and then when i open my eyes i realize that i am still alone. you tell me that you care but you aren't coming anyways. that really sucks in case you didn't know. how am i supposed to react? am i supposed to give up on you too? all i know about you is that you don't trust me enough to actually get to know me, so you research everything about me instead. i keep wondering if you are more afraid of ruining the person you have of me in your head or that i will do that to you. i wish you would let me have a say in this whole thing. i wouldn't keep things from you if you let me know that you wanted to know everything. i wish you wouldn't hide behind the future you have plans for as way to keep me away.

afterall i am single. i have no boyfriend. i want to date you, but you won't come any closer. all i get are emails full of puzzles and a shadow. i am scared of you. it scares me that you have no limit as to the extent you will go to to get to know me your way. i am scared that if you did show up you would still be hiding from me. maybe you would even lie to me. i am sorry that i thought you were him for so long. i have an idea of who i think you are, but i want to know; not guess anymore.

if your plan is to haunt me until you feel like coming around, or because your PR is doing well and it will be time to settle down, don't bother finding me then. if you don't want me in your life; leave. life is never conveinent and the news is what you make it. i want to be more to you than a secret. don't expect me to wait around to wait for your life to begin. i have my own to live. and if you don't want to be a part of it, so be it. i am stronger than you.

wow, that's really deep...

i hope he'll come around soon--very soon, because unless you love him, which i doubt is possible since you barely know him at the moment, he's not worth waiting for.

why dont you try confronting him about this issue pnce and for all? tell him if he continues to run away and hide, he's not worth it, you wont wait, and you'll find someone worth your attention, because i trust that person will surely come sooner or later =]

L8r,

—×Kuri×—
» Kuri on 2006-09-01 04:29:22

I'm glad you've come to this conclusion. If you know this to be true, there's no need for such depressing entries anymore. No need to dig deep within yourself to find answers. Come out and see the world. No need to ask and try to find what life is about. Don't wait for us to find you. Take the initiative.

We're here and waiting. And we care. ^-^
See ya!
» Silver-dot- on 2006-09-01 04:45:16

Sorry, you do not have permission to comment.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.