feeling: Excited
watching: Nada

Wheee~~~!!! =DDD

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR, EVERYONE~~~!!!

Hope you all have a wonderful and prosperous year (^_______^)v I just realised I keep too many blogs it's so weird o_O;; I write something different in all of them though, but I think I'm going to start sorting them =3

More privatised entries in the blogs that are less read/not read, and random blahdegook in this one XD Thank you everyone who responded to my last entry <333 (@Muffy, Nah... You didn't miss anything... it was so spontaneous XD)

I still have to put my latest bentos up =_=;; Blaaah why am I sooo lazy? x_x;;

L8r,

���Kuriח

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feeling: Excited
watching: Nada

I've made some seriously drastic decisions in my life lately that'll probably give me invaluable experiences that I never even dreamed could happen... As it goes, though, I blogged about it already and I don't see the point in copying the same blog out twice so please refer to my personal site and read my latest blog...

I'm SO EXCITED about it! Emma actually found an amazing site for it too and so all I'm awaiting is whether Warwick will let me defer my entry... Everything depends on Wednesday, really. I've decided to let God make that decision for me. If when I ask about it on Wednesday, they say yes, I'll take it as a sign that God wants me to do it, if they say no... I guess I'll have to rethink things through and pray harder!

Onto happier news, Emma's coming to visit me on Saturday!!! =DDD I'm dead excited!!! <333 Hehe, and it's Chinese New Year on Thursday too~~~ (^_^)v

Anyways I need to go to bed now... Just wanted to drop a note on NuTang to say hi everyone and let you all know I'm not dead XD I might start blogging on my personal site soon though... It's so dead lately... I haven't been bothered to put anything up =S I should do soon. Anyways, gnight all~!

L8r,

��Kuriח

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feeling: Mixed Feelings
watching: HanaKimi (Just Finished)

OH MY WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just finished watching the HanaKimi drama (Jap version)... I have to admit, it was BRILLIANT. Sheer brilliance. Seriously, I loved it so much! In fact, I loved it so much that I just had to blog about it immediately, even though I should be sleeping since it's a school night (refer to date/time of entry) =3

Have to admit, I absolutely loved the manga and was filled with excitement at the prospect of a drama, but when I heard the Chinese version had Ella (from S.H.E) who I personally found rather ugly and other various actors who I really don't like, I downright refused to watch it. Simply because it'd probably ruin HanaKimi for me, even though my absolutely, most favourite, beloved Chinese singer, JJ, is in it. But his part is too minor for me to run the risk of hating a series I have loved for too long. (He's the geeky big bro, who really wasn't that geeky in HanaKimi =3)

Little did I know or realise that there was a Japanese version as well!

So, when a friend of mine sent me a vid yesterday or something composed of scenes from a Japanese drama declaring the 'non-gay-ness' (wink wink) of Kagurazaka (bless him!), I recognised the names and scenes immediately and asked her if it was HanaKimi. She had no idea, but I knew it had to be, and I was right!

I wanted to look at the vid again today but it's been removed from YouTube unfortunately, so I can't post it, but it was so funny! XD Anyways, after that, I asked Emma the Banana if she'd seen it, and she, being an absolute angel, found a channel on Veoh for me that has the full thing uploaded, I began to watch diligently.

It's brilliant. I found it so hilarious and oh my word... for some parts, I literally fell out of my chair in laughter... It made me laugh, it made me cry, it's amazing and I seriously recommend it to anyone and everyone!

I got out my HanaKimi manga scanlations though because there were scenes where I totally didn't remember at all since it was years ago I'd read the manga, but I realised the drama doesn't actually follow the manga that much. Usually that'd be a reason to stop watching completely, but for HanaKimi, I just put the manga away and watched.

Because it was that brilliant!

I loved it, I loved it, I loved it, I loved it SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!!! <333333333333333 ...I think I'm going to have to re-watch it =3 ...After I get some work done, of course... >_>;;

Seriously, though, it's only 12 eps long and it is AMAZING <333

And is it just me, or are some guys far too fit for their own damn good?! XD I mean... Yamamoto Yusuke (HE'S ONLY 20!!! Zomw. I am so moving to Japan and stalking him!!! ...I want his personal blog/email address. I'll get it. I know I will +_+), Oguri Shun (...Would it be very inappropriate of me to send an email to a 25 year old declaring my undying love for him and begging him to marry me...? =3) and Hiro Mizushima (Hey... he's only 23... maybe I should send the email to him instead? =3) are my personal favourites, but there are loads more fitties in there...

