feeling: slightly worried
listening to: Everything - Lifehouse

I'm feeling a little torn... part of me is in shock and anxiety over my University application. I found out my predicted grades for Uni just now... and they're not high enough for the course I want to do at the Uni I want to go to.

I should be having a panic attack, right? But I'm not... somehow, I know the Lord will help me get through this. I want them to raise my predicted grades so I can meet the criteria needed... but I don't know which one I can honestly pull myself up to an 'A' in... I feel so insecure, yet so secure that I will be fine.

It's so strange; a really weird feeling, so just really had to blog.

I'm so confused... I'm not worried about the fact that I may not be able to get into Warwick at all, yet on the other hand, I'm absolutely terrified. I don't even know what grades I'm capable of getting anymore, because of my AS grades... I think there's a higher chance I'll get into Bath than Warwick...!

I remember when Matt said, "Wouldn't it be funny if you got into Bath and I got into Warwick? It'd be like... 'wanna swap'??? XD" I laughed at the time, but honestly, now I know my predicted grades, no, it's not funny!!! >_<;;

Crud...

Please, God, help me...

Edit: It's 15:27, I've finished my German lesson today, and asked about my predicted grades... Found out that my school doesn't have my updated reference and predicted grade: A!!! I *am* predicted an A for German!!! Thank you, Lord... <3333333333

<333

L8r,

feeling: so deeply touched
chatting to: Maru-chan, Ellie the Elephant

God is so good to me... I went to Westwood Church this morning (which was wonderful <3), and had the intention of getting the 12 bus to town afterwards... but as it goes, I only had £1.25 bus money, and after waiting at the bus stop for ages and seeing no bus, I got on the first 12 that I saw.

It went the wrong direction... this bus went out of town instead of in. I got off immediately after I realised... and about 10 seconds later another guy got off after me... another guy who looked Chinese, as well, turned out we both got the bus in the wrong direction ^^;;

So we were looking at the bus time tables on the opposite side of the road, and the next bus wouldn't be till an hour afterwards. I suggested we walk back to campus, and as we were walking and chatting (took about 20 mins walk or so?) I found out that he was an international student from Hong Kong!

After more chatting, I realised that he went to the Warwick Cantonese Fellowship Welcoming on Friday evening and knew half of my Warwick Uni friends too... haha, we had an interesting conversation, and got to know each other a bit better, and I told him that I went to the Mandarin Bible Study group on Fridays.

God is so great! After hearing that, he said he wanted to introduce some of his friends to our Mandarin Bible Study group! Let's hope he does! Anyways, after saying bye to him on campus I told him I'd be walking him (didn't tell him the reason was I had no change left to get another bus... plus I actually wanted to walk) but after a while my feet hurt so much! (My converse were rubbing badly >_<)

So, after a massive dilemma I decided to walk back to the main bus stop (were I'd got on the wrong bus before), and just as I was walking up, I saw the bus that I had to get home on zoom past me...

Darn, I thought... But oh well, it's okay... I'll just get the bus to town (get some change from a shop nearby or something) and get a lift home from my parents (they were at the church in town). I wasn't worried; I knew God would protect me, but when I got back to the main bus stop, to my surprise, the 801 was still there!

I wanted to nip on to ask how long it'd be staying and if I had time to get some change, but the bus driver said I'm leaving now... so I quickly explained my situation to him--that I'd got on the wrong bus before, and was ready to walk out just in case he said 'no ticket, no ride' (he was about to close the door, but I didn't want to get the bus if I wasn't allowed), but to my second surprise that day, he said 'ah that's fine! Can I see your ticket please?'

Praise the Lord! <3 I barely showed him and he was like 'yup sure' and off we went! <333 I saw Andy at the bus stop as well (the guy who I'd walked back to main campus bus stop with after getting the wrong 12) but I don't think he saw me haha... XD Guess he wasn't expecting me to go back and get the bus after he saw me walking off on my way home...

But yeah, just so happy <333

And then, just now... These videos made me cry:

Lifehouse - Everything Skit:

Duty:
Please Click Here - It's flash, so starts automatically.

<3333333

L8r,

feeling: tired
listening to: Jesus You Alone - Tim Hughes

Why is it that the person you want to message you back the most never seems to do so? Even if said person seems interested in you, why doesn't that person reply? They've been online, and you know they have... but when you invited a response, they haven't given one... yet before, you sent a message they could have completely disregarded and not replied to but they did...

I don't understand the workings of a guy's mind... =sigh=

Anyways, recently I've gotten re-addicted to SnS ^^;; Hence been really rather dead on NuTang @_@;; But I haven't really had much to say lately. Too much work to do. I'll blog tomorrow. Going to have a rant on my private too, sooner or later.

