well, yesterday was a good day:).. i dunno, compared to the day before it was perfect. i was pretty happy for most of it. who knows, we'll see what may come of it all. anyways.. now to the subject at hand.. the 15th. No matter how much time passes, its still there. Everytime it comes around, im reminded of it all again. Time may change most peoples feelings, but mine still remain, and always will. I've moved on enough, to get on, but.. no matter what, i still love you, and no matter what im still here....:\

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maggie: OMG!!! are you fucking serious haha omg.. omg no me: lol what maggie: omg that PICTURE! hahahaha me: hahaha maggie: noooo! me: ;-) maggie: HOLY SHIT it will haunt me forever -- to everyone: maggie seems to think the pic of her in my profile is awful, and im betting people think otherwise.. lol let me know.. :p haha how about that mags

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about my riding accident. you see, i went to this horseshow and chance was being crazy there.. like he would not concentrate and chill out, anyways our first class he just raced around the ring and i barely managed to get him through it ok.. like i was leaning back and pulling on the reins and he wouldnt slow.. so we switched bits to make him listen but that didnt work and he just got upset and wouldnt cooperate at all. he wouldnt even canter, hed just start bucking and moving sideways or trying to rear.. so rite before i went in we switched back and he acted a little better.. so i took him thru the course and worked my ass off the entire time to get himthru it clean, without hitting any rails, and we did.. but then since 2 other people jumped it clean, we had to do a jumpoff and on the second to last fence of the jump off, he landed wrong and it made me tilt a little.. then he started bucking and moving his legs all over the place while taking a tite turn, and he threw me rite into this wooden fence, which i snapped because i hit it so hard, and then he kicked my head while bucking near me and ran off around the arena bucking.. someone caught him and i got back on and finished it.. haha stubborn.. or stupid, me:-)... but yea i came out of it ok i guess, a concussion, quite a few bruises and a big ass cut on my legs from the boards.. and somehow i managed to cut my eyelid during it all, but, it ended up arite... A few trainers think i need to get rid of him now because hes too dangerous to be ridden. but oh well, hes my boy, and im keepin him

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i just wish there was more to do so i wasnt always so bored.. blah. what happened to sneakin people in and barely escaping getting caught, and laughin so hard cuz we did the best acting job ever just to cover it all up. and what about our bottles and paper bags down at the hospital lol.. damn we had some good times. Oh, and what about RiteAid.. haha "wheres your fucking head at!!!" i guess we just chose the wrong door.. oh well, it made for some good memories, and some awesome.. library time.. haha. i miss you so much kido and cant wait to come home.

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all by my fucking self.. i hate it so much up here.. i just wanna have some fun or do something.. shit, i cant even stand this right now.

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tonite has been so shitty.. i just wanna go somewhere and get outa my house.. it sucks so bad cuz i just wanna be able to have a serious convo again but theres no one i can anymore.. the people i could talk to like that arent up here.. and theyre never home when i call... i hate this

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