Defo a drama all girls out there should be watching!!! Zomw Japanese hotties!!! XDDD Tbh there were parts where I wanted to scream at the characters, but half an ep/an ep later I was just pure swooning over them... (well, him. Sano, to be precise =3 I grew to absolutely adore him... Parts of it I just sat in my chair thinking "hug her, hug her, hug her, hug her!!!" and I totally didn't mind that it was obvious he would. I was just squealing with joy when he did! <333)

UGH DARNIT I'M SO LEARNING JAPANESE TIL FLUENCY!!!!!!!!!!!! >_<;;

This will be my new motivation! >=3 ...And now I really want a Japanese boyfriend... >_>;; But I should probably just concentrate on my studies for now ^^;; ...But BLEURGH! >=3

I have to admit, though, I was thoroughly disappointed with the ending. I was expecting more of an ending. Like, [Spoiler, highlight to read]: a proper reunion??? I'm sure there was one in the manga?!

Anyways, very disappointed, so gonna get my manga out and double check. And [Spoiler II, highlight to read]: I was expecting more of a response from Mizuki when Sano kissed her at the airport?!?! I mean... At least call him 'Izumi' or say 'thank you' or something?! I mean... "Okay"???

Grarrrghhh!!! That's really annoying me >_<;; Defo have to double-check manga. And seriously, I was expecting a final Sano/Mizuki scene??? Blehhh so disappointed! >_<;; Oh!!! Another massive disappointment was [Spoiler IV, highlight to read]: the lack of response from Mizuki full stop... Like, when Sano hugged her, she just stood there with her hands limp and decided she loved him after all... Like... What?! Hug him back!!! >=3

There was definitely more Sano/Mizuki mutual chemistry and romance in the manga! >_<;; But that's probably down to the manga being 100+ chapters and the series only being 12 eps... Such a shame!!! I would watch it regardless of length of it! And I think there was a special chapter in the manga of '3 years later' or something... Mizuki and Sano getting married! <333 Such a shame that wasn't filmed ;_; But still... the rest of the series makes up for it =3 Both the manga and series are amazing =]

Omw... ep 11, when they all [Spoiler III, highlight to read]: started cheerleading to 'Girlfriend' by Avril -- that was SO unexpected I fell off my chair with laughter!!! Sheer brilliance though, I loved it!!!

OMW...... ARRRGHHH I wish it didn't end ;_; Such an amazing series!!! =Cries= I WANT A HANAKIMI II!!! >_<;; I really didn't like the ending!!! Arg! And omw I found the blogs of the hotties!!! But they're all in JAPANESE!!! >_<;; (Shock horror... >_>) Grarrrghhh I cba to read so much Japanese!!! >_<;; I'm not good at it either! ;_; Give me German any day! @_@;;

Although I loved listening to all that Jap whilst watching the series... =Sigh=... Yooosh! Taking proper Jap lessons as soon as I get into Uni! Definitely!!! >=3

Gna re-read my HanaKimi manga at parts now! (Then go to bed. I'm gna be dead tomo--er... today... @_@ Argh Warwick Uni Departmental Open Day today too!!! Poo! >_<)

Gnight all!!!

Watch HanaKimi (if you haven't already)~~~!!! Jap version, though! =P

L8r,

��Kuriח

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feeling: Blehhh
listening to: Nada

MY EXAMS ARE OVER~~~ MY EXAMS ARE OVER!!! =DDD Oh, and did I mention? MY EXAMS ARE OVER!!!!!!!!!!!! (^_________^)v

Well actually they were over last Thursday. That was my final exam (C3, maths, which I pretty much failed but nevermind sigh...) My parents are getting really pissed off at me though, for the amount of work I haven't done. My mum's freaking out that I might end up with a B in maths. She's thinking of getting me a tutor @_@;;

I don't want a tutor �_�;;

But yes! Now that my exams are over I am----...under a lot more stress =_=;; What with all the classwork, coursework, homework, many different topics and syllabuses to learn etc etc. >_<;;

=Dies=

Ugh. I just want this year to be over... Honestly the amount of work is killing me >_<;; So stressful! And deadlines are coming up and I am completely unmotivated and I am failing exams and blah blah blah.

