I'm sick to my stomach and missing a reading with Leslea Newman that I really wanted to go to, but you can't always have what you want and I've been tired for the past couple of days. I'm sure I'll see Leslea another time. Although, it does seem every time she gives a reading in the area I'm sick or otherwise occupied. However, I decided it was more important to go to the Jobs with Justice thing and the Florence poets than to push myself and go to this reading. Had it been next week, when Allison Betchdel was going to be there I would have pushed myself a little harder because I adore that woman. It's weird when you get to interact with people who you think "when I finally grow up, I want to be just like you".

In good news, which thankfully there was some today, my new chair can get repaired because apparently my insurance company discovered some flaw in a batch of chairs that were sent to Western Mass. One of which, scarily belonged to a kid, according to my repairman. They say it should take two weeks. I'm banking on four because I know these people. It should be back by Christmas at least and I can continue writing the book which I had to abandon while it was being fixed.

I really hope I feel better tomorrow. My assistant thinks I got food poisoning. I'm not sure though because wouldn't I have gotten sick last night? I guess I'll never be able to tell.

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I watched the news. We didn't make it. I'm disappointed. I've decided to join facebook. I went to poetry group. There's a new poetry contest about joy. Cool, because I don't write many hearts, flowers, and love poems. It's judged by my favorite poet ever. I have a check that for $65 that I'll cash Saturday, when I go to a "No on Prop 8" rally also in Northampton.

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I have decided to apply for the Amy Lowell poetry traveling fellowship but not until 2012 your suppose to leave North America for a year which I thought would be a problem for me because of my PCA services but according to their website you can come back to North America for a short period of time should you need to.

I figure i would just try to schedule my revaluation around the same time as my skills trainer visit maybe i could even combine the two experiences (if I get someone from Stavros to be on side and not rat me out to MassHealth- Massachusetts Medicaid) or maybe i can get an extension or perhaps I will just use the fellowship money to pay someone to be my PCA).

I don't know what I am going to do but I do know I want this fellowship. My biggest problem is convincing my mother that the world wont end if I miss one Christmas (2012) we can have it when I get back!

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I deleted an entry here accidentally, which made me angry. I had a doctor's appointment at 2:30. They took about 8 tubes of blood; they are going to run 14 tests. Everything they tested for I could deal with having, accept for lime disease and diabetes (love my chocolate), but most of the test were mineral and vitamin deficiencies. Now big deal there; just another pill. I just know I can't go on feeling like this. Even typing this entry is hard. I keep making tedious mistakes.

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I'm watching Animal Planet show on the frog crisis. More than third of frog species are endangered. A fungus is killing them.

I wrote three raunchy poem in writing group today. I'm not a raunchy poet, but that was the prompt we were given. I'm an obedient poet (at times) so I obeyed.

This is one poem I wrote tonight.

Leslea Newman,
whom I admire
in that 13 year old girl poet who just discovered self kind of way
that any 32 year old woman who fancies herself to be a poet in her own right
ought to have gotten over long ago;
sentenced us- we six gathered to write on the third Thursday of the month
to attempt to craft raunch in the least sexy abode of the library.

Due to scheduling snafu,
our regular room was occupied by a girl scout meeting;
the library's "friends" were holding their own monthly gathering
in the second room we were sent to.
Embarrassed librarian, perhaps herself guilty of scheduling errors,
says we are welcome to write in the staff room until other group departed
.
In October, at local poets gathering
our muses over eager ears fixated
when poet laureate told us that she heard that
we were, in fact, a group that welcomed
a bit of raunch.

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I have opted to stop posting on Yuwie. In 14 months there, I've only made 5 cents. I've made almost 10 times that here in a month and a half. My mama didn't raise no fool. I've written two blogs on today.com, as well as posting on Blogit and Mylot. For a sucky day, I got a lot of work done.

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