I'm pretty sure that everyone who uses any instant messaging program has at least one of these things. I know I always have lots. I just don't want to keep making new posts just to show them. :P

Feel free to post your own conversations. I'll probably double-post a lot since I have so much to share...

Me: you KNOW that would never work
Angie: whatever
Angie: its like your plan to destroy humanity
Me: ...
Me: a girl can have dreams!

Joey:
if i was at a blind internet date, and i never seen this girl, and we met at a resturaunt the next day
Joey:
and she was REALLY REALLY fat
Joey:
and REALLY REALLY ugly
Joey:
would it hurt to tell her?
Me:
er...

Me: do you think turtles are scary at all?
Varsha: nope
Varsha: i think it's just you
Me: no, i never had a fear of them before today
Me: except for in the ocean
Varsha: what happened today?
Me: oh, i had this dream last night
Me: i was in a different house that had a pool
Me: there was a walkway over the pool, made of wood
Me: the whole place was kind of dirty and unkempt
Me: anyway, there were a couple of brown ducks swimming around in the water
Me: (i was on the walkway)
Me: and i was like "oh, ducks!"
Me: and then this gigantic duck... walked through the fence or something...
Me: and i was like "fuck! duck!"
Varsha: hahahahah
Me: so i screamed to my mom, "MOM! there's a freaking huge duck here! what did you do!"
Me: and she replied "oh, we were using the backyard to experiment"
Me: "we were making animals gigantic"
Me: and then this really huge cow came through the fence
Me: and i was freaked out
Me: (these animals looked really plasticky and were about the size of Hummers)
Me: so that was scary enough
Me: but THEN
Me: THEN i was still standing there, and the huge duck and cow had vanished
Me: and this totally MASSIVE turtle appeared
Me: scariest thing i've ever dreamt, i swear
Varsha: hahaha
Me: i thought it was going to eat me
Me: it was the size of a freakin' house!
Me: a really BIG house
Me: so i was screaming madly
Me: because i was extremely terrified
Me: and now i am slightly afraid of turtles
Varsha: oh wow
Varsha: hahahahhha
Varsha: :)
Varsha: sorry, man, but that's pretty funny
Me: thanks...?
Varsha: :)
Me: i don't know, usually the feelings you get in dreams, they don't stay when you wake up
Me: but i'm still scared of turtles
Varsha: that is odd
Varsha: but still funny
Me: man, if you saw a turtle the size of a house, i think you would be very frightened of them too
Me: or maybe not
Me: but probably
Varsha: well yeah
Varsha: if it was in real life
Me: i just can't shake the image of the turtle
Varsha: yeesh
Varsha: maybe if you saw a normal turtle it'll soothe the nerves?
Me: i really don't know...
Varsha: no harm in trying
Me: where am i going to find a turtle?
Varsha: doesn't tiffany have one?
Me: uh...
Me: it was a certain kind of turtle though
Varsha: oh jeez
Me: that kind that always looks mean
Varsha: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Me: what?
Varsha: the mean species of turtle now is it?
Varsha: :)
Me: i can tell you're not taking me completely serious
Me: that was a scary fucking dream!
Me: oh, i don't know what kind it was X|
Me: but turtles... they have this evil gleam in their eye
Me: i've seen it before but it never made a difference to me
Varsha: hahaha
Varsha: maybe they just don't like you?
Me: maybe they hate me
Me: they look like those bitter old men, really they do
Me: the kind that want to beat you with a cane because you're a whippersnapper
Varsha: hahahahhaha
Varsha: maybe you should stop doing things that whippersnappers love to do


And also, because I have apparently never posted it?

