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dave
Age. 34
Gender. Male
Ethnicity. Chinese
Location Valley Village, CA
School. Cornell Univ
» More info.
Have you tried the Ultimate CN Soup?
294th day of 2007
Hey, quick question for you, dear, imaginary reader: have you ever tried the Ultimate Chicken Noodle Soup?

The answer is "no." That's because I just invented it earlier today, made it, enjoyed it, and the recipe was so powerful and ultimate that it cannot be recreated ever again. However, I will let you know what ingredients I used:
*water (from the Great Tribal Falls of the Cherokian Romans)
*drumsticks (from kobe chicken)
*green onions
*salt
*pepper
*vinegar
*soy sauce
*sugar
*garlic
*broccoli
*shrimp
*mushrooms
*sesame
*seaweed
*noodles

I do not have any pictures to show you, because any photo of the Ultimate Chicken Noodle Soup will cause your computer to suffer a serious meltdown. However, here's a nice cover of Mr. Crowley for you to enjoy:


I'm now all caught up on Prison Break and started to watch the shows Chuck and Big Shots--otherwise known as Chick and Big Shits.

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The Impossible Defense
280th day of 2007
I have done the impossible. And by impossible, I mean that the world's most renown and attractive female scientists, researchers, mathematicians, doctors, and engineers have literally conducted years of research, spending billions of research grants and corporate R&D dollars, proving that this event is scientifically, mathematically, technologically, psychologically, and biologically impossible.

And yes, I have just done it. I have DONE THE IMPOSSIBLE. I have beaten Desktop Defense Challenge Mode -- The 100.



And now, I'm finally free from the chains of this obsessive addiction. I spent countless hours, shortening my shortlived existence, on this piece of shit game trying to beat this mode. And finally, I am done. I am free. I am no longer a heroine addict.

I must go outside and smell the air after I post this entry. I must take a stroll by the beach. I must play volleyball with a shark and rip off its fin to make soup.

In other news, I started watching the new season of Beauty and the Geek; and have been watching The Pick Up Artist these past few days. It makes me think that there may be something missing from my life, but can't quite pinpoint what that is.

AllRespect is about to break 1,000 members. That means I will be taking it out of Beta soon.

I'm excited for the return of Futurama.


You should be too.

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All content copyright by dave. Please do not reproduce, recycle, or regurgitate without the express written consent of the CTU.
Escape of the Thundercat
272th day of 2007
I have returned to the land of lost angels. And, again, I must reiterate that I am the Desktop Defender! See photographic evidence below.


[Note: this be 10k Fun Mode)

So, for the past couple weeks, I was in PA visiting my mom. She recently returned from China... and, among other ancient treasures and artifacts, she brought back the head of Fourface, the four-faced monster from the city of Jiao-joia-jaoiaji. She fought a hard battle to beat down this wicked creature and cut off his head. Observe the prize head:



In other news, the Thundercats have escaped captivity. Yes, in case you haven't heard, in 1974, the FBI the captured and imprisoned the Thundercats. Thundercats are a powerful, hostile, and mystical species originating from Greek mythology, often bred for their ability to produce Nitrous Dioxichloplagmetism, a key ingredient to creating nuclear photography.

Anyway, a Thundercat has escaped. PLEASE BE VERY CAREFUL WHEN YOU'RE OUTSIDE AND REPORT TO THE FBI IMMEDIATELY IF YOU HAPPEN TO ENCOUNTER THIS THUNDERCAT:



I'm so thirsty.

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All content copyright by dave. Please do not reproduce, recycle, or regurgitate without the express written consent of the CTU.
Conspiracy, Death, & Interstellar Cohabitation
267th day of 2007
Today, I create my first Facebook Application. It's called Music like Mine:
http://apps.facebook.com/musiclikemine/ Check it out and show your friends! The application lets you find others on facebook who share your same taste in music.

The second thing I'd like to cover in this blog post is one of conspiracy, death, and interstellar cohabitation. Call it pure, animal-like instinct or call it a silly hunch--but whatever the case, for the longest time, I've known the truth. The truth may scare you. It may hurt you. Hell, it may even kill you.

Maybe that is why the truth, oftentimes, is so far from the cold clasp of a humanoid's robotic, alloy hand. The truth, a young butterfly once told me, is like a young butterfly. I told the butterfly to STFU; then I killed it. When it died, crushed in my robotic, alloy toy-hand, I realized what it had meant.

You see, a young butterfly is not so different from you or me. It's not so different from the ocean... nor from the energy produced by a squirrel chirping away on a beatle. It's not so different, in fact, from the maniacal scream of a kyolic garlic pill that has a small hole on it, which is releasing out some trapped air as you squeeze the pill with all your might.

A young butterfly is a creature of the universe, the same universe we sometimes call Universe. Anyway, before I digress, let me now describe how I came upon this brave discovery of conspiracy, death, and interstellar cohabitation.

I was walking around, clad only in a sheet woven from a dead gorilla's ass hair (because that's what we do in Pennsylvania). I had been traveling all morning, exploring all the glory of the state of Pennsylvania. And finally, at half past dusk and a quarter past dawn, I stumbled across what, perhaps, is the greatest discovery of mankind. Yes, it's true. It's true. It's so FUCKING true.

Now, whatever previous qualms and indecisions you've had regarding conspiracy, death, and interstellar cohabitation... please, lay those aside. What I am about to unveil will explain all to you--and to you, all will be explained (only with regards to conspiracy, death, and interstellar cohabitation).

Behold! Behold the giant space rabbit that fell from the skies--from another planet--to its death and lay hidden, all these years, in the Great Plains of Pennsylvania. Behold the 11th Wonder of the World!

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From CA to PA
257th day of 2007
O'er the rainbow and through the woods to the mystical land of the brandy bush. We all remember that sentence fragment from nothing.

I'm not the most observant--in fact, I am one of the least observant--but, recently, I did observe a few incidents that seemed a bit unusual. And, by observe, I surely mean watch on youtube. Check these unnatural atrocities, you sicko:

1. the chicken-beef


2. the bird of prey


3. human being?




I'm enjoy a short and sweet 2 weeks time off (starting yesterday) in Pennsylvania, home of the Quaker Mill feminized George Washington wannabe. Observe:

A couple weeks back, I moved to Manhattan Beach, California and now, I can boast an oceanview from my living room. THAT'S RIGHT, DAWG!!! Check out this picture taken from my apartment that I found on Google Images when I searched the keyword "ocean:"


THAT'S RIGHT, DAWG!!!!

I'm very excited about the prospect of traveling to Europe for work (upon my return from vacation). I do desire to return to Pana Valley, the beautiful land where I met my lost wife.

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Another Soul for Sale, Oh Well
230th day of 2007
Stardust, stardust, in the sky,
Make my lipped mouth bright and dry.

Those were the last words from the famous poet, Groet. Similarly, those were the first words from the actor, Gractor. Such a coincidence can only coincide without the realm of truth.

And so, it's another Friday night, and I have no exciting plans for the weekend. Mr. Chase has deeply misled my preconceptions of the LA lifestyle that I was destined to lead.



The tale of tall and small is one that has yet to be told at all. The day when prey will prey is... today?

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