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Speak to My Finger
Meowing WAR

Books I have completed reading since January 2018:

1. No Man's Nightingale - Ruth Rendell
2. One Day - David Nicholls
3. The Door - Margaret Atwood
Whose innerself?
Tuesday. 3.4.14 5:36 am
He is the third Japanese celebrity that I dreamed of.

We both were lying down on a single bed in a dormitory like. In front of us was a tv. There was a third female person in the room with us and she was lying on his bed end. The earlier part was a little fuzzy but I think she and I were talking something which I exhibited my maturity. That's because he suddenly said he could then asked me for advise. I looked at him with a puzzle look because I did not realise he was listening to our conversation. He suddenly asked what do I think of him having a simple straight shoulder length hair cut like the female on tv. I went gag. What? You were asking me such nonsensical question? I replied didn't you have such hairstyle before? He said he had but what about again. I actually wanted to reply him that he looks just fine with his current hairstyle. Why the change? I also wanted to shoot him to ask someone else or ask his hairdresser but I clammed up.

He seemed to be quite comfortable talking to me that he was now hugging like a bolster as he lied on the pillow, facing me, talking to me like how a couple having bed talk. Yea, that was what I felt.... Then he asked why was my sister single for a long time... I was really confused. But I answered diplomatically that she is now going steady with someone. He actually mumbled that he could not because he could not leave the house. Then he suddenly switched to why was I single for a long time.

I looked at him across from my bed in silence. I did not know what to answer, but as if I could feel his feelings, and I feel sorry for him because no matter how much he yearns for a life partner, I am not the one he is looking for. Even if I said yes because I am a great fan of him, he will definitely feel it is not the love he is looking for from the relationship. We will be good friends who are connected in spirit. We are never meant to be lovers.

And later... I realised his former group member mates were also in the dormitory and I just missed them coming out from the toilet!


And they just finished showering!

Anyways, it was a sad dream. I think I have to control my dreams as I think I am entering people's consciousness. I think why I dreamed of him is because one of his besties left the entertainmeng agency that he is affiliated with yesterday. It must be a shock to him.



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