well as i've sed before, not going online has done me a lot of good. it has helped get my mind off things. for example howe me and my "best friend" dont talk ne more. becuz he's busy with school. altho i think its more than that. thats jes the way it is. and i guess i jes gotta let it go becuz i cant do ne thing about cuz i've been trying to talk to him. but he dusnt seem to put much effort. im not bothered as much ne more. guess im getting used to it. the whole deal with friendships can get complicating. i can't beg or ask him (or ne1) to be my friend (agen). if he dusnt wanna talk to me..then so be it. i jes find it odd becuz he was never like this before wit his other gfs. he'd still talk to me.to us. but not ne more. things have changed...i kno that every1 changes..but its so "funny" becuz he'd used to say how he dint like change..and now he's the one thats changing..i dont think he realizes whats happened. he sez he sees how we dont talk. but yet truly he dusnt understand, he dusnt really see it as much as he sez he dus. he jes doesnt. cuz if he did...he woulda done sumthing..at least TRY to make it better. but no. things changed. but during this change, nothings changed for the better. one day i hope he realizes wha he's done. cuz if not..he lost a lot..and this will prolly be the last words i say of this subject. becuz i wont let it bother me. i'll jes let it be. cuz there's really nothing i can do cuz..it takes two.

__last night/REALLY early this morning...i talked to jayrell whom i haven't talked to in forever. and it was great talkin to him agen. its funny how in jes one convo..he becomes one my closest frenz..for sum reason it's easy for me to kinda open up to him. so we jes filled in each other wit whas goin on wit our lives. and he told me the story of how him and aireen got together..and it is jes THE cutest story!..i SWEAR..it's jes like a movie..a really good love story...it deals with guilt, betrayal, secrets...i was like..wow wen he told me. and thats also why he likes to tell the story..becuz thats wha he thinks too...its jes like a movie. its like so sweeet. hah guess u can tell imma suckah for love stories/romance ahha. and so yeahh..then we talked bowt the past..((well actually talkin bowt the past came BEFORE he told me of the story of how him and aireen met hahah..but that dusnt really matter))....and i remember he used to be super quiet in 7th grade..and 8th grade kinda. he's really changed too. i think its a good thing tho...since now he's not so quiet or shy..hahah so its kool. ..it was koo hearin from him agen..jes like old times..well..not quite..hahah..those silent fone calls..i was so mean haha cuz he found out en i kinda told me he used to annoy me..and so i hurted his feelings. hah yeah i think i was a bxtch in 7th and beginning of 8th grade..forreal. cuz of this other thing but i wont get into that. hahah so yeahh jes thot that was interesting..yeah its called k.i.t...sumthin ppl should learn how to do.

_|today i woke up late. since i slept late. en i practiced the piano for like more than an hour..hahah..ges it can get addicting..then my wrists started to hurt..i wish i was super good en could play those super fast songs..and i wish my hands were bigger. hahaha forreal. ..oh yeahh last night i was talking to shaina online..and hm i was wondering wha shoes i should go...DC AVATAR...or those vans C4?! pleeease tell me ppl! i needa kno which one looks best on me! yeah. well i guess thats all for now..hm i havent written ne long entries like this in awhile..hahah well yeah kae ciao!

++edit [6.11pm]
got done wit piano lessons..and finally yay imma learn a neww song!..its called "valse o.p." ((and sum number after it))..and its a really sad song..cuz my teacher sed there was a movie that went wit it and the guy's whole family died except for him..i think in a war?...so thats why he wrote that song. yes, very sad. but its nice tho.

hmm, I have to look into that (re: comment)
I thought it did change all the text.. I'll check up on it on Monday
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» James (201.252.254.98) on 2011-07-08 09:03:25

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