Finally, I recoved from flu.

I had been sick for more than two weeks, and not realised that I was seriously ill until friend told me that I got fever. I thought I wasn't had enough sleep, so I got headache and tiredness. Alas, how silly I was? And I'll let you know.

I went home to check temp after skool, and find it was 38C¢X, so I thought, not-too-bad. Remembered that fever would be dangerous, if up to 108 degree. Oh, hang on, is that mean Fahrenheit? So I got up to internet, and check about Celsius.

So I really got fever, and what I should do? Little did I know what to do to a fever patient, that is me. I wonder I should go to bed, or shower, or some iced drink, or any other thing? But I was feeling so cold, and want to turn the heater on. Should fever patient stay in a warm place? I wonder. Coz I remembered that mum told me when I was an infant, got high fever once time, but there were no place for me in emergency room, so they took me home and turn the air-conditioning to lowest. AND I recoved.

Don't want to ask mum, so I check on internet, again (izdat means internet saved my life? LOL). Anyway, knew that I should took off some clothes, drink more water, that means keep the temp down. ar-ha ... it is winter in Australia. I better go to sleep.

Look!! This was the moment that I find I was ill. No any mum in the world'd be happy to read above, so my mum don't know here.

And the next day, I really wanted to do something to save myself, so I planned to see doctor. Well, you wouldn't understand how worried I was, I wonder fever'd make people stupid, so I kept pary to God that "please let me recover, I'm not clever enough, don't let me being stupid, amen!" ar-ha ... sadly, I went to medical centre at 9am, they were full appointment, and they don't have any vacancies until tuesday,that means today. That was a wednesday, and I thought, "damn it, I should recover when tuesday come". Yes, damn!! NO medical cert for being absent classes. I was really down.

So, I only attended tuts, sleep for the rest, and recoved. Yeah!!! Such a pleasure moment.

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I'm sooooooo tired, did hips of energy work today!

I still couldn't see the physcial images of angels, I need to work more on clairvoyance exercises.

During the attunment, I can feel the energy moves from my left arm through my body to my right arm, it is so powerful, and the vibration is so strong whilst it came through me, it was amazing, but it is pity for cannot see in physcially.

And due to my undevelop clairvoyance, I couldn't see auras too, but I was told that I have some white light surrounding me, it is said it happened to people who did lots of spiritual practise. OMG! Yes, I do spiritual practise many years, but I am rather lazy, that's why I always want to take aura photo, and if I keep picturing that, it will be easier for me to know the process, and courage me to work regularly. But, I don't know where can I find aura photo taking in Adelaide, I only see ads for selling aura camera.

I also did my first automatically writing, diffeent to other people, I didn't hear voices, but I do see images and I sense it, however, the images were rather abstract, and I could hardly guess right the meaning, especially for the long writing, and it won't move away unless I can get the correct/enough messages from the images, so that makes some difficulties.

And each time when we work with guidence angels, I always see two of them stickly together hands-by-hands, one is being active, always hold my hand and work with me; the others just stay behind and being passive, they both lovely. However, Elisabeth, my tutor said we only have one guidence angels, and what I see is one angel in two perspectives, so it confuss me, coz I ain't sure it was due to my reading of Doreen Virtue said we have two guidence angels hence I made up this image in mind but I eventually have only one, or I really have two guidence angels and my case is special. But my finding is close to what Doreen Virtue describe, each of us have two guidence angels, one is being active pushing us forward, and the other one is being passive and comfort us when we are sad. But, doesn't matter, I see two and I'll work with both, that is.

Sophie, the gal I know in lesson told me that Doreen Virtue will have the Angel Intuition held in November at Queensland, I really want to go, but it is the exactly same day as the exam week starts, what I should do? Could my angels solve this out? I really want to join, I have been reading her books for a year, it opens up my eyes and changed my life, it would be wonderful to meet her and learn from her, and that is what I always wanna do. Show on her website, this course will only held once this year and its in Australia, I wouldn't know when and where it is for next year, but I probably leave Australia and start my career at that time, then time will not be that easy to arrange anymore. But if I see it the other way, I will have a secure financial support once I started my career, spiritual lessons worth that prices but I still need to say they are expensive, to maintain a real life and spiritual developing is the harder thing to most Lightworkers, especially a student like me. Would it be a sign for me that I'm not ready to the workshop until I earn my own money? I dunno, I know everything are safe in God/dess's hand, he/she will give me the best than I could imagine, maybe I should just leave it and see what happens.

Anyway, tired tired tired tired tired tired tired ...

Have a nap after dinner, I know it is unhealthy, but I'm damn tired. So no mood to sleep now, but I still have another lesson tomorrow from morning to evening.

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Another tired day!!!!!

I hardly got to sleep last night, and nearly oversleep this morning, it was luck that I normally set two alarm clock, so I wake when the second alarm rang, I had no idea with the first alarm but I think I turned it off by myself. Then I quickly made my breakfast and lunch, and rush to tram station, but I forgot sunday timetable is different untill I reach the station and saw people waiting, so I prayed to angels to let me arrive on time, I got up the tram at 9:45am, and I arrived at 10:05am, thanks angels.

