all you are to me is messages in my inbox.

you wanted it this way.

all i am to you is a creature in a zoo you made for me.

maybe i didn't realize how you work. maybe i am overestimating your ability to feel. or care. maybe it's not all your fault that you don't care, but it's your choice not to try.

you are from the dark side and so am i. that is why i thought it might work.

maybe it's better like this. because it would hurt to know that you can't really ever love me as i would you. i would have been grateful for your admiration and appreciation and what ever else you could manage. i would have been your biggest fan.

and maybe it's time i accepted that you will always keep your distance from me. because all i am to you is a hobby.

so much has happened that it is not correct to call you a stranger, eventhough i don't know your voice. and maybe i won't understand why i have thought you were someone i loved once for so long. i won't ever understand why you let me.

but now all i see are the lies. and all i can remember are the twisted memories of a guy i spent two days with once.

i have meant nothing to either of you despite my efforts. and that is my problem, i was trying to tempt fate when you can't pick who you love.

and worse, i can't control who loves me back, no matter how long i beg.

i get it now. he hasn't come back to me because he has no desire to. and you were never interested in actually getting to know me.

so, there it is. trajic as it seems, i feel better knowing what you have been trying to tell me this whole time.

i am not the one you want.

Sorry, you do not have permission to comment.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.