Gimme a call
personal growth [t]
Hello Kitty [t]
Asian racism [t]
Funny thing is...
Tuesday. 1.17.12 11:06 pm
Right after I posted, she had a reaction that was basically this:
No! You can't go anywhere without my permission!
Again, I kept quiet and avoided speaking on the subject.
Unfortunately, I'm short on time and leaving in a week...
I really want to tell her before I get on the plane...
I can't just go with an email/text/phone call...
But I'm afraid she'll stop me from going to the airport.
Chinese New Year is next week.
What timing, eh?
But I don't make the deadlines and I've
already pushed back the date as far as possible so
I can spend the first few days of new year at home.
Plus there's so much to be done before I go!!! >.<
Aaaagggghhh, I'm already stressed for time and a growing to do list.
Wish me luck!
Long time no see!
Saturday. 1.14.12 11:25 pm
I hope your lives have been satisfactory thus far! =)
I have returned after a very long absence (feels like years)
because I was about to turn off my new (somewhat, it's been a few months)
laptop when I thought of the 'Tang and realized I was overdue for a visit.
My plane tickets are booked,
the date is looming very near,
and there are some loose ends to be tied up before I go.
I finally got up the courage to let her (for 'Tangers, it's you-know-who) know.
At first, it was like ice hitting hot oil
but then I didn't mention it again for a while until this week.
She's okay with it. Kinda. I won't be gone for long (it's just a quick trip)
and no one knows what will happen afterwards.
I'm of the belief that everyone finds their happiness,
the happy ending that suits them best.
One door closes, another will open--perhaps at a most unexpected place.
And I'm okay with that. I haven't explained everything
but I think she understands.
Thank you to those who commented on the previous post
because they made me feel very lucky to have such great cyber friends. ;)
'Till next time~
Thursday. 9.8.11 9:32 am
I'm at a crossroads
about to make
the most important decision in my life thus far.
How far will I go?
The farthest I can!
Will my dreams come true?
One step at a time and we shall see!
I have hope like I never had before.
It makes me excited!
I am eager to get started.
But to do so means leaving the life I've always known behind.
My stomach is in knots because I know I will travel this road alone for a time.
Most of all, after all these years of trying to be a good daughter to earn my mother's love, I must leave her.
She does not support my dream. She does not believe I will succeed.
In many ways she is the source of constant negativity in my life.
But I do not hate her for it.
I am not leaving because of it; that is not a good enough reason.
I am leaving because this is what I want and I need to take responsibility for my life.
Will you give me your blessings?
Will you wish me a fair journey?
Will I have you to come back to when I need encouragement or just to talk?
I think it would be nice to have you be a part of my journey, however large or small a part.
I have no fear of failure.
There is only one choice when we are out of choices, and that is to continue living. Only this will give us more choices, different roads to take.
After I have learned and lost,
I will choose another.
After I have learned and gained,
I am strengthened, replenished, and ready to continue traveling.
I know hard times await me.
I am ready to do my best and work through it.
My journey starts today.
Part I begins.
Monday. 8.8.11 3:09 pm
Please refer to this public post on G+: https://plus.google.com/116222833568410151476/posts/Ucv4VShtdrt
It's not necessary to understand my entry but it was my jumping point so...copy 'n paste the url please! I can't make the link button work for Chrome for some reason. Sorry. =/
"Personal experience and seemingly random encounters are incredibly informative. There is so much to be learned about a population no matter if it is niche, city-wide or more extensive. It's hard to understand people (in general or specifically) if our daily lives are just brushed off as random coincidences.
I like asking questions. I have been on the receiving end of many a judging look or bewildered comment from my peers after asking a simple direct question. I rarely receive an answer without awkwardness or repeating the question.