And I am ranting =_=;;

Hm... I seem to have noticed, my deeper entries generally get less feedback XD It's true though =3 Like my previous entry, 2 comments, yet my entry before that got like 8 when I rambled on about nothing in particular =3 I wonder if it's because people don't want to because they feel like they are intruding into my private life? But by reading my blog, aren't you doing that anyways? o_O;; So it's not like I mind =p Anything I write in this blog I don't mind anyone else finding out =]

Anyways. I have so much wooooooooork ffs! >_<;; I think I'll have to get on with that now... ;_; I really don't feel like it. Reaaally don't want to. I'm so unmotivated... Anyone got any motivation techniques??? Or anyone got anything to re-spark my interest in drama? Cos I'm pretty much failing that ._.;;

I'm in school right now... >_>;; Really, seriously cba to work. So blogging instead =3 Hmmm... Two days ago would have been the one year anniversary of Will (ghose of you who were reading my blog back then would have heard me refer to him by his Chinese name, 'Him', I've decided to call him by his English name now though... Although I'm still uncomfortable with calling him 'Willy', so 'Will' will have to do XD) had I not already broken up with him 11 months ago yesterday XD

I realised yday as well, when I looked at my phone calendar, that the next baptism service, Sunday 16th March, is his bday (I have bday reminders on my phone)... >_>;; I told David (my 'big bro') already that I was gna get baptised, and he said he'd defo be there at my baptism and drag loads of others along too... I don't think he realised it was the same day as Will's bday either ^^;;

Hmmm I wonder what will happen... >_>;; I haven't told the current sorta "leader" in our church that I'd like to get baptised yet (we don't have a pastor anymore, I blogged about that before I think)... o_o;; But then again, every time I want to go talk to her she's always busy/talking to someone else... And even when I don't want to talk to her she's still busy/talking to someone else, so I haven't been able to mention it to her yet...

Maybe I'll get my dad to say something about it, he's a "council member" of our church so yeah, might ask him to tell her instead since I can't seem to catch her on Sundays at all =3

Oh!!! Did I mention? I'VE ALSO GOT ALL MY UNI OFFERS WOOOOOO!!! =DDD Hehe Birmingham's came in yesterday (^_^)v Offers: Warwick (340 points from A/AS Levels), Loughborough (ABB), Bath (ABB), Birmingham (BBB), Aston (BBB) =]

I originally thought the offers from Loughborough and Bath were higher than my one for Warwick but I just realised it's not! So now I can put Lbro/Bath as my second choice rather than Birmingham/Aston (both which I'm really not very keen on =3) So yay! ^_^ I'm glad they're not higher than Warwick's offer (^_^)v

Originally, I thought, because 340 points could be interpreted any way, I could get BBBc or ABBe or any other sort of combination to do with UCAS points (long story, cba to explain, basically the point system that you get when you get different grades at A/AS Level) and since BBBc is lower than ABB I thought Warwick's offer was lower, but then I realised ABB is only 320 points whereas Warwick wants 340 XD So yeah! I'm happy~~~ (^_^)v

I don't want to make the 'final' decision of my Unis though >_<;; Well, I know Warwick will be my firm choice, but I don't want to make the decision of my insurance choice and decline all the others yet @_@;; =Sigh=... I'll talk to my parents again when I get home tonight =3

Okay best get to work now...

L8r,

��Kuriח

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feeling: Melancholy?
listening to: Truth - Yuna ITo

What makes a heart break?

I was listening to this song, and the first time I heard it I thought it sounded heartbreaking... And once I'd read the lyrics, I decided it pretty much was. It's so bittersweet... What makes two people decide to part...?

and what makes them stay?

What is true heart break? When the person you love doesn't love you back...? When the person you love rejects you? Or when the person you love breaks up with you and you know you can never be together again?

but what is love?

How can you tell when you're in love? I always thought it's one of those things when you just "knew", except for me, it's only after the experience, after analysing myself and my own feelings for the first time from a third-party looking-in sorta view, that I can tell that maybe I was actually in love at one point.

I think there are different levels of love. Well, for me, at least. And I don't mean different kinds, I mean different levels of love for another man/woman. I was explaining to R a while ago online about them, and tbh, it was only after everything was over that I'd begun to realise that I even had those levels of love.

what is true love?

I don't know if I've ever experienced it. I think if I had, then the breakup/leaving would have been so much more painful. I realised I can move on too easily, and every time I move on I think that what I might have felt before wasn't love, but after thinking a little deeper, it was...

just not deep enough.

I wonder if this song will ever apply to me in the future. I find it probably applies to some of my friend's lives. Actually I find the love lives of my friends so amusing, especially when someone mistakes me for being a part of it. I remember everyone thought (maybe some still think, dunno) that C and I were a couple, even though we really weren't, just really good friends was all, but that just amused me so much.

I think I should start keeping my distance with guys? Many people misunderstand the relationships I have with my guy friends. They all think we're together when we're not, but that's because I treat them as brothers and they just treat me as part of the male group and we muck about together.

Mum keeps warning me to stop that cos I'm now "older" and supposed to be "more mature" and therefore misunderstandings like those shouldn't be had, and I should stop acting like a child and control my actions especially in front of guys or I'll probably never get a boyfriend.

