Last night I had a couple of drinks at the Hard Rock Cafe. My eyes were feeling a little weird and all I wanted to do was lie down. When it was time to leave, the bag for my leftovers was on the floor. When I reached down to get it, I FELL ON MY ASS in front of the whole restaurant. It was sooo embarrassing! There was a group of girls celebrating a birthday at the table next to us staring at me like I'm a fool.

I should have never gulped down my best friend's drink like that.

I also broke out into hives. Feels like my 21st birthday all over again. hahaha.

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Sometimes I like how my eye make up looks when i wake up. Like say, I come home and I am way too tired or lazy to take it off that i just pass out. When i wake up, my eye make up is just smudged a little bit of here and there to make it look dramatic and a little smokey. I like it.



But then I'd have to take it off cuz i feel dirrrrrrrrtayyyyyyy! shower time.



-cherry

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I decided to make the same mistake last night and I kissed Addy in front of her boyfriend. Nobody likes me any more. Im being told that Ive become stupid over her and I think that its true. I dont think that its giving me any motivation to change any way Im pretty much fucked. Everyone and their mothers hates me for the shit i caused last night. I should probably care but i dont.
Shes not picking up her phone. I dont care about that either its not stopping me from calling. I think i dont make sense. Right now i want to laugh at this fucking disaster. Sean is seriously bugging right now. I want everyone to just go away this week.
Love
Sir Tommy of Shitland
I Think typos are fixed. This calls for another good times drink.

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You have a bunch of great one-liners.


Too bad I don't hear them anymore.

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Anything special you experienced with him, he thinks nothing of. He doesnt remember anything except that you're just a person he's been with for a majority of his teen years.



So that's that. It's all nothing.

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Maybe I should just throw up my flag. I know the right thing to do is to just forget about it all together. I know if I forgive her, she'll never really understand why we're in this rut right now. I'm not being melodramatic because anyone in a relationship knows that being last place is pathetic when you're supposed to be at least second best. Too many lies came tumbling down this time.

I can't stand how kissing and making up will solve this. It will just sweep everything under the carpet all over again. We'll go through it all again. If not just as much as before, even more so. We'll never get better. We'll never feel better. We'll talk in circles and walk in them too. We'll secretly harbor ill feelings and resentment towards one another. Maybe it's better that we're apart.

I had a dream about her last night. We were together and the only thing that went through my mind, screaming loudly only to me, was "No! You can't let this happen. No!" As much as I want everything between us to be just as perfect as the first time we met, it will never happen. The idea of her and me working things out in the end is just a false security blanket. The fact is we'll never work things out because she'll be too stubborn to admit that something was ever wrong in the first place.

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