Ethnicity. Anglo Saxon
Location Sydney, Australia
» More info.
Girls Lie too
Don't think you're the only ones
We bend it
stretch it some...
we learned from you.
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Ummmm...I hate starting subjects
Monday. 3.7.05 9:55 pm
You like the prince charming type.
What kind of guy are you most attracted to? (CUTE anime pics)
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Hee hee...today at uni was good, I guess...
kinda sucked when I went to have lunch with this guy from my tut (purely platonic, we didn't have anything else to do and we were walking in the same direction anyway) and he ditched me half way through lunch to go to the bar with his friends from high school to drink beer and play pool :(
My new friend (I met her at ac prep), Katerina and her friend David, saved me from social embarrassment though and told me to sit with them.
Ugh, I don't think I'm gonna like Marketing Principles or Accounting Information for Managers...I can't understand my marketing tutor and the lecturer is a bad lecturer (he said so himself), boring as hell, puts everyone to sleep...so bleeurgh...and I hate math, full stop. So accounting sucks already. But, Intro to Hospitality and Tourism is good so far, the guy who runs both the tuts and lectures is the course coordinator for my major, and he's good....very dry humour though, kinda verging on rude, but I have a feeling he gets away with it. Management Foundations, the tutor is young and really nice, I think she's gonna try to make it fun for us, the lecturer...hmmmm...not sure bout her yet, she's the kind who might rub me the wrong way. But it's the tutor who really counts, so it seems those 2 units will be fun.
Work was kinda fun tonight, very quiet, until towards the time I left...and Rana was in a very bad mood, she was very snappy, I think she got in trouble about the $400 that went missing Sat night. Apart from that, it was all good.
Uhhh...Cole, don't get mad at me...I IM'ed Brad and we're talking again. He's agreed to call me more, which he's sticking to so far...he called me late the other night and he was gonna today, but he forgot and came online *rolls eyes* and he's gonna tomorrow when I get back from uni. This time I sent him this email, which I told him not to read unless he forgets again and comes online instead:
"Brad, wtf r u doing?? u were meanta CALL me! get to it!"
Hee hee...so he's got no excuse....
We spent like 5 houuurs talking the night when we made up, just going through stuff and talking things out and compromising with each other and stuff...It's SO draining, I don't remember how many times I cried from exhaustion and pain and everything else (we started at 11pm and I went to bed at 4am). I hate arguing with him.
I'm so proud of myself...even though he forgot he was meanta call me, I didn't get mad at him, even though it meant we could only talk for like 20 minutes online instead (i hadda go to work)...I didn't start an argument with him, I just teased him about it and talked to him about my day and stuff...usually I would have thrown a temper tantrum, and him and I would be mad at each other again. Ahh...I only have one lecture tomorrow, Marketing Principles
I like uni. Boing, boing, boing!
Wednesday. 3.2.05 10:06 pm
Everything's fine between Brad and I? I think not.
*Suppresses hurt and pain and anger*
*face goes red*
I think it's time to give up.
Friday. 2.25.05 11:55am
mood: kinda mellow
listening to: the radio
watching: my fish
things are going alright, I guess, I start uni next Tuesday, just lectures, no tutorials yet, so hopefully I'll be able to kinda muddle my way through it ok and make some friends and not be a total loser (I'm thinking I'll prolly be atleast a lil bit of a loser). Brad gave me some advice, hmmm.....according to him, I gotta keep my head up and be confident, wear something that makes me feel good, get there early and talk to people in the lectures, go to the ladies room to make sure I haven't got anything stuck on my face or my butt O_o and be organised....so we'll see. I'm worried that uni might not be for me though. There are already a few things I'm worried about...we don't actually get told what hw we hafta do and how much of it we hafta do, so I'm prolly gonna freak out every 2 minutes cos I'm not gonna know if I'm doing enough or whatever. Also...well, I'm alright at essays and stuff, but I've never actually had to write like a 2000 word essay before, a 2000 word assignment, sure, but not an essay that long...apparently it's something I'm gonna be doing alot of though....so again, I turned to Brad for advice (I gotta admit, he's pretty good at it) and he told me I gotta first do an outline, then kinda fill it out lil by lil and just go back and add stuff as I go, until it's long enough...so that doesn't sound too hard, I'll prolly fuck it up the first few times though...oh well. I'm gonna be one of about 40 000 students on that one campus, so I'm kinda worried I'm not gonna get the guidance and support I need...for some reason I seem to need alot of that, I need to know I'm doing the right thing...but apparently I just gotta talk to the lecturer and find out what kinda work I'm expected to do and how much of it and take good notes and listen and stuff and ask lots of questions...hmmm...I'm good at asking questions, I should be ok.
