So I'm taking a break from playing Halo3 cause I'm starting to feel nauseous! Hahah. Yeah, I'm not much of a gamer. ): I try, but RPG games really aren't my thing. They usually give me headaches from trying to figure out what shit to do and from wandering all over the place. I like Halo though. It's fun.

Anyway, I am at Matt's apartment all by myself. Earlier today, I just babysat my bro cause he had a fever and didn't go to school. My mom came home around 3:30 and she said she felt sick too, so her and my bro both took a nap around 4:30 and I left to go to Matt's to drop off an ice pack that he wanted to use.

So I get there and we hang as usual. Played versus on Halo3 and of course, I died everytime! ): Then I just gave up and we watched t.v. He had work at 8, so he left around 7:30ish and said I could stay if I wanted cause he would be off around 11:45. So I stayed since I didn't have to be home. I just watched the Top Chef reunion and then told Lady to come over, but she picked me up to get food instead. Then back to the apt and then she left at 10 cause she stayed to watch Grey's with me, even though it was a rerun! After she left I watched part of ABDC and played campaign on Halo3 on easy of course. Ha!

And now I'm at the part where I need to get back to special ops or something and I want to give up cause my eyes hurt and I'm feeling sleepy! I must say I'm pretty decent at this game. (: haha. So it's almost 11:30 and Matt should be home soon. I'll probably leave not too long after he gets back, but I'm going to take a quick nappy before he comes home. Laaaaate!

Friday the 27th
Stayed at home pretty much all day and found out I have stupid viruses on the PC. So I guess I need to get on the antivirus software stuff. Not only that, but my macbook pro charger short circuited or something a few days ago, so now it barely works at all. ):
Lady came and got me around 10ish to go to Abbie's birthday party. It was okay, I really didn't know anyone and everyone was either buzzin or drunk by the time we got there. We left the party by 1am and then I hung out with Matt for a bit. I found out not too long after I left that our friend John's car got stolen by someone who was at the party. I guess someone took his keys from the kitchen. So dumb! I hope they get caught. I ended up going home around 4ish.

Saturday the 28th
Did nothing the whole day. I was pretty much just stressed out about a lot of stuff.

Sunday the 29th
Almost had a meltdown by being so stressed. I couldn't sleep at all. I think I went to bed at 7am and then had to get up at 9 to get ready for church with my family. After church did a few errands, went home, and then I napped for a bit. That's pretty much it.

Monday the 1st
Stressed to the max. Ended up missing my first two classes. Went to Longs Drugs to pick something up and went to my lab class. Afterwards went to Trader Joes with Lady and then got food to eat. We talked for a bit and I went to go meet up with Matt to have a "talk" with him. Things didn't go as I expected. Nothing was ever really resolved. I don't know anymore. Went home around 11 and just tried to sleep.

Tuesday the 2nd
I had a job interview! It went ok, I'm so bad at things like that! ): Agh! I still need to take a drug test and then I'm done. Hopefully I get it! I talked to these two other guys and they were pretty cool. I hope they get it too. But afterwards, I went over to Matt's and we hung out like normal. Around 7, we went to dinner like we usually do and then hung out back at his place. We both fell asleep and then by the time I woke up, Carrie and Shaun had just gotten there cause they were going to stay the night. I left a little while after cause I had school in the morning the next day.

And TODAY!
Didn't go to school! Big surprise?! I felt so bad that I couldn't even move. ): I just wanted to lay there, which I did. I ate a little hoping it would make me feel better, which it did a little, but I still feel sick to my stomach. I watched The Ruins by myself and I must say that movie is not scary at all. I don't know, I remember wanting to see that movie when I saw the trailers when it had first come out. Then again, trailers are supposed to make it look interesting. I thought there would be more to it. I'm pretty much disappointed with it. Oh well. That's all I really did today. Right now I'm just laying down again. I just want to sleep till tomorrow morning. ):

So I'm going to take it back to...

Wednesday-18
I ended up not going to school and I hung out with my friend Mel and her babies Hailey and Drew. (: We just got food to eat and caught up. Then afterwards I had dinner with Matt at our usual place and that's all I remember that day. Haha.

Thursday-19
I went to Urgent Care cause I wasn't feeling so great. 4 hours later I went home and ate and took a nap. Then afterwards I met up with Lady and went to Trader Joes. Then we decided to take a road trip up to LA, spur of the moment kind of thing. Ate at Sanamluang, drove around Glendale, and headed to Ventura to drop some people's stuff off.

Friday-20
Mel came and got me and I went with her to Costco and ate lunch at Olive Garden after. Then she dropped me off at home cause she needed to get back to work. Later on, I went to Walgreens and then went to the beach to see the bonfire set up and then went to my cousins house and chilled there for a few hours. Lady came and got me around 10 and we went to Main St. Went to Good Bar and saw Cally and her friends, then Dargans, then back to Good Bar for some gummy bear shots, then to El Rey Cantina, and Charlene's Tapas. Stayed at Charlene's cause they had live music. Soooo fun. Hahaha. Around 1 we went to Matt and Alex's place and I was already borderline drunk. Went home at 5am?

