how am i supposed to move on when he was the only one i wanted to keep? how am i supposed to notice men looking at me when he is the only one that caught my eye?

how can i stay when i know he isn't coming? how can i move on when i know he can hear me? how can i believe that he cares when he leaves me alone to cry? how can i believe he will love me later when he leaves me now with out a word?

if he is willing to leave me at the slightest sign of difficulty, what keeps me from thinking he will leave again?

all i know is that he isn't here. i don't know why or if that will ever change. all i know is that he has left me again. i don't know if he will ever come back to me. --if he was coming back, he would tell me not to forget him. and he would come back.
but he doesn't want my love now. that is what i know. and if he doesn't want it now then he doesn't deserve me later. i am tired of waiting in the dark while he pushes me away.

he must want me to move on since i still have not heard a word from him about what he wants. is he so cruel that this is some sort of test, or is he trying to get the easy way out? if he doesn't believe my sincerity of love for him now, then no matter what i do, it will not change. he won't let it. he doesn't want to believe that loving him is possible. and he is afraid to try and love back.

if i am in this alone, it was nothing but a waste of my time. and knowing that makes it easier to walk away and not look back. maybe he doesn't want to be happily ever after. but i do.

and maybe someday i will find someone willing to love me back. that is all i could hope for.

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