got some most unexpected haul of ang pows.

relatives- no suprises there.. the minimal amt

now, at work, thats where the the mother load is. from pple i haven't seen, talked to or even heard of. and the ang bows were mailed via internal mail systems from Hong Kong, Taiwan and from the pple working upstairs.

friends hse - 0.. i dun do visiting. save the akward moments.

feels weird u know, to go to someone's hse with the obvious intent to get money from them AND they know it.

hmm... lets just say the angbows from EACH office is greater than the sum of all my relatives' angbows add together.

too tired. cont tml or sth

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its the chinese new year.

with every passing year it gets more and more meaningless and painful to drag myself thru the new year holidays.

cannot fathom:

how people can sprout new year greetings like they mean it. At least it always sounds hollow when i try it.

how u are forced to meet all the members of your family and extended family and the entire network of families because they are you uncle's wife's nephew's daughter. and then meet ya girlfren's (boyfriend's) uncle's wife's nephew's daughter.

why must i lug around mandarin oranges that no one really wants.

and how all unmarried people are trying to visit as many people as possible so as to get ang baos. granted that its really good money that 2 lines of greetings and a pair of oranges gets u a fairly good chance its at least a $4 bucks angbao, but still somhow i dun see any significance -- see above reasons.

and of coz the relatives will feel obliged to give ya a nicer angbao, even tho a) u might not be nessecarily nicer to them, b) they might not feel the compeling need to be nicer to you

so wat for?

tho of coz


i may be completely missing the point.

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i'm in an extremely grouchy mood

din help that first thing in the morning i got scolded for a perfectly innocent remark, i made abt my sis's new year clothes last nite. i just said it was too loose, and that was all i said n the next morning all my sis had to do was complain to my dad saying i am evil, adding some tears for dramatic effect. and i got scolded.

and did i mention that last nite, she claimed "i saw more clothes den u ever did" and she slammed the door with a "fuck off"?

gross injustice if u ask me.


anyways...

i hate reunion dinners.

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I desperately need a remedy to

a) stop carelessness
b) calm nerves
c) slow down
d) and stop scaring myself silly

anything along the lines of killing myself need not apply

stressed

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