=/ this lonli feeling's getting me... and u know when andru reads this he's prollii gonna get on my case about it.. sorry andru... i'll tell it how it is I've been feeling lonely.

Yes, very lonely. I feel so empty inside without... someone loving me... err luving me. Just once, I'd like to last long enough to say, "Yeah, we lasted for about a year and a half. I don't regret a thing I said to him." I want to be commited to that ONE person, but it seems that... I just can't find someone that.... suits me anymore. I mean, at first, infatuation hits really nicely. But, I want more than just LUST. You get what I'm saying right? I want to feel those butterflies in my stomach when I know I'm about to see him. I want to feel the comfort and the protection in his arms when I run to him for a hug. I want to feel the luv that he has for me when he just gives me random kisses on my forehead or my cheek. I want to feel the repsect that I think i deserve being my own being and having my own beliefs. Why is it when I think that he's the one I want, I end up being wrong. Maybe I'm not picky enough? I don't know, but this lonliness is really starting to get me thinking, when I'm doing homework. For once, I just want... I'm not going to say I was never happy in my past relationships, I was. But I was not satisfied with the results or how we parted. I know, it would be weird to be "friends" with an ex, I could care less if we end up as friends. I'll let the future tell me what happens with that. But every single relationship. I get too nit-picky, I get too flirty, Me, Me, ME! It was all me! Only because I realized it was no use going on when there's nothing left between the two of you. It's not going to last forever, yes, I know. But I would at least... like to try. *Sigh*... Sometimes I wonder why the world could leave people out on something so good... *Shrugs* I guess I should grow up and deal with it that I can't find someone to be compatible with.

BTW That guy that "liked" me... that kept asking me out... liked someone else. So, yeah haha. I don't have to really worry about him lying to me anymore. I don't go for the player types. I'm sick of mind-games. I need a fuck'n man who will keep me happy, not by buying me gifts as if he was buying my love, but a guy that knows how to treat a girl with respect and get along with my family.

That's all. I'm done talking about my sad fuck'n life. Goodbye.

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so for the past two days i've been finding glass in my feet.... then i remember "that little kid at the one party dropped something that was glass.. n i prolli stepped over it trying to get to my shoes before they got the chance to sweep it. damn, it hurt to walk with them in my feet but it hurts even more now that my dad had to PROBE at it with a sewing needle. *sighs* that was torture.. i was hoping there wasn't any left after last night but when i woke up this morning... omg i found like.. five more red spots after i walked to my computer to check who messaged me. Gosh it hurt so bad. But i'm happy i got over that, remmeber ot wear socks =x hahaha... and don't walk near glass when ti's broken. yeah. that's my lesson right there. another issue... lately i've been having this guy asking me out... CONSTANTLY it's.. Weird! O_o!!... cuz... iuno... but we barely know each other.. n he's alreadi trying to spoil me (since it's almost xmas n everything)... he kept asking me what i wanted... im like thinking to myself "what i want is something you can't buy"... oh wellz im not gonna let myself fall for another stupid game. I'm sick of those. I asked my cousin about it and he was jsut like "well find a guy who isn't rich... maybe than he'll know how to treat you.. cuz he'll make something up to make the time with him fun." i started to think about his words. "rich guys can buy ur love... "buy" ur love... but they can't buy u happiness like the way you want it to come. rich guys can buy you everything you want and you could prolli be treated like shit. His way of saying sorry was a new computer or something.. or a cell phone, shoes, clothes" the htought of all that is nice... you know? but no... i'm not a gold-digger... i do'nt like it when guys give me gifts. i should leave it the way it is... but he keeps asking... "what u gonna give me for my birthday?" since his bdayt is dec. 8th. i was lik e"what u want" the first time rah? and he goes "i want you" err.. right... haha he also claims he's neva been kissed... it seems so impossible to me that he's neva been kissed cuz of the way he talks to me... it's so... pervy i guess is the simplest way to say it... i guess imma just get to know him... see what happens... even though i like someone else... =/ been awhile.. but idon't kare... i've learned to beocme picky and patient. might as well put the trait/skill or watever it is u wanna call it to use. aights i'm out hollah cuz i got nothing else to say.. <~ skarie princess mononoke o_O eeeeeeeeee

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whoa.. gv was fun ^_^... met new pplz.. saw pplz i forgot what they looked like (ling LMAO! woops sorri dude)... found stuff out.. not really.. but yeah met new people for the most and had fun with that.. *drools* OMG batman soo hot. *inside joke w/ the TS girls* ^_^... wOo ^_^ my brother said i got darker!! WTF?! DARKER?!?! oh wellz ^_^ haha.. HRm! what else is there to ... oh well z*shrugs* haha.. i'm soo hungry... not. reallly... okay.. so i saw a few cuties at GV ^_^ DIDN'T get to talk to them -_-+ BOOhoo.. haah okay not much more to say so imma end it here I HAD SO MUCH FUN ^_^ let's do it again next year.. =( hopefully. . . T_T

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seem to be stresssing nasty lately.. BLAH BLAH i feel like the biggest bitch around haha.. damnit... iuno maybe it's jsut ME you know... *shrugs* i don't know how else i'm supposed to vent myself.. i think imma go lay down... i just wanted to update..

where can i get jersey dresses for cheap besides ebay?!...

does anyone know?!?!?!?!

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click to get a better view of both
btw i want these for xmas ^_^

OH YEAH!! and the los angelos one has ARM WARMERS!! OH YEAH OH YEAH!! hhahhahaha

and the houston astro's one (the second to last one) there's also the los angelos jersey dress too i just dind't wanan post it cuz it's the same damn link anyway

so who wants to get them for me ^_~ =O jk

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