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- Kid at heart.
- Indecisive.
- Stubborn.
- Adventurous.
- Movie junkie.
- Sarcastic.
- Spontaneous.
- Friendly.
- Fun.
- Selective hearing.
- Easily amused.
- Insomniac.

NuTangmember since July 15, 2003

Mercedes Lim
09/25/17 - 11/28/08
I love you grandma.
Anberlin - Dismantle.Repair.
"Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers. You just breath deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed, but sometimes the pain gets you where you least expect it. Hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it and life always makes more."

"Forgive and forget. That's what they say. It's good advice, but it's not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back. When someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores are never settled, old wombs never heal, and the most we can hope for is that one day we'll be lucky enough to forget."
this is reality.
Friday. 10.23.04 10:46 pm
I told myself I wasn't going to cry. I didn't cry during the prayer or anything. I just had my head down most of the time, but once the prayer ended and they were letting everyone go see Joel in his casket I started getting nervous. I walked with Phillip and as soon as we got halfway down the aisle I was getting scared and I started to tear up. Each step closer I squeezed the life out of Phillip's hand, not even kidding. There was like 4 people ahead of us and that's when I couldn't help it. The tears just kept on coming and like honetly just remembering seeing Joel in his casket makes me cry as of now. I had my head down and the first thing I saw was the rosary in his hands, that's when I looked at his face. He looked so calm and peaceful as if he was just sleeping. Fuck. I can't believe he's gone. I know I wasn't all that close with him, but dude I miss him already. Just seeing him lay there.. i'm speechless. All it brings is just tears to my eyes. After I gave Jeremi and Juni a hug and I was just crying, up until we were already outside. It hurts that someone as wonderful as Joel had to simply give up. Everyone loved him and he was always a positive person and his friends are lucky they had a friend like him. And now he's watching over everyone as of now. =] God Bless you Joel and the Rafael Family. <3

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you're in my prayers..
Tuesday. 10.19.04 9:44 pm
R.I.P. Joel Rafael *08/15/86 -10/18/04

It was a tragic way to die. I still can't believe you're actually gone and did this to yourself. I know we weren't close, but you leaving was a big reality check for me. You made me think of how much I take things for granted and any of it could be gone in an instant. I should've realized it on my own, but something horrible like this had to happen. I know you'll be happy where you are. Your friends and family miss you a lot. Things won't be the same, but I know you would want everyone to move on. You'll never be really gone until you're actually forgotten, but it won't happen because we'll all keep you close to our hearts.

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