Hi Nutang. I feel like writing on you again.

Hmm.. so far so good. I need to straighten out my life. Gosh, I had so many plans and it all just went down the drain. No turning back this time, no matter what. I'm sick and tired of falling down, and once I pick myself up, someone else trips me and down I go again. That shit's not gonna happen anymore. >=P

I'm maintaining my grade in Spanish, Chem is pretty much in the middle (if not, lower xP), Alg. 2 is more than okay I think, and X-Age is the same. Haha yay =) I'm going to see A's again. Chem is a toughie tho, but I'll be sure to get some help. Just hope Murphy does NOT get mad at me.

Man, I need to get out more. For my birthday, I wanna have a party at Boomers and invite my friends for once. It's an idea tho. I'll ask people tomorrow if its good =P But for sure I think we're going to Knotts. (My birthday is always big cuz of Lisa's birthday being 2 days away from my own. xP) If we DO go to Knotts, 1) I wanna go on Silver Bullet and 2) I wanna invite a few friends =] That'll be fun right? :)

Haha =] I wonder who will remember.. I'd be extra extra happy and be sure to remember that person's birthday too. That's ONE of my new years resolution.

Hah, AMERICAN IDOL. How funny.

My sister doesn't know how to speak Tagalog fluently now =/ My brother is "eh-ish" but at least HE can speak thoroughly and not stutter like my sister does. Couldn't believe my sister didn't know how to say "hot" in Tagalog -_-; I guess it's cuhz they mostly speak in English. ...but still, no excuses ;)

Oh!! And I think my sister's cat is Filipino cuuuuhz, he likes eating leftover rice XD

Okay, I RAMBLED WAY TOO MUCH. I think I'll make a greatestjournal right now. BYE!

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It's official. I dunno. I'm heartless.

I don't know what's out there for me right now. I feel so alone. I still don't know HOW I manage to keep up with my class work. I guess, self-satisfaction is still there. But motivation? Most of it is from me, and part of it is from my family. It's really hard... to be trully happy.

All my trust in faith and belief is gone. Destiny.. um.. it's there hopefully. And I'm hoping it's a good one.

I know there's one way out of this. I just don't know if it's a good idea or bad.

Please God, help me through my tough times.

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Hahah, I gotta remember this time! Drea's birthday: January 12, 1989. So is Kevin's but.. it's not like we're close.

Oh wow! My parents let me go to a party on a weekday. Niiiice. ;) But yeah, I wasn't really busy. So after a call from Jue Meng and Jordan, I got eventually got coaxed in. Haven't been to a party in a while either o_O;

I got there and I saw those two, a guy named Danny?, and Drea of course. Made her a QUICK card before I left tho. =x (Hey, I didn't even know it was her birthday until the day before =P) We just hung out, ate, talked, LAUGHED, sang kareoke (even I SANG.. you don't see that too often xP), watched people dance to Lose My Breathe. *cough* Will. *cough*, aaaand pictures. Hey, I got picture raped okay. Dunno what was up with THAT. -_-x

But like a responsible teenager.. I left around 9:30. Early enough =]

--

I dunno anymore. My parents love tearing my heart apart. It definitely feels like it when they say they wanna move. I can sort of see why they want to.. but man.. I'm HALFWAY through high school. I don't know where I'll be in 2 more years.. ugh. But there's a lot of things making me hold them up. Good reasons too... at least I hope they are.. and I hope it's still guaranteed.. I want to be the closest possible to CJ... San Jose is like 4 MORE hours away.. I don't know if she'll read this, but I wish she knew how much she means to me.

I have so many things in mind for both of us.. I couldn't think of any other person to share it with. I really hope what they mean when they said "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is true; not the opposite. Hehe.. I was always thinking of surprising her in so many ways (provided I get my car and license of course). I still hope there's a chance for that. I don't want to lose connection.. but the way things are going, I really don't know anymore. I can just hope and pray.. that's about it. Sigh...

I just really wish she tried working things out with me first, rather than me always going after her. That's why I'm so hesitant about being the one who always has to fix things. And I remember her telling me that she wants me to be more "selfish" about her. But truth is, I can't. Cuhz of the fact that I don't want my heart to get broken (guys get their hearts broken too you know, they just wanna be all hard and so people won't get to them), I don't want to keep chasing her if she doesn't want to be chased or even doesn't have her heart set with mine. I truthfully, right now still love her. That's going to be unconditionally too. But I'm stuck right now.. in the middle...

I always had in mind, of going to go surprise visit her... I hope she talks to me soon.. at least by the end of this year..

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Dang. It's been a LONG time since I've written in here. Well, I don't think anybody knows about my Nutang, or reads it daily at least. Just wanna write about events.. especially since it's already 13 days into the new year =D

School
Ah what can I say. I love this semester much much more. My schedule is:

p.1 Spanish 7/8 (Sra. Walker)
p.2 AP Chemistry (Mr. Murphy)
p.3 Algebra 2 Acc. (Mrs. Brookshier)
p.4 X-Age Tutoring (Coach Morris)

and I can pretty much say I'm off to a great start.. except chem xP I'm not doing anything in the class, but I wanna try my best this time on finishing labs. I never once finished any conclusion for last semester. My lab notebook was so incomplete. >_<; But this year, nope. I'm gonna get everything done =]

Spanish 7/8 is so fun! I dunno, I have a feeling it will be. I know only a FEW people in there and I'm looking forward to meet new people... so I could practice my Spanish xD .. Sike. I'm just scared about my speaking skills since I could barely conversate using only pure Spanish words.

Alg. 2 Acc.. jeez, what can I say about this class. Let me try and describe it in words. Confusing (the people, not the work), unique (and maybe weird), interesting, happy, and that's all I can think of. But it's cool cuhz everyone I know is in this class! With an exception of a FEW people. Like 2 or 3. I don't think I'll have any problems in this class. =DD

X-Age. Wow.. so easy! There's so much freedom in this class. I don't know if I'll last 9 weeks though. Thank god it's only a quarter. Hmm.. I have Amber and Leticia in this class. We're assigned to go to Howard Pence. Our first tutoring was today too (we had to get check for TB so we could go on Monday through Wednesday). Haha, I had 2 students. Artchie and Anthony. Artchie was in the 2nd grade and man can he read and write. o_o. What startled me was he chose to be with me and another kid wanted to tutor with me. Anthony is in the 6th grade. He seems pretty cool. I thought he would be a handful since when he walked in it looked like he was about to hit someone. But most of the time, he just read a book which I had no clue was. We get out at 3.. so I thought that was pretty cool. Wish it was 2:30 tho.. =]

I'll talk about Drea's party tomorrow or later on cuhz that was fun =)

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Sawp guys. I think ima start posting here once in a while (I'm still keeping my Xanga.) Anyways, today is a Sat. I'm hella bored. I have guitar practice later so that's just one thing to look forward to. Gotta do homework too.. homework is so much bs haha. Oh yeah! I'm liking this pre-made layout that they have. Xanga NEVER comes up with this stuff. Boring Xanga =) .. Now I'm off to add ppl I know on Nutang on my friends list hehe.

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hmmm.. I haven't been really writing in here but I think ima switch pretty soon. Xanga is getting PRETTY boring (being persuaded by christa). Visit mine here in the meantime.

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