I was watching "The Situation with Tucker Carlson" on MSNBC and that was just too funny. He was going over all these crazy stories..

1) In one middle school a kid hated his teacher so much that while talking with the teacher at her desk he induced himself to vomit. He proceeded to projectile vomit all over the teacher in front of the class. The police, however, have arrested him and he's being charged with assault.

2) Late one night in LA two women left a bar both drunk. They reasoned in their inebriated state that driving their car home would not be a good idea. So the two decided to push their car home. One woman pushed from the driver's door steering the car while the other woman pushed from the back. Along their trek home they hit a parked car. The police, which happened to be nearby, arrested both women for operating a vehicle under the influence. This is spite of the fact that the car's engine was off.

3) In Florida a man recently had to have his foot amputated. The man decided he wanted to keep his foot and took it home with him after the surgery. However, the man stored and kept his foot in formaldahide in a bucket on his front porch. Several weeks later police in the area received tips that a man was showing people a severed foot on his porch. Acting on the tip the police showed up with a warrent and took the foot into evidence. It was later that night that the man returned home to find that his foot was taken. He called the police to report his stolen foot only to find it was the police that had removed the foot on suspicion of foul play. After a DNA test the foot was eventually returned to the man.

Those are just crazy, funny stories. A non-funny, but still crazy story is a grandparent I saw on the news that is suing Rockstar and Take-Two over GTA: San Andreas. The woman claims that she bought the game for her 14 year old grandson only to learn now that the rating has been changed to Adults Only. She is suing for her money back and for damages resulting from the game. My thing with this is the fact *she* bought the game for a 14 year old. The original rating of the game was for 17+ anyway. She doesn't have any reason to complain.

That's like a lady I heard that was mad after taking her 11 year old son to see the movie Titanic, he saw exposed breasts. She apparently forgot to notice that the movie was rated PG-13 and brought an 11 year old. How is that anyone's fault but her own.

I came up with a good idea today for a database system name. Someone should make a DBMS named "Savant". It could go head to head with Oracle. And the theme song for the Savant advertising blitz should be spearheaded by songs from Prodigy. That'd be cool.

---------

Ok. Now to give a recap of my summer, life, everything in general. Right now I'm in Bethesda, Maryland. I'm an intern at a data warehousing and analysis company named EmpowerIT. Its a small little company, but they do business with many big named companies like Coke, Pepsi, Kraft and others.

So, my job has consisted so far of programming a program for RJ Reynolds Tobacco. They want a program that allows them to create reports and analysis functions on their sales data and their competitors sales data in the military sales region worldwide. I'm writing it in Visual Basic 6 (don't get me started on that) and the databases we're using are Access and MySQL. I hate Access. It's slow and it has this arbitrary file size restriction of 2 gig. Which I've never considered a short coming until now, when the data we're working with is a little over 4 gig. Linked tables have been my friends in getting over it.

There are some interesting people that work there. I predict rants in the future about a select few of the people that work there. Especially the gossip queen that sits next to me... gawd. She is annoying and creepy and double crossing. The other day, and I'm not making this up, she was whispering to Chris (another one) and she was like "I know.. Jason doesn't get it at all, it just looks stupid." Then about 5 minutes later Jason walks by and she says to him, "Great flyer you sent out, I really like it." Yeah.. that kind of person.

Later.

I REMAIN IN LOVE WITH YOU CHRIS PALMER!!!!!!!!
» Crustache Mcgoocherson (216.230.10.131) on 2005-07-29 07:51:05

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» thecav on 2005-07-31 04:45:46

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» Heriberto (202.108.50.70) on 2010-09-02 09:23:27

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