Me: once upon a time... there were five small orphans
Me: panda orphans
Me: with clothes
Varsha: the saddest kind
Me: made from cheese
Me: the clothes were made of cheese, not the panda orphans
Me: anyway
Varsha: oh
Me: one day they got so hungry that they had to eat their cheese-clothes
Me: so then they were naked
Me: and still orphans
Me: and one panda telepathically sent a message to another one
Me: because pandas can't talk like we can
Me: and it thought
Me: "we need to find new clothes, new parents, and food"
Me: and the other one telepathically responded: "BAMBOO BAMBOO BAMBOO"
Varsha: hahahahha
Me: which of course was the appropriate way to reply
Varsha: oh, but of coruse
Varsha: course*
Me: so they trekked across the stars looking for the things they needed
Me: well, wanted and needed
Me: after many eons they realized that they could not breathe in space because there was no air
Me: and they didn't last long enough to understand that if they just believed they could breathe then they would be saved
Me: so they all imploded and had horrible naked deaths in the vacuum of space
Me: and that is why pandas are almost extinct
Me: the end
Varsha: wow
Varsha: i was told about some random poachers before hand
Varsha: thank you, ------
Varsha: thank you for opening my eyes to the truth!
Me: just doing my job
Varsha: well, you were brilliant
Varsha: here's $400 for your cause!
Me: why thank you
Me: i will spend it on cheese-clothes for pandas
Varsha: ...but they might eat them
Varsha: shouldn't you get them real clothes?
Me: if i get them cheese-clothes then they can eat them if they need to
Me: multipurpose items are important to survival
Varsha: ...but isn't that unsanitary?
Me: they're pandas
Me: and everyone knows pandas are antibacterial
Me: ever since 1894
Varsha: hey, SORRY, but no one ever told me!
Varsha: how can you people do this?!
Varsha: keeping valuable information from me?!
Me: sorry, i guess i figured you would know
Me: another reason why pandas are endangered is because people use them to make antibacterial products
Me: it's really a horrible thing but it's apparently the most economical
Varsha: that's why they call them "panda shots"!
Varsha: they're made from REAL PANDAS!
Me: indeed
Me: some people pretend they're made from fake pandas, but they know the truth
Varsha: wow

---Edit---

Dude: (DID YOU SEE I USED THAN RIGHT)
Me: oh my! such improvement!
Dude: YAY!. see i told you i would start to after a while =p. just need to be trained.
Me: ...like a dog?
Me: perhaps i should hit you on the nose with a virtual newspaper every time you use a word incorrectly
Me: "bad boy! no! it has an apostrophe!"
Dude: i'll bite you bitch.
Me: then you get to sleep outside
Me: on the grass
Dude: D=

Me:
why did you put up a "looking at porn and enjoying it a lot" face?
Joey:
LMFAO!
Joey:
Its my Gary Busey face
Me:
i see...
Joey:
"Jizz In My Pants" face
Me:
seems more like "was enjoying porn and then accidentally clicked on 2 Girls 1 Cup"
Joey:
HAHAHAHA

i talk to jolenesiah at least 12 hours a day. wonder what's our conversation like? have fun reading.

ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:

u will be surprise
each of the rice smell of egg
vvv nice
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
hey
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
what
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
next time we should open tiger meowing mamak stall
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:

u know my fried rice inspired by long time ago tvb drama
TUCK fried rice
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
oh that
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
so i soak my riec b4 i fried it
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
don't care
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
so got aroma
if put serai no need to put egg la
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
i want to make my bakalava
z meh?
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
ooo
z meh?
serai is lemongrass la
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
yes
z meh = said it in hokkien
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
tak faham z meh
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
z meh = yes meh
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
ah
si meh
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
but u said u use daun limau purut not lemongrass
aiya
my version is z meh la
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
hai
haih
lemongrass=serai blend a
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
u use both is it?
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
la*
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
no la
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
that y untuk tumis la
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
serai and daun limau purut is different la sui po
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
itu utk*
haiyo of course i know la
i doing curry business my god
serai = lemon grass la
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
sui po
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
u say my curry leaf ma
i say i use the kaffier lime leaf la
curry leaft also v nice
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
so?? ur kaffier leaves r not written in the recipe??
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
no
i changed it
cause i think curry leave nicer
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
curry leaves so kiamsiap sui po
sui po
hahahaahahahaha
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
haa

should be 3 stalk of cury leaf

*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
why so little?? use more la
u go to market and they only give u 3??
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
gila 100 grm nia
no
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
huh??
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
i ca from my pokik
pokok
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
3 leaves for 100 gram
hahaha
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
stalk
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
u baru tanam pokok curry??
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
i change the kaffie leaves
kaffie lime cannot put alot
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
okok
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
it will have all the smell
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
yes i know
haha
yes very overwhelming
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
suppose to put stalk
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
say cheese
ペセポネ Persephone -[3k2go] Celly is Cutie n Hottie! i win says:
then forgoten
piak
bite
*ReNaYe ~Me0w* says:
u will be on nutang forum

Wow, it's just like the Foodbox.

