Boring!!!

Why life can be bore like this?

Indeed, there is no reasons for me to be boring.

I have all the elements to be happy in life: I have books to read, I have music to listen, I have internet to kill time, I have so many clothes, I have lots of shoes, I have flute to play, I have tv to watch, I have ...

I own so much, but how come I feel not complete, something should be with me, and I don't have it at this moment.

What is it?

No one knows.

Desire is so ugly. It composed the ugly side of human mind, to what extend human world. We grab from others to fulfill our desire, but desire is a bottomless hole, it'll never fulfilled.

We are the only one to let ourselves be happy, with the mind changed, our inner child satisfied, we forget our desire. Everyone knows this truth deep down in their heart. But not everyone know the way to do.

Nor me.

I hate bore, but it never forget me, it always visits me when i really want to be happy. Like now, assignments handed, i have time to do whatever i like, but I don't have mood to do anything, and I feel bore.

I know I am complicated, in one hand I am lazy, no motivation to move; in the other hand, I am not willing to be stable, I want a exciting life, with lots of adventures.

I don't know how these two personalities combined to one, within me.

All I know is I feel bore most of my life.

When people feel bore, they shall find something fun. But i can't, i don't want to move when I feel bore, I don't even know what I want when this happen.

Magdalena said we have egos becasue we are human on earth, and we chose to be live on earth. Ego is not supposed to be fear, it is our friend, we need to face it.

Would it possible that boredom is my ego, I should face it, acknowledge it. I guess there must be some reasons for I often feel bore, it may be work with inner child, or emotion self, and I should find out.

anyway, all I know is Tomorrow is another day, I should have some sleep!!!

Categories: Adelaide life [t]

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