- I love when exes come up on the "People You may Know" list.

- I can't cut wrapping paper from the roll in a straight line to save my life! Plus, I think a part of Ryan's gift may have been stolen upon delivery. :(

- First Steelers game I've been able to watch all season...and they're losing...dammit!

- Our glass chess set is missing a piece! The cat likes to move them around the board...but I've never seen her take them off the coffee table...dammit!

- I'm tired of bloodwork...more in the morning, which means I'm missing work AGAIN!

-I recently acquired a little blue stone. I don't remember its name...but it's gorgeous, and its energy is amazing. It was originally pegged as a psychic awareness stone, and I admit it makes my meditations absolutely mind blowingly vivid...but other than that it seems to have an odd personality. I'm not so sure it's a meditation stone as much as an enhancer, much like a crystal quarts. It seems to enhance ANYTHING I do when it's with me. Interesting...the experiment continues.

- Last night's Yule, the last of 3, was amazing. It centered around letting go of the pain from the past and starting clean. It was extremely emotional, especially since we'd fought the night before and dredged up a bunch of negativity from each other's pasts. Peachy, right? I screamed, cried...and laughed. That's right, in a moment of release from all my sorrows and bottled up pain and shadows and I couldn't stop laughing. I've cried so much lately I didn't have much of it left..and my next primal reaction was to laugh hysterically while I cried and let go of all the anger, bitterness, resentment, and fear...and laughed some more. We've got more struggles coming before it gets any better, I know. We both needed to let go of stale residue of pains of the past in order to have the strength to seal with those to come. Otherwise, this will swallow us whole. This seems like the perfect time for them to have found a clue to my condition. It's not an answer, but it's hope. Hope that an answer does exist, hope that there's a treatment if not a cure, hope that this will all be okay and maybe I'll be back to normal again soon. Hope may be all we've got, but it's something new.

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