The event I have been involved is finally over. Now I can finally focus on regenerating my blood.

Yes, I had blood loss due to the failure of the part I was put to charge, because it didn't happen at all due to time constraint. I put in a lot of effort in planning, and wanted to execute it so badly, and yet my heart was not only broken but almost burst due to the adrenaline rush in troubleshooting the problems throughout my segment.

We were behind time by 2 hours. And the emcee did no kindness in limiting the Q&A session. If not, I will still have time to salvage for my segment.

I hated that moment especially when my judgment was put into a test. I believed I made the right decision swiftly, but I felt helpless when everyone was awaiting my answer in solving each presented problem. I had initially made a decision to proceed with a drawing segment, but feelings told me otherwise. I was lucky to have asked my roomie because she answered me honestly. I canceled it, alas.

Sigh.

And my fellow secretariat members said good job to me. I felt like pulling my hair and say "It's a total failure."

I'm not sure if I wanna be in charge of the discussion group next year, but this experience has certainly built on my experience and portfolio for my ultimate goal.

I will be certainly extremely bitter if I have not told myself: I take it (every problem I encounter in this program and committee) as a challenge.

Phew. Thank god I had ingrained such belief in myself prior to the program.

Maybe I should be a vampire next.

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