I hate my parents one minute, and love them to pieces the next ¬_¬;;

I have so, so, SO much work to do!!! Arrrrggghhh!!!! I hate that I practically failed everything last year so need to work doubly hard now ;_; But our new maths teacher gives us hella loads of homework too... =dies=. (Well, it can be a good thing, I guess... get our syllabus learnt faster so more time can be spent on revision and getting to grips with concepts that we've had confusions over... In my case, she may as well just teach me the entire book again, though x_x)

I wasn't supposed to have come on NuTang, but the past goodness-knows-how-long I've spent on my maths homework has driven me nuts. I needed a break. Okay, back to work now...!

Ah, and I also started reading Checkmate - Malorie Blackman, the final book in the triology... I never had time to get into it, but it was only the 70th page and I was already starting to cry... Such amazing books! <333 Most recommended to anyone and everyone!

Okay gotta go!!! Ciao!

<3333

L8r,

feeling: slightly irritated
listening to: nada

The two weeks have flown by... Rici's come and gone already =( We sent her off to the airport on Saturday. I miss her so much ;_; My sister was in tears because she also misses Rici so much. I almost cried...

I have an open invitation back to Germany to stay with her again though, and likewise she has one to mine again, so it's not like I'll never see her again, but it really is a shame that the exchange is over; there'll probably never be another chance to see all these people together ever again...

Makes one slightly depressed when you think about it... I mean, it really was fun when they were all over here...

Anyways... on other business: why are some people such pricks? Like certain guys in your school who do nothing but piss you off and make snide, racist, rude remarks, and think they're cool and people love them, but really can't see how little the rest of us think of them?

There are a few people like that in our school. When they're alone they can't do jack to you, but when they're together they're just little shyts. Nobody actually likes them, why the heck can't they see that? Nobody is laughing *with* them, if anyone's laughing, it's just laughing at their idiocy.

Man, people like that piss me off. Why do they not stop to think that, when they're taking the mick out of their poor target, why does no one else join in? Why does everyone just ignore them? If they just caught on to everyone's real opinions of them they might stop it.

But then again, they're retarded idiots. Thinking is beyond them, I suppose. It was actually a helluva shock when I found out they hadn't actually yet been kicked out of school... o_O;; What were the teachers thinking?!

I guess our school is that desperate for pupils...? o_O;;

<33333333

L8r,

feeling: tired
reading: Bleach 290

Hmm... First couple of days of school have been pretty good (^_^)v Our drama group is now down from an original group of 11... to 3. Heh... Well, I guess it could definitely be worse! ^^;; But yeah, in a way, I'm glad it's only 3 of us now, because the pressure is now on, and we all know that, so we're all going to pull our weight, whereas the teachers were far too lenient on some of the members of our group last year...

Certain members of our group should have been kicked out. A long, long time ago. And they really dragged us down in the group devised production, and because our devised drama was so disorganised and took so long, we only had a week to properly study for the written exam (in which we should have also read and familiarised ourselves with 3 set texts... none of us read them.)

We were awful, really... Our whole year group was definitely too relaxed, so many of the uber-smart people who were expecting A's and B's came out with D's and such... Of course, we have those who did surprisingly well, too, but... they were few. We also have one or two repeating the year, because they did that badly... =/

So yeah, in a way, I'm dead glad our group is down to 3. Means we get more work done. Our German group is also down from an original 9 to 4... Heh... But at least we'll learn more =D The ones that are left actually properly want to study the subject, and those who did leave were more... erm... 'jokers' of the group... unnecessary distractions, so now that they're gone we should be able to study better =3

Now it just leaves me to go to maths tomorrow... T'was an utter joke when I found out (after I came back from my exchange in Germany) that the whole maths department, give or take a few, were all leaving, including a couple of the best maths teachers I've ever had. Ugh >_<;;

So, just pray that tomorrow will be a good day, and that the new teacher will be just as good, if not, better, to help us with our course!

Aside from that, Rici and I watched 'Grease' yesterday (she likes Johnny Travolto or however you spell his name =3) hehe, both found that quite fun ^_^ I mean... Well, I hadn't arranged for her to meet up with anyone to be honest, and I had school work to finish, too, so we decided to stay home and chill =3

We enjoyed watching it ^_^ She found the ending too... happy, though... Haha... made me laugh XD I loved it! <333 (I have it on DVD, but haven't watched it all the way through since I was... er... very, very young!) The end song is soooo funny! I couldn't stop laughing... I remember going to my friend's 18th once, (t'was like a kareoke/dance thing) and we were dancing to that song, and a friend of mine could sing the whole thing.