On the other hand, there is a risk of thinking too much. "If it's not a random then..." can lead to conspiracy theories (My phone is tapped!) as well as self-delusion (They did this because they hate me for my talent! Jealousy is just sooo ugly.) These can lead to misunderstandings that may or may not be rectified; e.g. creating broken homes, hurting a significant other/friend or getting fired. I think the boundary is easier to spot this way: if it's too outlandish and there isn't enough or any evidence to support it, back away and don't entertain the idea."
p.s. As you can see, I've kind of decided to post both here and there. My main concern is that what happened on FB may or may not happen on G+. Honestly, I trust Google more than FB but it CAN happen. Namely, something that we thought would be private can become public because of some idiot's error. I believe the incident was that FB allowed one's friends to access private messages (or was it chats). That would not be fun. G+ is linked to me, the REALITY'S ME. This is not, thankfully.
Which brings me to...@MIDDAYMOON: WAS THAT AN INSULT? YO, WATCHA MEAN BY THAT?!
'Tang or G+? Dilemma
Sunday. 8.7.11 5:01 pm
Remember how I said G+ makes blogging redundant? I still have an undeniable & irrevocable loyalty to the 'Tang. *But* it's much more convenient to blog there than here and it is such a temptation to do so. A large part is the ease of using G+'s mobile app versus the navigation of 'Tang on my phone. I spend much more time on my phone than I do on my laptop.
There are some things that I cannot mention or discuss, even for the sake of intellectual exchange, to anyone in my daily reality. I know you guys are here and I am grateful. =) That is why I am torn about the idea of using G+ exclusively.
Posted on both 'Tang & G+
What should I do?
Friday. 7.8.11 1:33 pm
Okay, so I just invited a few NuTangers to G+! HOORAY! *me excited* There is so much going on in G+, it's getting better and better everyday, the people are grrrreat, and I just can't wait to share it with you guys and the world!
Not everyone though. Current G+ers are mature & intelligent. I really don't want to watch this utopia descend into the Facebook abyss once it is officially opened. I would be happy to have certain people stay on Facebook.
What I am apologizing about:
I realized that inviting someone automatically lets them know my email address. I am...a bit uncomfortable with sharing that beyond NuTangers that I've known for a while. Yes, that means I didn't invite a few people who asked for an invite. >.< I'm very sorry! If any of the people I just invited are okay with it and want to invite the two people I didn't, please comment below so I can let them know. Or something.
Again, I am very very veryveryveryvery sorry. =(
Invites for G to the Plus
Sunday. 7.3.11 7:38 pm
I need your gmails in order to send out invites. Note me now! Runnnnnz! Oopz, wrong way.
Fun stuff. Copy & paste this to take a look: plus.google.com
Me likey so far! Hangout sounds awesome, can't wait to try that out! But I need you guys so pleeeeaaaazzzzzeee grant my wish.
(Why am I using z's? I have no idea. Just felt like being teenager-y, I suppose.)
I also really like Sparks which reminds me of Pulse. I was looking for a desktop version at one point because I liked it so much. I now have a desktop version! =) But better bc some aspects of Pulse annoys me.
**Disclaimer - There is no guarantee that you will receive an invitation immediately. In fact, that is impossible. Especially with the amount of people clamoring for invites. Check your invite status at the website above. It will either allow you to set up (a.k.a. update your Google Account name, etc.) or have a "Keep me posted" button for you to sign up with a statement on the bottom, something like "If you have an invite, we are currently exceeding capacity. Check again later." Please allow a few days before asking for my head. Thank you!**
p.s. Again, I don't know why. Just felt like it.
Saturday. 7.2.11 9:46 pm
I had an entry about the beginning of 21st year but I haven't finished it yet. In the meantime...
I finally got into Google Plus! Let me know if you guys want invites. =)
Already downloaded the native Android app. Can't wait to get started! Of course, I need more people in my circles for that to really happen. ;)
So long, farewell!
Was supposed to post this earlier. =P
UPDATE: I dropped my phone into a sink full of water. -.-;;; I swiped it out quickly and it was still on/working after. It's now in a baggy of grain and will probably stay that way for the next 2-3 days.
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