Saturday-21
Did nothing most of the day. Went to Matt's and just watched UFC the entire time. Then I left to go meet up with Lady at In-N-Out and met her friend Javier. Afterwards went back to the apartment and hung out there till about 2am.

Sunday-22
I went to Jenny and Dave's house warming thing around 5. Got to talk and catch up with Steph. I left around 7 to go to Matt and Alex's place cause they wanted to have that bonfire. So we went to the beach at 8. Their friend Agee went too and then Lady showed up. It was fun. We didn't leave the beach till midnight and Matt and Alex were drunk off their asses. Matt climbed on the top of my car just as soon as a police car showed up in the parking lot. Idiot! But the police just asked us if we were ok and let us go. Thank goodness. Haha. So we got food at TDM before we headed to the apartment. I dropped Matt off and stayed for about 30 minutes and headed home.

Monday-23
Went to school. After lab class I went to Matt's apartment but I only hung out there for about 2 hours and then I went home cause I wanted to sleep.

Tuesday-24
Had no school, and Glacy picked me up for lunch. We ate at In-N-Out and then she took me home. After I went to the bank and went to Border's to buy a book. After that I picked up Rudy and went to Starbucks to wait for Lady. Then we all went to eat Pho. Then I dropped Rudy off around 8ish so he could work on his paper. We picked up Frank and went to Yoyumyum. (: Then we went to Sea Rounder to visit Mack who bartends there. Ended up staying there for an hour or so while Lady and Frank got drinks. Then I dropped them off and then headed back to the bar cause Mack wanted me to keep him company. I went home at 130am.

Wednesday-25
Missed my first class but made it to Micro lecture. Then Lady and I went to American Apparel and got lunch at Chicago Ribs. Yum. (: Then I went to T-shirt wearhouse and to Lady's work to show her something and then to Matt's apartment. Played with Jasmine and Jordan for a bit while Matt helped Summer assemble a stroller. Then we just chilled for a few hours and went to eat at Sushi Marina. Food took forever, but it was good. (: Got back to his place and then I left around 10 and went back to Sea Rounder cause Mack was working again and Nick wanted me to stop by. Hung out there and met a few new people. I got to ride in the back of Shawn's Honda motorcycle, which was cool, but I felt like I was going to fall off. ): Hahah. I headed home at 2 and went to bed around 3.

Thursday (today!)
Did nothing. I helped Lady find an outfit for the 80's party we're supposed to go to. Then back to my house where we just hung out and worked on our outfits. Hahahah. That is pretty much it and now I'm just laying in bed. I really should go to school tomorrow. Haha. Hopefully I do. Agh, this was long. Aright... goodnight!

I can't sleep. ): I have school in the morning, but who knows if I'll wake up to even go. I'm seriously not feeling it. It's one of those weeks where I feel like I just have to stay in and be alone, contemplate. I need to get away.

I'm watching The Wackness right now. It's weird seeing Josh Peck playing that kind of character since I'm so used to seeing him on Nickelodeon, but it's only 18 minutes into the movie so I can't really say much.


I feel so stuck. I don't see why I invest so much time into something when I am so uncertain of the outcome. Especially when the outcome outweighs more toward the heartbreak side. Just let go, forget about it right? I wish it were just that easy. So much easier said than done. I wish I can just bust an Eternal Sunshine for a Spotless Mind. Why is it that we always want what we can't have? And once we have it, we don't want it anymore or we slowly lose interest? Everything is just so complicated. Everyone around me seems to have at least one thing in their life that they are so content with, why can't I have that? That little ounce of happiness in this mess I call my life. I miss the simplicity of life as a child. A time when we had no worries in the world, well not any life changing ones at the least.


So I happened to take a break from this blogging thing and now the movie is over. It's good. I love all the songs in it. It all just went well. I wish I could elaborate more on it, but I'm getting pretty tired. I will end it with a quotes from the movie..


Luke Shapiro - "So that was all bullshit right? All that stuff about embracing your pain, making it a part of you? You can't do this, you can't just give up. Life is hard and it's full of pain and whatnot, but we take it cause there's great stuff too. And we can do it cause we have friends... because we have each other."

Dr. Squires - "That was really fucking cheesy what you said just then."
Luke Shapiro - "There's enough assholes in the world Dr. Squires, don't be another one."
Dr. Squires - "Now you sound like me."

Luke Shapiro [to Dr. Squires] - "Baby steps, you'll be okay."

Luke Shapiro "Do me a favor, Steph?"
Stephanie - "Huh?"
Luke Shapiro - "Don't say nothin' okay? Just stand there till I leave. I wanna remember this. I've never done it before.."
Stephanie - "Never done what?"
Luke Shapiro - "..had my heart broken."