I was gobsmacked XD

It's just made up of random---sounds! Like... doobap-shaboody...thingy... whatever... I don't even know how you're supposed to write it out! Haha it's just so weird! I'd love to be able to sing it XD

We stayed at home today, too, hehe... brings me back to the title of this entry! We sang Phantom of the Opera together again, like we did on Saturday or Sunday or something =D Except this time I bought out the Phantom of the Opera SATB version that I acquired from school when the school choir had sung it a while ago =3

I learnt the lower parts while she did the main tune~ T'was really nice =D We haven't gotten very far, yet, but hopefully before the end of the exchange we'll have learnt the whole thing! It sounds good when we get it right/so far! XD

It's like... a erm... ugh... I forgot the word, but it combines most of the songs in PotO together, like, takes extracts and... yeah, sounds really good =D We've learnt so far... "The Phantom of the Opera", "Angel of Music" and "Think Of Me" (^_^)v

Sounds like a lot, but as I said, they're only snippets =P But yeah... Unfortunately, Rici's ill, though! I don't know how she became ill, but because of it I don't think her voice is in tip-top condition =( But it's okay, I've been ill since like... beginning of July? My voice has been crap for soooo long I'm getting used to it =p

But feel really bad that she's ill =( But yeah, we sang anywyas, t'was very, very fun =DDD We stopped at around 8-ish, though, cos my sister needed to go to bed =3 So watched 2/3's of Chicago =3 Then I sent her off to bed to get extra rest =3

...And I really need to rest, too... I'm so tired =/

Anyways~ Overview of tomorrow's day:
08:40-12:30: School
12:30-12:45: Get Home
12:45-13:45: Practise Piano
13:45-14:45: Shower and get dressed
14:45-15:30: Homework
15:30-16:45: Entertain Rici (probs with Phantom of the Opera again XD)
16:45-17:00: Get to Piano Teacher's
17:00-18:00: Piano Lesson
18:00-18:40: Get Home, Eat, Blah
18:40-19:00: Get to Kenilworth School
19:00-21:00: Quiz Night for German Exchangers
21:00+: Improvise!

So~~~ A pretty full day! ^^;; Whew... will be praying for God's guidance~ ^_^

OH! A final thing I forgot to mention!!! On the 9th September it was CK.TW.ORG's 1 year anniversary!!! =DDD I didn't have time to make an update there then (I also kinda completely forgot since I was more or less out all day), but I made one yesterday! ^_^ So yay!!! I'm well happy! I've never been able to keep at a site long enough for any anniversaries before, so YAY!

Speaking of which... I think I've been at NuTang for over a year, too! Haha woo!!! XD NuTang is the first blogging site that's kept me longer than a year, too, I think! Muahaha NuTang is just amazing like that XD

Anyways I'm off to bed now~ G'night all~~~

<333

L8r,

feeling: not bad =3
listening to: nada

Yay!!! My German Exchange Partner (Ricarda, Rici for short) arrived (two days ago)~~~!!! xDDD Really happy she's here~ ^_^

The first day she was here we all went on a picnic with my local church group to Coombe Abbey Country Park, very pretty place, had much fun, yay~ ^_^ Then in the evening we went to a gig that a friend of ours (Ed) is in (also on the exchange) was playing in =]

Yeah~~~ So all in all, it was a very nice day ^_^ There was also other bands at the festival/gig thing, and there was one particular one that was amazing and so, so full of energy! I didn't quite catch their name, but I doubt I'll be forgetting them any time soon--the lead singer was amazing, the band was so good, and because of them the festival became so lively -- loads of people (including Rici) went up near the stage and started dancing [I didn't] haha (^_^)v T'was very amusing to watch ;)

Then~ Yesterday, Moritz (Ed's exchange partner) came over to mine for a bit, then we walked into town, past the park... t'was a nice walk, and a very nice park XD then got a lift back to Ed's... Chilled for a bit, then went to a party in the evening =D

Of course there were drinks, but I didn't drink much, and I don't think Rici had anything but beer (she's over the legal age to have beer in Germany, although I hear they're raising the legal age over there. Apparently they're raising the legal age over here, too =3), and none of us got drunk... =3 Some others at the party, however... heh XD

There were also others on the German Exchange there, so t'was good for her to socialise with them too (^_^)v

Well, today's her first day at work, and my first day back at school... I hope she's doing well... I was kinda politely told to leave once the deputy head came to take her to her classroom (she's working at my little sister's primary school)... nyeh, oh well ^^;;

School at the moment... is really rather boring =P Heh, I have no lessons this morning... ^^;; (But I'm told I should be in school anyways) So on here... (I'm very impressed NuTang isn't blocked or filtered hehe XD) Although I'm going off now to do some work =3 We'll see how it goes~

<33333

L8r,