So...apparently my parents have talked about fixing my dad's car (the one that sits in the driveway 24/7), and letting a certain individual drive it. Hm..that's exciting. Now where to get the money to fix it? I'm jobless at the moment and that's going to cost about $400-$500. At least, I think that's what it was last time I asked my dad in July/August. I'm going to ask my mom tonight if she knows an estimate when she comes home from her errands, too. If I had a stupid job, that'd be easy to save up in just a few short weeks. (I could just save up the money and fix the car, but I also need insurance!!) Man, I need a job. I haven't heard anything back from the 6-7 stores I applied at, and I am going crazy here without a darn job.

On the plus side, my legs are starting to look a little toned since I've been walking for about the past month and a half. That's very cool. My stomach is also looking a little more toned too..definitely cool with that. I think I may start working on my arms sometime in the next few weeks. I'm gonna look awesome by the time Ed comes home!! So...I think I've got out everything I wanted to say. Well, almost. But the other stuff is just for Ed, and I want to talk to him about it either online or on the phone cause it's mostly questions.

Pray for the car and that I find a job soon!!!

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So this is an exciting weekend that's coming up. Ed and I are reaching the halfway point in this deployment in a few days, and hopefully it will be his last deployment so I never have to deal with this again. (Maybe I will, maybe I won't, I don't know. But I will always pray that I don't ever have to do this again 'cause it's really not fun..) Esther is also coming home today! . We're going to hang out tomorrow and share some pictures from Bok Towers (mine) and Costa Rica (hers). I'm trying to get my dad to scan the ones from Bok Towers so I can upload them on here but so far no luck. There's two really nice ones that would be perfect with my new layout on here too. Hopefully I can get that done real soon. After we hang out and just basically chat for a bit, we're going to sit on Josiah's Truth Project meeting. I've been to it before and it's really cool, I just can't drive to St. Cloud every Saturday night and again on Sunday mornings. (If I drove myself, that'd be different.) I'm also going to get information about Cornerstone's mission trip. Apparently they've already started having a few meetings for it, says Josiah. I might still get a chance to go though, I don't think they have had *that* many meetings yet. And Esther might come too! Her plans to stay in California over the summer don't seem to be working out the way she'd hoped, but I would love to hang with her all summer in St. Cloud or Ecuador. If I don't go to Ecuador, I'm going to apply for the internship, I guess. (Is there a deadline for that?) I gotta talk to Pastor Karl; I also need to have him redo my reference form for Trinity College cause I lost it when he sent it back to me. This time I'm going to give him a fully addressed envelope so he can send it straight to the school. (That's actually what he was supposed to in the first place, but I forgive him. I didn't give him the envelope like I was originally supposed to, so it's not totally his fault..)

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I just found out early this morning, my fiances tour of duty in Iraq may be extended for another 4 to 5 months. He's already been over there for about 7. I'm praying my fiance's extension won't actually happen, but I have some doubts. Stupid military!!

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So this weekend started out great. Esther came home and we got to hang out on Saturday. We also discussed some of our plans for the next few months-none of them are one hundred percent yet. She gave the idea of me staying with her in the dorms and going to classes with her at Trinity College for a week or two in April. That would be fun-I'd get to see what it's like to be away at college before I'm actually away at college come August/September. She might stay here in St. Cloud over the summer and intern at Cornerstone which would definitely give us a lot of hang out time together-I hope she does that. Her original plan was to spend the summer in California with her grandma and her cousin, but it doesn't really look like that's going to work out. She's still trying to make up her mind though. There's so many things she wants to do. I'm definitely still trying to go to Ecuador; I've got a meeting tonight with the missions group. Yeah, I finally found who I needed to find for that, yay!! Hopefully that works out so I can have something confirmed for the summer.

Sunday was okay-that's when I found who I needed to find, and I got the house to myself that afternoon which was way cool. I love having the house to myself. I did miss bible study though; my parents actually wanted it to be family movie night, but I wasn't interested in any movies that are out right now. Next weekend, I want to see..um, something that I can't remember the title of right now..

Anyways, just when we reached the halfway mark in our first deployment-there's bad news. Ed starts hearing that they may have to stay overseas another 4 or 5 months beyond their originally anticipated return date. . I immediately see the downside to this, but Ed, optimist he is, sees the good to an extended tour in Iraq. He'll have less time left in the Army when he does return, and less chance of redeployment. I'll also get to stay at school with Esther for a couple more months. I still don't want his tour extended though--I miss him so much; I want him home NOW.

Oh, and to top off this weekend, my cat has gone missing. We're not sure if she's run away or she's just hiding, but someone left the backdoor open long enough for either cat to escape. We got Scrappy back indoors, but Addie is still missing.

[Thanx for the prayers ikamashokie, hikarixgaki, and Nuttz.]
{Edit: We found Addie; she was hiding.}

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Last night was my first meeting for the Ecuador missions trip. And probably my last. I'd feel more comfortable going on a trip like this with at least one person closer to my age, and while last nights group of people were great, they're all a bit older than I am. Esther has previously mentioned that Trinity College goes on a missions trip every year for spring break, and that appeals to me more right now for many reasons. Esther would probably be along, and there'd be a few more people closer to my age. I'd also have more time to save up the money for a trip like that; not just 2 months to raise $1500. Also, the meeting last night ran later than I'd've liked--I didn't get home until 10:30, and the meeting started at 7. I was soo tired when I got home, and I missed a possible chance to talk to Ed. I was too tired to get up and online to see if I could've had a chance to talk to him. .
I'm definitely going to get online tonight; I hope he does too.I think I'm also going to try and talk to Esther tonight; I'm going to give her a call. I hope she's not working or overloaded with homework. I want to ask her what Karl said about interning over the summer; I haven't done that yet cause I was planning on going to Ecuador, but now that's not going to happen I may intern at Cornerstone over the summer if at all possible.

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So I found out at church last night that Sydney is going to be having two surgerys, one this month and another next month. I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE when people I know and love are in hospitals..mostly because I can't stand hospitals. I guess that fear comes from the fact that the first person I ever visited in the hospital, my grandma, passed away that same night. Okay, well now I'm scared..and her first surgery isn't until Apr 17th. But that's not really that far from now.. I won't say what the surgeries are because I don't really know, just that it's something to do with her heart like missing a valve or something, and her ribcage needing to be pushed down or whatever. You add that on top of my other worries, the ones about whether or not Ed will have to stay an extra four to five months in Iraq, and I'm bound to be hysterical. I had to leave and go to the restroom after everybody prayed for Sydney just so I could be alone and cry. I was already on the verge of tears before I found out about the surgeries 'cause I keep thinking about something that Ed said while he was here on R&R. Something he considered doing but didn't..I won't expand on that, but I can't stop wondering how different everything would've been had he done it. God, I don't know. I need someone to talk to right now; I want to talk to Ed, I hope he gets online tonight so I can talk to him. I miss him so much right now. Pray for them, okay? And that I'll get some sort of peace in the very near future and learn how to deal with all of it.

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