I'm in my EM class now, really sian, coz i think the teacher really buay kan, then the stuff he say are practically redundant....Really, i have no idea why i even make myself come for such a stupid class when i could be dozing at home or playing pool with my frens somewhere...
Wah Sian!!

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Shit, its nearly six in the afternn and i juz finished some project stuff, was planning to go pia for FM test tmr, but now, damn, i'm too freaking tired...the mere thought of gg thru notes makes me sick now...SIAN!!!

Anyway, i have pretty much come to the conclusion that i am gg to flunk the FM test tmr even if i study thru the nite, which is not quite possible, hah...so there's really no pt in sitting here and writing this entry, maybe i juz wan to vent some frustrations...haha...so well, think i'll juz pray for a miracle and hope God, whichever God that may be, comes thru for me, a prick who has nv prayed in all his life...lol...

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Change...something that everyone and everything is bound to go thru many times in a lifetime...something so complicated that we sometimes dun even understand it ourselves~

Recently, I read in a friend's blog that she's changing, and for the worse too, I shall not go into details, but from this, I have come to realise the significance of change myself.

Throughout my 19 years of life, I have changed alot, more often than not for the worse, this is a fact. As such, I actually want to make changes to myself for the better, but there are just too many things to do at the same time that I have actually managed to confuse and stressed up myself up juz thinking bout them...the more I think, the more sian I get, so I better stop thinking anymore and juz do it.

For a start, its definitely my AP that I gotta change..Although this does not come as very fresh news, I finally realise the impact of my AP on my daily life and most importantly on work and entry into its society in the not-so-far-off future. Time and time again, I have told myself to change, yet time and time again I have failed...the answer to which I have totally no idea at all.

I have also realised that I have done many things in during my life that I shouldn't be proud of at all, yet I do not yet have any much proud accomplishments yet to counter these negative elements of guilt in me...the answer, I told myself, is to change, aspects of my life, how I talk, conduct myself, etc. Yet , am I able to accomplish all that I set out to do? I seriously have not much confidence in that.

Hur hur, I seem to be rambling on incoherently the more I write, so I think I shld stop for now, after all, I can't even recall what drove me to write this entry. But one thing is for certain, I'll definitely change, and to a better version of my current self. So there, to all my friends out there, look out for a better me yar!! LOL.

Alucard Von Nosferatu Hellsing

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Hur hur, been really tiring this week...first, monday nearly fight with my bd grp mate over some minor stupid issue...den had to stay up study for mc test today, coz tue i working...den ytd, again stay up until 3 study for mc test, coz i only got home at 11 after work...den had to look thru the survey questionnaire for bd that my grp ppl send to me...spent half an hr editing it...so end up 12mn den start studying mc....fuck...really tired liao...

Worse, today i wake up at 830, and mc test is at 9...now this may not seem so bad if i was living in jurong or bk batok ya, but suay suay i live north side lor, yishun no less...

well, wad to do...showered and changed in record time, took a cab to sch...on the way still stuck at upper bk timah...sian...heng i got to sch in time for the test coz the lect start the test late...haha...heng i last nite got study, at least i think the test still can make it...

anyway, was supposed to take my mom out for dinner at some fancy restaurant coz her bday on sat, but when i got home an hr ago, was so damned shag that i went straight to slp and told my mom the dinner had to take a raincheck, i take her out another time, now tt i woke up, feeling quite bad pang sei my mom lidat...hur hur...niways, nvm tt...there's always the next time~

Provided i can find time next wk la, coz next wk really so hectic tt i think abt it only tao tia~ so i'm not gg to think abt it at all, juz take one step at a time, c what happens lor...sian...plus, now i am damned broke, spent most of my itp pay liao, if the samsung job nv tio, really can go eat grass liao...f..

think ttz abt it for now...will update when necessary~
Alucard Von Nosferatu Hellsing

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or rather, the ppl and mgmt there sucks!! WTF, tell me go down fill in some form so that they can proceed with my last payment,turn out is becoz they misplaced my application form and they need my particulars again. nnbcb!! Waste 1.5 hr of my bloody time commuting to and from suntec!! Talk about irresponsibility and incompetence!! I think these ppl can really score an all time high at these fields!!

And to think they fired me for my attitude!! Theirs isn't much better at all!! When I popped by the store just now to do that mindless thing that they asked me down to...none of my ex- colleagues even acknowledged my presence!! Whatever happened to that "smile warmly at all who enter the store crap" that they (the incompetent mgmt) 've been drumming into me all the time!!! As if not being acknowledged by those dipshits there wasn't bad enough, when I approached my ex- colleagues to ask abt wad form I had to fill in, they all replied with those one-word-monotone answers and tried to siam me!! Like I'm some plague to be avoided like that!!

Sure sure, I noe that my lousy attitude gotta have sth to do with it, but I dun really see the need for them to treat me this lousily, even if I gave them attitude before and I'm no longer working there!! WTF!!! these ppl really are fucked up!! Damn it!! I'm glad that I'm no longer with this fucked up company, otherwise, I fear I would have been poisoned by their vindictive venom as time pass on!!! WHY DUN U IDIOTS GO FUCK THE WALL!!! GO TO HELL AND NV COME BACK!! The next time I'm there I'll make sure that I give them a HELL of a time!! And I'm not being vindictive, I'm juz giving them a taste of their own medicine!! FUCK IT!!

Alucard Von Nosferatu Hellsing

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listening to: maroon5
mood: fucking sian

damn, after like 2 weekends of slacking at home, the boredom has finally set in...how ironic, last time when I used to work weekends at g2 'fore i got fired, I lamented that I was too busy or tired and wadever else....Now, I'm sitting here, looking at the screen and writing this pointless entry, supremely bored...

Actually, its not tt I got nth to do at all, come to think of it, I got tons of things to do, the numerous projects, which I am currently pretty damned fucking confused with, so I dun wan to think abt them, and not to mention all the tutorials for next week and the MC test next wk which I haven't studied for~MC...siao la, for the past four weeks, I zhao the lect twice, the other 2 times I was there, I was only present physically, my mind was somewhere else entirely...So, to sum it up, i have no fucking idea what MC is about and I think I am gg to flunk the test come wednesday....sian...really sian....

Later still have to go down to g2 to fill in some stupid particulars form or else the bastards wun proceed with my last payment...how fucking stupid....fire me liao still wan to make so much trouble for me...nbcb!! go fuck urselves la!! Still meeting terence afterwards to go gym, coz I've been gg out for supper alot the past week, making myself even more unfit than I already am....haha

Hope I can land the job for the samsung promoter when I go for the interview next week... coz it pays good, and if I do land the job, probably I can also get that slide up phone which I want, at a nifty discounted rate...haha..

Ok, I'll end my ramblings for today here then... got to go prep for gym le...

Alucard Von Nosferatu Hellsing

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