well...we're talking again, and we've had quite a few good conversations and he's called me a coupla times over the past 2 days, so things seem to be going alright...I'm trying not to expect too much from him though, cos I know he's busy and stuff. The other day he told me he could talk cos he didn't have anything to do that day...his version of having nothing to do is having 1 class, finishing off a couple of assignments and vb practice in the afternoon...hmmmm...if that's having nothing to do, then I can kinda understand why he's busy all the time. My version of having nothing to do is literally that...nothing. If I have nothing to do then I'm lying on the couch watching t.v all day and sleeping and MAYBE doing some housework to help my mum out and walk the dog, MAYBE.
Things are going really well with her, she's a good lil girl...suprisingly she likes spending alot of time outside, she'll actually walk to the back door, whine and then when I let her out she'll curl up next to the door and go to sleep..lol, tis cute. We have a kinda carport thing and then there's stone steps up to like a platform and then the back door...so I think she likes being there cos the stones are cool to lie on...it's been so hot lately, it's yucky. Then when she's done sleeping she goes and plays in her water bowl, lol...she'll literally stand with her 2 front feet in it, kinda bow and get her chest all wet and then splash all the water out with her big paws (you'd be surprised how big puppy feet are). So then, ofcourse, she's soaking wet and wants to come back inside, so she'll stand at the back door and whine and bark and yelp, I'll walk over there and yell at her for getting all wet and tell her it's her own fault and that she has to stay outide, then she kinda whines a lil more and flops down outside the backdoor and sleeps again until she's dry and I let her in, lol. We're leaving this afternoon for Canberra. again, so it'll be her first time sleeping away from home...we're gonna be sharing a cabin with Leony and Glen who have her lil sister, so she'll prolly sleep in a crate with her, so she'll be fine. Problem is, we're not supposed to have dogs inside the cabin... *shrugs* what they don't know won't hurt them. Hmmm..she's so cute, she's lying outside now, at the back door...*goes to pat her*.
Wednesday. 2.16.05 5:19 am
I was in a good mood tonight, it was fun tonight at work, hee hee, I got Chris all riled up cos I asked him if he gave Libby a valentine's day card. He gave me a weird look and was like, "nooooo, where did u get that idea?? Why would I??" Methinks he protesteth too much. Hee hee, all the hosts know he's got a crush on Libby, even she knows it, it's sooooo obvious. And yaaay! I found out tonight that he's doing the academic prep days at uni too, so I'll know someone there, I don't know the room no. it'll be in though, he's gonna tell me it cos he's got it written down somewhere...he's mad at me though, cos I teased him...he'll prolly ignore me at the ac. prep. and not gimme the room no. >_<
Also, I'm starting to come out of my shell alot more at work and I'm joking around with people and talking to people and having fun and stuff, so tres happiness too! AND, Jana banana's in LA as i type and she's not coming back WOO! She was one of the manager's and over the past few weeks I've really started to hate her, she's a superficial cow...I wish that she had stayed at Lonestar and that I had gone to LA though :'(
Things have reaaaaally gone pear-shaped between Brad and I, it's awful. How could something so beautiful and wonderful and amazing gone so wrong? He told me once that he thinks I prolly know him better than anyone else in the world. We had something so special and he's ruined it all by not having time for me, ugh. We shared everything, told each other everyting, held nothing back, were passionate and sweet and caring and tender with each other and now there's so much resentment on my side and so much regret on his side...for all the things I want and need and hope for, that he can't give me...ohhhhhhhh *sobs* How am I going to save everything we had? It must be saved, it needs to be saved, I'm not giving up yet, where there's a will there's a way and I'm sure he still wants me as much as I want him, so there's still hope. Right?
Valentine's Day? Meh! It didn't happen...