But I like acting like part of the guy's group. It's fun. Most of the girls I know are too sensible to jump around play fighting with me acting like a loony, but that's just how I am. Maybe I'll grow out of it. Or maybe I still do it because I haven't found the one I love yet.

Even if I like someone, I will still act like normal around guys, but I know that as soon as I get together with someone, I will stop, because there would only be one person that I'd want to be like that around/to.

the one I love.

Because that's the sort of person I am. I tame down. And for me to be in a relationship I'd have to like a person so, so much; even to the extent of love. People say "you can't love someone at the start of a relationship". I think you can... If love is developed when you're still friends, even if it's a really light level of love, it's still there.

Anyways, the song:

Truth - Yuna Ito:

Let me stay with you
Kizutsuke au no ni
Naze konna ni motomete shimau no
Don�t you know my heart ?
Sunao ni narezu ni ita no
Tada hitotsu no ai ga hoshii no ni

Meguriaeta kiseki wo shinjite
Kanadete yukitai anata e no melody
Moshi mo subete wo nakushite shimatte mo
Kono omoi wa eien na no
It�s my truth

Believe in yourself
Tsumazuita toki mo
Aruitekita namida wo nugutte
Open up your heart, omoide no saki ni kitto
Ashita to iu kibou ga aru kara

Give me your loneliness
And I�ll give you my tenderness
Wasurenai de ite ano hi mita yume wa
Hanareteite mo kono mune ni itsudemo
Kanjite iru anata dake wo
It�s my truth

Tsunagaru hoshi ga sasayaki kakeru
Tomadou kokoro wo te ga shinagara
Deai to wakere hito wa sagasu no
Itsuka musubi aeru tsuyoi kizuna wa

Sekaijuu no kanashimi mo subete
Uketomete mo ii anata no tamenara
Sekaijuu kara okizari ni sarete mo
Sono hitomi wo shinjite iru
It�s my truth

Translation

Let me stay with you even if it hurts both of us
Why must I always demand so much
Don�t you know my heart could never stay put
There�s simply only one love I want

Believing in miracles we can come across
I go on playing a melody for you
Even if I end up losing everything
This feeling is forever, It�s my truth

Believe in yourself even when you stumble
Wipe your tears as you walk on
Open up your heart beyond the memories, surely
There is a hope we call tomorrow

Give me your loneliness
and I�ll give you my tenderness
Don�t forget the dream we saw that day
Even if we�re separated, in this heart
I will feel you forever, It�s my truth

Your whisper reaches the scattered stars
Illuminating my confused heart
In every encounter and farewell, what people search for is
This strong bond that will unite them someday

All the sadness throughout the world
If it�s for you, I can take it all in
Even if the whole world deserts me
I believe in those eyes, It�s my truth

I'm not sure how accurate the translation is, but either way, it's still gorgeous... The tune is gorgeous, right? And the lyrics. When I was listening to it, one line struck me the most. It's probably now one of my favourite lyrics of all time. If there was a "greatest lyrics of all time" book, that line would be in it. Definitely.

...give me your loneliness, and I'll give you my tenderness...

I wonder when I'd be able to say that line.

Man this entry was deep XD I wasn't thinking so deeply before I started it actually >_>;; Just goes to show, eh? XD Well, I'm hungry, break is almost over, so if I don't go and get food now I'll have to starve for today, which, although helps my "diet", is probably not good for me (yup I'm at school again, supposed to be revising. Oh well~)

2 more exams this week, then it'll be over!

L8r,

��Kuriח

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feeling: Lonely
listening to: Truth - Yuna Ito

For lack of a better title, Maruchan just sent me the song 'Truth' by Yuna Ito =] He's right, the melody is beautiful <3 ^_^ I only understand the english bits and a little of the Japanese, but it's still a gorgeous song... It sounds... bittersweet.

Anyways, finished editing my 'Random Layout' for Nuttz and gave it to her, I believe it is in use already~~~ =D I'm so glad she likes it <3 I wasn't sure if she would... it looked too simple and plain to me x_x;;

Also realised I didn't change any of the CSS for this layout when I used it too, so it was completely like the one I was distributing... Which, for me, is a big no-no! I always personalise my own layouts =3 So yes, did a fair bit of personalising on this one with the font and link CSS etc ^_^

It's my mummy's bday tomorrow!!! =D I have to cook for her tomorrow =3 She came back after work today and we all had a nice meal together, was expecting to have some family time since it was her birthday but we didn't really =S Ahhh I thought we would! Dad said we would be or something! >_<;; I missed my friend's 18th party for this!!! x_x;;

Sigh... Oh well... They'll forgive me =( Hopefully we'll do something more for mummy tomorrow =3

...I miss someone...

This is my blog, my personal journal... I think I will start personalising it more.

L8r,

��Kuriח

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