---Edit---

Me: we should totally get pancakes
Tiffany: when? lol
Me: i have no idea
Me: but sometime this week!
Tiffany: ok lol
Tiffany: im busy wed and thursday
Tiffany: what about friday?
Me: i think my mom is throwing a party on Friday
Tiffany: oh hum
Tiffany: saturday?
Me: need that to prep
Tiffany: hum tuesday?
Me: that would probably work
Me: we should check with Angie and Varsha
Tiffany: lol ok
Tiffany: where at?
Me: Original Pancake House :D
Me: they have super awesome-tacular pancakes
Tiffany: do they only have pancakes?
Tiffany: lol
Me: i believe they also have other items of the breakfasting sort
Tiffany: ok cause im not so much of a pancake fan lol
Me: whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat but pancakes are totally freaking crazy-tastic good
Tiffany: lol
Tiffany: im a waffle/hashbrown fan
Me: well, perhaps they have such things there
Tiffany: lol i hope so
Me: i would not know, seeing as i lust only after the delicious pancake...
Tiffany: lol
Tiffany: so u excited?
Me: about the pancakes? you betcha!
Tiffany: lol
Tiffany: no school
...
Tiffany: oh and what time do u wanna hang out tuesday?
Me: in the morning, if that's possible
Me: morning is when pancakes are most appropriate for feasting upon
Tiffany: sure lol
Tiffany: just pancakes or do u want to do more?
Me: dunno, we could walk around
Tiffany: ok well i have a car now so lol
Me: oh, sweetness
Tiffany: so yea we cna go anywhere ur heart desires lol

ycsatitw 82 (12:24:42 AM): you know, I wouldn't be surprised if that Kanye West shit was scripted and planned. ha ha ha ha
machinaviperpheo (12:25:59 AM): with anyone else.... maybe with Kayne West.... and the way that happened.... not at all tho.. Kayne West is always doing mess like that
ycsatitw 82 (12:26:43 AM): they should lock him up
ycsatitw 82 (12:27:12 AM): so he can have a 6'6 362 pound boyfriend named Bubba
machinaviperpheo (12:27:59 AM): HAHA Yea.. now that would be great!
ycsatitw 82 (12:28:17 AM): indeed
machinaviperpheo (12:28:30 AM): haha you should put that for your status update. haha
ycsatitw 82 (12:28:47 AM): sure, why not
machinaviperpheo (12:29:15 AM): lol yea that would be funny if that happened to him, lol
ycsatitw 82 (12:30:35 AM): but the thing is, since he's famous they'd put him in protective custody
ycsatitw 82 (12:31:38 AM): so there would be nobody to bully him
ycsatitw 82 (12:32:38 AM): if he were just a regular guy in prison he'd be one sore motherfucker
machinaviperpheo (12:33:37 AM): helll yea... lets see how cocky he'll be then

Ahaha, Bubba. XP

I stole this from one of my friend's facebook pages. the first line is his status and the following are the comments that ensued

Lance: holy crap! this damn epic battle of man vs. home work is just begining!
Mon at 10:29pm

Logan:
THE HOMEWORK'S SHIELDS ARE DOWN!!!! COMMENCE THE ATTACK!!!!
Mon at 11:01pm

Lance:
SHIELDS ARE STILL UP !!!! PULL BACK!!!!
Mon at 11:06pm

Logan:
I CAN"T PULL BACK!!!! AAAARRRRGGGGHHH! *pen explodes*
Mon at 11:13pm

Lance:
WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING!!!
Mon at 11:17pm

Logan:
I CAN"T SEE!!!! THERE IS INK IN THE WAY!!! BLOT IT UP!!!
Mon at 11:18pm

Lance:
AHHHHH!!!! IT'S PERMANANT!!!!
Mon at 11:23pm

Lance:
PERMENANT*!!!!!!!
Mon at 11:23pm

Logan:
PERMANENT*!!!
Mon at 11:27pm

Lance:
REPNENTAM*!!!!
Mon at 11:30pm

Logan:
REPENTMAN**!!!! FOR THE END IS NEAR!!
Mon at 11:30pm

Lance:
METNERPAN***!!!! NEW AIRLINE SERVICE
Mon at 11:35pm

Logan:
MENTERNAP****!!! A NAP THAT YOU TAKE IN THE MENTER OF THE DAY!!!!
Mon at 11:38pm

Lance:
RENTMENAP*****!!!!! A NAP THAT IS PAID FOR MONTH TO MONTH WITH 0 DUE AT LEASE SIGNING!!!!!
Mon at 11:40pm

Logan:
TAPMENAPER******!!!!! A SEXUAL ACT THAT REQUIRES A FIRM TAPPING ON THE PERSON'S NAPER, AND FOR ONE TO WEAR A PIRATE COSTUME!!!!
Mon at 11:42pm

