What did i do to let you down? what keeps stopping you from coming closer? now, think about this for a second.

was it something i did, or is it you?

are you the one that is fucking this up or am i? i know we both are. you think i keep giving up on you and i think that you never had any hope for us so you don't bother.

i don't get that. are you trying to keep yourself from me hurting you? what about how much you are hurting me by staying away? don't my feelings count for anything? Can't you see that we are both unhappy by staying apart?

i can't promise that there won't be any more pain. and the truth is that hopefully we won't be the ones to cause eachother pain. my hope is that any pain in the future will be caused by life around us. i don't want to hurt you. and i don't want to let you keep hurting me.

but wait, aren't you a masochist too? so, why are you so afraid of pain?

ugh, i am so tired of trying to mash this out by myself. the reality i have no idea why you stay away from me. but i am sick of it. i don't deserve to be neglected by you. (ps, everything you do with out my knowledge or with out my input does not count as interaction).

i am so tired of you not explaining everything and leaving me to guess everything. i don't even know your eye color and i am sick of not knowing you. if you don't want to come closer, fine.

you gamble on everything but me, and i am tired of it. if you won't wake up and realize that your life is passing you by why you dwell on making any sort of decision, you will be an old man still staring out his window waiting for happiness to knock on your door.

i jumped. you didn't. i jumped again, and you did nothing but watch me hit rock bottom.

After this, take comfort in knowing that next time, the ravine you choose won't be as wide and you will actually succeed in jumping it.
» Causalien on 2007-03-21 09:55:39

thank you. that helped.
» mygreatescape on 2007-03-28 02:54:12

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