my emotions to the point where it makes his job more difficult. People only tell me that when they actually listen.


My dad laughed when I told him that his recommended psychiatrist kind of sent me away with a shrug of his shoulders. He told me he wondered if this was the first patient he didn't know how to treat.



I'm almost kind of proud of myself.


AND HOW ARE YOU?

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the first of three.
Monday. 10.25.10 1:26 am
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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