Logan:
REMNANTPE********!!!! WHAT REMAINS AFTER URNINATING!!!
Mon at 11:48pm

Lance:
PATMERENN******!!!!! COOL SLANG THAT MEANS COOL
Mon at 11:50pm

Lance:
RAPENEMNT********!!!!!! BAD STUFF
Mon at 11:51pm

Logan:
PETERMANN*********!!!!!!! WHAT PETER PAN BECAME WHEN HE LEFT NEVERLAND!!!!!
Mon at 11:51pm

Lance:
I CANT BELIEVE I DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE **********!!!!!!!
Mon at 11:53pm

Logan:
I CAN"T BELIEVE IT"S NOT BUTTER*********!!!!!!!!
Mon at 11:54pm

That was epic. :D

---Edit---

Me: by the way i had a dream involving you
Dude: tried, and they do have some copies but i need it today =/ and what was the dream about?
Me: well, i was on my laptop, IMing you, even though for some reason you were sitting right across from me
Me: and i think we were talking about lesbians
Me: and this like... congo line paraded in
Me: and all the people were talking about how they were lesbians
Me: it was mostly girls with two guys
Me: and i was like "you're guys, you can't be lesbians"
Me: and then they came over to us and started arguing
Me: they were pointing to you and saying "YOU CAN'T BE A LESBIAN, YOU'RE CATHOLIC!"
Dude: huh.
Me: i honestly think that something in the food here is giving me weird dreams

---

Me: looks like the expression of the face of a five year old child that didn't get cookies when he asked his mommy
*on the face
Joey: Hahahahahahaha
Hauhauhauhau!
jajajajaj!
Me: "i'm going to run away from home because i hate you for not giving me cookies"
you know
Joey: yee
Me: if i have kids like that
i'll tell them horrorstories about fat people
and they'll never ask for cookies again

Me: if my future husband snores
Varsha: well
Me: i'm going to force him to learn to play the didgeridoo
Varsha: hahahhaah
Lucy: what's a didgeridoo?
Varsha: i'd force him to play with the dippin' dots machine
Me: the best instrument in the universe
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rshWZU56wkQ&feature=related
Varsha: oh hey!
Varsha: is that that australian instrument?
Me: yes
Varsha: nice
Me: i decided today that it is my favorite instrument
Varsha: hahahahha nice :)
Lucy: cooool
Me: that will be one of my two criteria for marriage; he must not be asian, and he must play the didgeridoo
Me: all else is secondary
Varsha: what if he doesn't know how to play
Lucy: it sounds like it could be from a computer!
Varsha: but he learns before the wedding
Me: hm
Me: i suppose that would be acceptable...
Me: as long as he's good
Varsha: wow
Varsha: pressure
Me: you betcha
Lucy: can you only get them in australia?
Me: you know i have no idea?
Me: but i assume not
Varsha: so do i
Varsha: it should be easier to recieve
Me: if i wasn't so goddamn lazy and unmotivated i might try to learn myself
Varsha: :)
Varsha: might as well dump it on your hubbie to be
Me: yes indeedy
Me: no piano or violin for OUR offspring
Lucy: :D
Me: nope, it's didgeridoos all the way
Me: and if they complain, they have to eat wasabi instead of ice cream for dessert
Me: i believe this is an adequate punishment
Lucy: heh heh heh :D
Varsha: as do i
Varsha: as
Varsha: do
Varsha: i
Lucy: cruel and unusual punishment XD
Me: yeah, i'm gonna win that "World's Best Parent" award before my kids are even born
Varsha: :) that's quite a feat
Me: so when they give me mugs and shirts with that printed on them
Me: it's going to mean it
Varsha: ahaha
Lucy: the dad would win "world's most unique dad"
Lucy: for playing such a unique instrument
Me: oh, he'd be unique in other ways, too
Me: i can assure you of that
Me: i'm not marrying a boring dude
Me: unless it's just that his last name is Boring and he's actually quite the interesting fellow
Lucy: awesome :D
Lucy: his first name is "I'm"
Me: hey, screw that
Me: even if he's interesting
Lucy: XD
Varsha: :)
Me: it would be almost as bad if his name was Barry
Lucy: ewww I don't like the name Barry
Me: yeah... Barry Boring
Me: i would pass
Varsha: haha
Lucy: :D
Varsha: i'm eatching arrested development
Me: and anyway his full name would probaby be something awful, like Barold
Varsha: and the guy's name is barry
Varsha: barold :)
Lucy: Barold!! XD
Me: ah, speculations about life
Lucy: i love it. :D

I want to play a didgeridoo.

You know you can make a cheap one out of a plastic pipe and beeswax? It's really the circular breathing that's the hard part.