MELANIE IS COMING HOME TODAY!!!

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Kurt Cobain said that he started drugs because he wanted to kill himself. If he already felt like and addict, why not be one. People say that you are selfish for wanting to kill yourself, although this makes them just as selfish for not caring how you feel inside your head, and only caring about not getting hurt themselves (by your suicide). You're going to be a waste either way you go, drugs or death. At least if you turn to drugs then all the people that called you selfish for wanting to die get what they wanted (you to stay alive). When you turn to drugs though, those people still seem to be ungrateful for you still being alive and they just badmouth you for your habits. If you would of chosen suicide in the first place, you wouldn't have to listen to them complain about how stupid you are.

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What the fuck do I even have to look forward to? I don’t fucking have anything at all. I can’t do anything, and don't try to tell me I’m handsome or really nice or some bullshit like that, I know it’s not true. I really have not one single thing at all. I cant do this at all anymore, I just want to not feel bad or just be happy, and I cant even fucking do that. If I’m still like this in 2 to 3 months I am just going to end it, there’s no point at all, if you can’t be happy, one of the simplest things in life, then there is no point to life. I want to be dead so fucking bad, you have no idea. Everyone I know my age is maybe not happy, but they’re not sad either, I’m the only person that’s such a fuck up, I can’t even be that. I really just want to go to sleep and not wake up one day. I just sit here hoping that just maybe, I wont take my next breathe…

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I am no one, I am nothing...

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It's crazy how happy I've been lately. It is so awesome, I don't even take my pills anymore because I don't even need them! Life is the best.


I love you and I always will.
It's all so sweetly beautifully true,
just know that I'm in love with you.
Across the sea beyond the sky,
even after we lay down to die,
I'll love you forever and I'll love you again,
I'll love you after every single thing ends.

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I put a new picture of me up in my profile, I'm looking pretty hawt.

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