Tuesday. 2.15.05 11:18 pm
Brad and the whole Valentine's Day debacle...
Not only was he OVER 2 hours late to talk to me on Valentine's Day, but he was 3/4 asleep, said nothing about Valentine's Day except for "Happy Valentine's Day, It's not Valentine's Day here till tomorrow" (gee, no shit?) and didn't send me anything, not even a measly e-card, we didn't even end up talking till like 7pm, the day was almost over, and he never even offered to call me that night or the next. It's easy to say "Happy Valentine's day" to somebody, I could walk up to 10 strangers on the street and say it to them but it doesn't mean it actually means anything. It takes a lil more effort to send a nice card or e-card and call me and make me feel loved and cared about and given me some affection and attention and stuf...but did he? Nooooor. Valentine's Day basically didn't exist, it was crap, crap, crap...what a fuckwit. It's not that difficult to make me happy, even though I'm demanding, but he manages to stuff it up every single time anyway. Today, his Valentine's Day...that didn't exist for us either. He was over an hour late to talk, then had the nerve to claim it was me who got the time wrong and then told me he had to go eat something and that he'd be back in an hour, even though he knew I had to leave for work soon. He chose eating dinner over talking to me for a bit, I could have only talked for 45 minutes anyway. He was all like, "well, I'm in a rush and you're all mad, so lets just talk tomorrow when we have time". Graaaaaargh! Okay, that might make sense, but he fucked up BOTH Valentine's Days and he didn't even offer to call me that night. I'm a girl, i LIKE Valentine's Day, i thought he'd be a lil more sensitive about it and make some sort of effort. Arsehole. Do you wanna know where he was for most of my Valentine's Day? In LA with his friends...then he claimed that he "lost track of time" when he got home. Ugh, I'm disgusted in him. If I bring any of this up though, he'll make it out not to be a big deal, I can't win. *Kicks wall*
Thursday. 2.10.05 5:16 pm
Your Q Score is: 6
The Q score ideally should be as small as possible, indicating maximum agreement among elements. However, even a tiny Q score may not mean optimal functioning, since all four elements may in fact be relatively undeveloped.
Your Primary Mythical Creature
The main strength of the Water types is feeling. The second element indicates the most probable focus for this emotional expression.
Water with Air
Astrologically associated with Pisces and the Twelfth House
Mermaid types are warm and caring in a passive, receptive way. They are given to daydreaming and to contemplation, a combination that can make them seem curiously absent and fey. They are among the most unworldly of all the types. Despite this they have a strong ability for clear, rational thinking that can be startling. They seem to have a deep, intuitive understanding of the oneness of the universe. They have a desire to help the world at large and are acutely aware of and sensitive to suffering. This is partly because they do not recognize the customary boundaries between people, other living things, time, space, this world and the Otherworld. They are frequently psychic. They can be brilliantly original and highly creative. They are usually regarded by others as benign eccentrics or as plain weird.
Your Shadow Creature
All the Fire types have problems relating to anger and aggression. The weakest element indicates the main focus of these problems.
Fire and Earth
This shadow is prone to a sense of stagnation due to lack of motivation and laziness. Nothing durable is ever produced. Practical activities may never be embarked upon. There is an underlying sense of futility and hopelessness. Disillusionment results from their lack of confidence that they can change anything for the better, and in any case they do not have the will. At the same time there is an underlying grandiosity and even megalomania reflected in their dreams and aspirations. They need to feel special. Instead, they may simply overindulge or neglect themselves physically. The biggest obstacle of weak Earth is to overcome self-centeredness and greed; the biggest obstacle of weak Fire is to overcome anger and aggression.
*Grins* She slept from 10:30 last night, till 6:30 am, then again from 6:45 till 9:30 *is so proud of her puppy*. Compared to the night b4 (she whined and screamed and screeeeched and barked from 11pm till 4:30 am ) it was a dream.
Buuuut, cos she slept so much, she was sooooo naughty all morning, she just wanted to play and create havoc, it was so tiring *snores*, but she's sleeping like an angel now. Sasha finally started to stop ignorng her and actually played with her, kind roughly, but she still played, it was soooo funny, they were on opposite ends of Cleo's tug toy. *Yaawns* It's tough being a mummy.
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