Wednesday. 7.25.12 3:14 am
I KNOW that this time next year, things will be different.
I WILL be healthier. I WILL be skinnier. I WILL be happier. & I WILL be different.
I promise, I swear, I KNOW this school year will be different. I won't pig out and lose only some weight, only to gain it all back when I go back home. No, I WILL eat healthier all around this fall & spring semester. I will work out, and feel better about how I look. This has to stop. This is my chance, my time to change how I am viewed by others, and how I view myself.
I love me, and I will continue to love me. And with that said, I choose to love myself so much, that things will change! Jaws will drop, including mine.
And if I am not atleast thirty pounds lighter from now to next year on this day, I owe you, whoever is reading this, 10 bucks! :D
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Wednesday. 7.11.12 4:01 am
I wonder what would happen if I let my heart feel something for him. I wonder how it would feel if I just flat out said "let's try this". I wonder if this is how love is supposed to start, not out of lust or pure attractiveness, but through understanding and hearing each other. I wonder if I mean anything more to him than my title or close friend, and I wonder if I would feel more if I really just let myself feel it.
But as usual, I am scared. I don't want to lose him. I don't want to get hurt. Many people say confidence attracts guys. But I don't feel that I should have confidence. Last time I did, it bit me in the butt, and my heart was broken into a million pieces.
Oh well, I'll just see where life takes us.
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