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Rambling at past midnight
Wednesday. 3.21.07 12:49 am



Today is just one of those days I float between different and uncoherent thoughts. I do not know if they are supposed to make in the end the image of something larger, something that could give a clue to the goal of my existance, moreso a clue that feels "real". I do believe that, to a certain extent I am aware of what life should lead to, or I had glimpses of, but generally "thanks to" the human skill to drown the spiritual goals into the everyday commonness, I as fast forgot...

When I was a child I was very sure that the dream life is "real" and what we perceive through "reality" is but a dream. I cannot say that that feeling has vanished off, though it certainly lost some polish given by innocent curiosity. I am one of those that were able to "control" dreams to a certain point. I say "to a certain point" because I always had a scenario that was predetermined and I moved the strings of the puppets who made my "actors" into the same stage. I didn't really know what I was holding. I found that controlling my dreams to that extent was depriving them from the freedom to offer me some clues about the life. Which usually happened, or so I felt. It seems but a child's story now but for 3 consecutive days after a New Year's Eve I had prescient dreams about the same day. Not symbolic, but truthful to the very smallest details. How is that to assure you that dreams are "real life" and life but revolves around in a faded attempt to duplicate them...

Another "marker" in my dream life were the ones in 3 consecutive days where I thought myself how to fly. And from there on I always could. With some fears and different backgrounds, but no matter what, the mental awareness that "there is no spoon" was very present in them and doing its job very well...

Finally the prescient dream about a place that I never saw and I was about to visit, a very special place that, to a certain extent, changed my life. Or maybe just got it back on the secure track.

Following my implication in the material life the dreams have become more cryptic or more symbolic. The more I believe in the world around me, dreams offer me a little less comfort. And the general feeling is that I am missing my main frame, the frame that puts me in contact with all the rest of humanity.

Ramblings at midnight or not, maybe this is what dreams are. It's the place we meet everyone and re-make the great connection with the Creation. Whereas "living" is where we convince ourselves that we are separated from everything... I must say, the sadness lies right here. I am going back to sleep, and to hug a person that is certainly my soul link and has totally forgotten...

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» Pierre (174.36.178.106) on 2010-09-03 06:32:09

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