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The Out Campaign: Scarlet Letter of Atheism
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In a Drug Haze Dreaming of Better Dayz
Friday. 11.17.06 3:15 am

Well I'm back. Most of you don't realize I went anywhere, but I just got done with the longest day of my life. Even though I call it a day, it was technically 2 days. I was awake from 4am Tuesday morning and didn't finally get the chance to sleep until 12:30pm (just after lunch for those of you like me who often forget which one is midnight) today. I just woke up a half hour ago.

The last 32 (that's how long I was awake) have been a solid haze of agony and severely inefficient drugs. Technically speaking the pain didn't start until the afternoon of Tuesday. I ate some food, which was probably a mistake in the first place considering I had a broken tooth. I was eating goldfish (crunch food, another mistake), and I'm fairly certain I broke off another piece of that tooth. Probably an important piece. After that, the pain went from an occasional aching right after eating, to a solid throbbing agony that I could feel all along the left side of my face. (The dentist said that was residual nerve echoes.)

And I'm telling you it hurt like hell. The only way I could keep from being doubled over with the pain was to hold a mouthful of cold water on that side. (Although it took me several painful hours to figure that out.) None of the commercial pain meds I tried helped. I took (and not at the same time, mind you.) Excedrine, tylenol, and Ibuprofine (probably spelled one or all of those wrong). None of them did jack shit. So I couldn't sleep, obviously, because if I fell asleep the water would fall out of my mouth and the pain would wake me up. I couldn't eat (I tried, and cursed myself for it). And the painkillers weren't working. Not even the Vicodin the dentist (the one who took my ex-rays and recommended I get my teeth pulled) gave me.

So I did the logical thing. I had Jenn take me to the ER. And please God don't ever let me be in serious trouble and have to be taken to THAT place again.

First, I come in, we (my girlfriend actually did most of the talking) told them that I was in a lot of pain (I constantly chugging cold water). So they brought me in, sat me down while they asked questions. They kept telling me to stop drinking water... I kept telling them that if they wanted me to stop drinking they'd better give me something for the pain.

Finally I had to stop drinking because she wanted to take my temperature, which didn't work the first time so she made me sit there, obviously in a lot of pain... and I mean a lot of pain. It was like being kicked in the nuts for your mouth for you guys out there. I was shaking it hurt so bad. Every muscle tensing up with the effort of not punching myself in the mouth. So I had to sit like that for about three minutes (and when you're in that much pain you count every second) while my mouth cooled down so she could take my temperature again. Which apparently told her nothing because...

They sent me to an exam room where I sat for another 15-20 minutes. They didn't bother to give me anything. Didn't bring me my water or any water. Thankfully there was a sink in there and some paper cups so I was able to keep the pain off while I waited for the doctor and my girlfriend and I listened to a woman try and pass some gallstones.

So the doctor comes in. The retard obviously didn't listen to the nurse or didn't bother reading the chart. He walks up to my girlfriend and says "So which tooth is hurting?"

So after we explain to him that I'M the one with the pain what does he do? Writes me a prescription.

I should go back. First of all.. We live in the middle of nowhere. I mean the town we were in was a good size (30'000 people) but not the kind of place with 24 hour pharmacy's. Second of all... it was 1 o'clock in the FUCKING MORNING!!!

Finally after my girlfriend calmly (the poor girl was on the edge of tears the whole night having to watch me struggle with the pain. Which reminds me.. *Makes a note to buy her lots of presents.*) explained to them that there wasn't anywhere we could get a prescription filled in the middle of the night, they gave me two pills which were both tylenol (even though Acetaminophen, the major painkilling ingredient in all the other painkillers I'd taken, had done shit for me that night) with codin.

Needless to say, the painkilling aspect did nothing for me, but the codin made me tired. So I spent the next 9 ½ hours sucking cold water and trying to keep myself awake. Fucking doctors.

God that was an awful night. I won't bore you with the specifics of everything I did. Just suffice to say that I was alone (I finally had to send Jenn to bed because the poor girl had to work at 7am. God I love her.) I was pissed off, I was continually in at least some pain although with the cold water I was able to keep the pain off most of the night. Or at least down to a minimum.

FINALLY, today, my dad (who I also love) called around to a bunch of dentists and found someone who would see me who agreed to either pull the teeth, or if he couldn't to give me a shot in the jaw to numb it. Which is what happened. So I got a shot in the jaw and they made me an appointment to get my tooth pulled tomorrow.

I just now woke up (at around 11, even though it's 12am [midnight] as I'm writing this entry) and so far no pain, even though they said the jaw-number would wear off in four hours. (I got it at 11am.) Which I'm thankful for.

God what a night. And it wasn't like that's all that happened. There was a lot of other stuff going on around that. I missed two days of work, my cat was at the vet getting spayed, there was a birthday dinner for my brother and sister and uncle (their birthdays are all in November) which I also missed, because I was passed out by then.

That was probably the worst pain I've ever had. Worse than breaking my wrist.

Once again on the upside, I love my girlfriend. She was so supportive. Deprived herself of sleep to ferry me around to try and get some relief. When I tried to thank her and told her I was going to buy her lots of things, she says "no no. I was doing my job. Someone's got to take care of you."

I'm still going to buy her presents.

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Music and News
Tuesday. 11.14.06 10:38 am
New music again. Another band whose old stuff I didn't like but whose new stuff is pretty good. Sounds a lot more like 80's rock. Queen especially. This is "Disenchanted" by My Chemical Romance.

Well, seems like the only news is bad news. Although I've been brushing my teeth regularly for the last few months, before that I went like days at a time without brushing, and no surprise here, screwed up my teeth.

I've got four cavities (two of which are on broken teeth) and the dentist is recommending I have all four teeth pulled. Two of them are molars and the other two are my upper wisdom teeth, so both are going to require dental surgery, which I can't stand. And frankly can't afford. Thankfully between myself, my dad, and my grandma we should be able to cover the price of pulling at least the two bottom teeth. The top teeth I'll leave for now and get them pulled later when I can save up some money.

Eh. Except this one tooth, (on the bottom-left) is killing me. Hurts all the time now and I can't sleep. I got about 3 hours of sleep in the last 40, and I've been popping tylenol like candy. And my appointment isn't for another 2 weeks, or more.

On a lighter note, I really do love my girlfriend. Every so often she'll do something that makes me wonder how I ever doubted my feelings for her. (That was more than a year ago, by the way. Back when we were just friends-with-benefits.) She'll send me text messages, usually at times when I'm feeling the most down or apprehensive about something.

For your sake I won't babble on about my relationship. Can't beat love, though. God I can't wait until we can move. Living together will be just the best thing ever.

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