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You be the maestro...



Silence, by unknown
This silence is louder then our words,
More deafening then the shattering dishes and breaking furniture.
Sitting in the eye of the storm,
Silent and still, sending out false promises of a return to normal.

Quietly pleading for an intruder,
Someone to break this silence as the tension grows.
But afraid of the rest of the storm,
This part not yet ventured through.

We go about our lives,
One memorized task, routine, day, after the next.
Days go by and not a word.

The tension, yet invisible,
Makes it hard to breath.
It’s thick enough to cut with a knife,
But tension cannot bleed.

The eye of the storm is passing,
Angry looks shot across the room,
Caught by an angry glare.
As we no longer try to retain out disgruntled feelings.

This silence has been broken,
And now I sit in fear,
Awaiting the storm of words,
I’m about to hear.

We’ve done this dance before,
One fight after the next,
But this is worse,
We’ve not danced like this yet.

Dance around our words,
Meanings set in deep,
To angry to realize the pain our words can reap.

We stumble in our dance,
Step on each others toes,
But we’re moving too fast,
To verbally oppose.
Our dancing words will forever struggle to be heard.
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Panic! At the Disco
Friday. 11.18.05 9:35 pm
Is it still me that makes you sweat?
Am I who you think about in bed?
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress?
Then think of what you did
And how I hope to God he was worth it.
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as you're fingers touch your skin.
I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no you know it will always just be, me

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

So I guess we're back to us, oh cameraman, swing the focus
In case I lost my train of thought, where was it that we last left off?
(Let's pick up, pick up)

Oh now I do recall, we just were getting to the part
Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick.
I hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention.
Now let's not get selfish
Did you really think I'd let you kill this chorus?

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat
Dance to this beat

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster

I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch, a better fuck
Than any boy you'll ever meet, sweetie you had me
Girl I was it look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
Exchanging body heat in the passenger seat?
No, no, no you know it will always just be, me

Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Will you dance to this beat, and hold a lover close?

So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls
Dance to this beat
And hold a lover close
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster, faster
Let's get these teen hearts beating. Faster

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A Poetic Retelling Of An Unfortunate Seduction
Friday. 11.11.05 10:31 pm
The language
In the dimmer rooms
Seems to represent the light source well
How soft they speak
And seem to be at peace
With the movement of the music and the madness
That’s pulling me into this

And the shades of the lamps are woven red
The light, it stains and consecrates
Anointing all forgotten forms
That swirl and smoke
And haunt this place
The girls in gowns all nurse the dark
Pulling it near to their swelling breasts
And watch as it seeps to their hearts
And beats within their virgin chests
And here I know seduction breeds
From wanton hearts that would seduce
And grows and spreads its vines and leaves
Embracing those who might have moved
But now remain to drink the night
From vials black and thick with steam
With intoxicating delights
Would leave you drunk inside this dream
And you watch them take the light from you

And you find yourself on a velvet couch,
Tasting the skin of a foreign girl
Her eyes are black and wet like oil
And she ties your hands with a string of pearls
And you tremble like a frightened bird
As she closes in and captures you to place you
In a silver cage deep within her poisoned womb
So once you’re safe inside, she might let you out
To fly in circles around the room
But its always night and there is no moon
And you wonder if you are alive
And you’re not sure if you want to be
But you drink her sweat like it was wine
And you lay with her
On a bed of blue
And it’s awful sweet
Like the fruit she cuts and feeds to you
~*Bright Eyes*~

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How i feel 2day, Written 11/7/2005
Tuesday. 11.8.05 10:45 am
how i feel today

My heart is sore and torn.
Will you mourn my death?
Slit wrists.
Bleeding harshly.
Cuts deeper then ever.
Skin severed.
From end to end
Every cresent and bend.
Wounds that won't seem to mend.
Are you truely my friend?
Can you comprehend my feelings?
I know you love me, and as I do you.
I know I'm not perfect.
If only you knew the sadness in my heart.
Prayers yet waiting to be answered.
I'll never stop.
I don't want to give up on you.
You were the light in my dark.
You had faith in me when no one else would.
It kills me inside.
Afraid to hide.
I creep back to my darkness and confusion.
Trying to find a solution.
A way to solve these things that trouble us.
How could this be?
Death sounds so beautiful.
Why keep living?
If your fate is fatal.
What if I'm right?
We had love at first sight.
I forever wanna be in your arms.
These blood stained clothes, are nothing new.
My bitten lip, weeps tears of red.
Tears run down my face, and wash them away.
The salt burns.
My heart urns for your touch.
The warmth of your embrace.
The reasurence in your face.
Don't leave me.
I need you more than anything.
You make my soul sing.
Happiness I've never felt.
Scents I have never smelt.
Beauty I've never seen.
A shoulder to lean on, when i need it most.
I don't want you to be a ghost in my memory.
I'd like you to know I'm worried.
Yet I'm willing, and I promise we'll make it work.
By: Mariah Williams ©

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Halloween
Tuesday. 11.1.05 11:01 am
yesterday was awesome. i hungout w/ nic 4 like an hour. then we went to his grandparents house. they are incredible ppl! i couldn't stop laughing! grandma and i really connected, it was cool. that really made up for the lack of grandparents in my life. i miss that. thankyou nic, for inviting me! well leave me sum if ya wanna... no one ever comments on this thing neways. <33333333333
~Riah

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T.O.M.
Monday. 10.24.05 12:35 pm
so its that time of the month. i feel like shit. i wish a guy could feel the pain, just for one whole day. dang it! but hey i got to go home during 4th hour. well actually b4 i went home my dad and i stopped at halloween u.s.a. they had a jack costume for nic. but no, no, no... no sally. so i got jack and got a red/black tint long hair wig... and some pantie hose that have shaped of spiders and web looking things on it. so i think i'm gonna make the dress. get a dress.... one of my black ones probably. then make sum patch work on it. it'll be sexy. grrrr. i'm gonna go to bed now. i called so many places but no sally. gosh, do i love nightmare before christmas!! well leave me sum hugs and mitol haha j/k on that last one. g'day darlings! <33333, ~Riah

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Wow.
Sunday. 10.23.05 8:49 am
My life feels so complete. Speechless.

I Love you Nic w/ all my heart <33333

I'm so happy i have you in my life.

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