I'm definitely going to destroy myself living like this... but I forced myself into it, so I'm screwed. I'm confused, I'm jealous, I want to help, I can't, I want to be happy, I want her to be happy, I can't be happy because she wouldn't be, and, boy, I'm fucked... Maybe it's a good thing my parents took my stuff away from me...

Things have been pretty lowsy as of late if you couldn't tell. I've been sad about certain things that can't be helped and I've been swamped with homework, too. My slow disposition when it comes to doing work doesn't really help things any either. I've been staying up until about three to finish for the past few nights and it's not helping me any. I fell asleep in math while I was taking my test and only finished about half of it since Jacki started prodding me a few minutes before the bell rang. Mrs. Ronina didn't look too pleased when I turned it in. I also lost my group's lab in Physics so I have quite a few people pissed at me for that.

Well, speaking of pretty lowsy - that's me. I'm a selfish bastard. Yeah, that says it all. I'm not a very nice person.

I'd better get back to my small pile of homework, as it's going to take me a few hours to do as is and I'd like to get in touch with my asian side before I go to bed. (I just got a copy of the newest 12 Girls Band CD.) Yay for classical music. Boo for homework and my existance.

Later, DS
~ "if we could find whos in charge we could kill him... slowly. he prolly has a lot of cash too."

awww, hun. things will get better!
» jamie on 2004-11-02 12:39:48

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