We did some healing exercise to ourself and to others today, and I think I was really tired or the music made me real relax, I nearly fall in sleep whilst doing self-healing.

And we had two angel readings from different partners, in the first reading, one person sat against the wall, the other person first put hands on her shoulders and tune in, then sat opposit to the person and saw her auras, spirits and angels. I couldn't see much in this exercise, but when I put my hands on her shoulders, I asked which archangels are with her, and I quickly get a name of Rapheal in my mind, and I sense a strong feminine energy at her left hand side, so I guess is her grandma or mum; I felt some other 'people' at the right hand side, but I couldn't figure out who they are. Then when I sat oppsite to my partner, I think I saw some colours around her head and that should be her aura. Then we swap, my partner told me that there is a woman at my right side, since I dun have any female releatives passed away, so I dunno who she is, and two archangels with me, as I remember is Cherubim and Ariel, for helping me with communication and close with nature. But what funny is, she saw lots of black cats surrounding my feets.

The second reading done by a expertiser who is going to be a teacher of this course soon, we hold hands and do reading for each other, I couldn't see much but I think her energies are strong so I eventually see something. I see her aura in green and blue and an advice for her to travel and writing. However, she told me she saw many Goddesses with me, from Jewish, Egypt, Celtic, Chinese and many other, and these traditions are releated to my pervious lives. My grandpa with me happily, and I have a blue dragon as guidence surrounding me. The messages for me is I will have my women circle very soon, I'm happy with this, I always want to form a women circle, to teach and bring more women being spiritual and get ready for 2012, but I must first do more practise and learning before I can do this.

It was an fun day, but I guess I am too tired, I couldn't remember the details.

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Boring!!!

Why life can be bore like this?

Indeed, there is no reasons for me to be boring.

I have all the elements to be happy in life: I have books to read, I have music to listen, I have internet to kill time, I have so many clothes, I have lots of shoes, I have flute to play, I have tv to watch, I have ...

I own so much, but how come I feel not complete, something should be with me, and I don't have it at this moment.

What is it?

No one knows.

Desire is so ugly. It composed the ugly side of human mind, to what extend human world. We grab from others to fulfill our desire, but desire is a bottomless hole, it'll never fulfilled.

We are the only one to let ourselves be happy, with the mind changed, our inner child satisfied, we forget our desire. Everyone knows this truth deep down in their heart. But not everyone know the way to do.

Nor me.

I hate bore, but it never forget me, it always visits me when i really want to be happy. Like now, assignments handed, i have time to do whatever i like, but I don't have mood to do anything, and I feel bore.

I know I am complicated, in one hand I am lazy, no motivation to move; in the other hand, I am not willing to be stable, I want a exciting life, with lots of adventures.

I don't know how these two personalities combined to one, within me.

All I know is I feel bore most of my life.

When people feel bore, they shall find something fun. But i can't, i don't want to move when I feel bore, I don't even know what I want when this happen.

Magdalena said we have egos becasue we are human on earth, and we chose to be live on earth. Ego is not supposed to be fear, it is our friend, we need to face it.

Would it possible that boredom is my ego, I should face it, acknowledge it. I guess there must be some reasons for I often feel bore, it may be work with inner child, or emotion self, and I should find out.

anyway, all I know is Tomorrow is another day, I should have some sleep!!!

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Couldn't understand why I am so tired?
I sleep a lot;
eat a lot;
read a lot of books.

Perhaps I need some exercises,
but I am too tired to do so;
and the weather is too cold.

I draw an archangel card, and it is Gabriel telling me to take care of children.
If my memory is correct, I draw cards about children quite a number of times.
Although I don't feel good with children, I changed part of my mind since I came Adelaide.

Children seems not that terrible in Adelaide.

The card said when I am helping children, I am helping my inner child in process;
I am teaching what I need to learn, whilst I talk to children and their parents.

However,
Archangel Gabriel,
there is no children in my scoial circle!!!!!

And,
I don't have the 'skill' to talk to children.
Most of the time,
they speak unclear,
and I play hard to understand them.

So, what I should know about children, or my inner child?
(my inner child don't know how to express itself?
my inner child wants to talk?)

The only children-thing that I could related is the child care day centre in my university.
I have passed by once, it is a little bit far away from the buildings that I go, and Goddess know how little time I spend in university.

Perhpas, I should find a time to visit there.
Perhaps, I should goto playground, haven't swing for long, not sure where I can find swing in Adelaide.

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I don't realised it is end of Sep.

Sis reminded me mum's birthday is 2nd October through msn, I remember when it is, but don't realised it is day after.

Perhaps this is kind of psychology-avoid to school, as there are lots of work waiting for me to complete. I just now figured out the research topic for contempary Japanese, but I have no idea for media project. What kind of project that I can do in less than four weeks? I might able to do a PR campaign if I have more time to research and perpare, and I don't want to work on website or flash since it takes time and energy. And it is sure I don't have time to take a video.

I should make decision in this few days, anyway!

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