damn, Ryan cancelled so it looks like i won't be hitting up LA tonight for Pan'ts movie. (kicking rocks.) i really wanted to go, but what can i do since i refuse to go alone. and that is where i am at. and that is just it, if it's not him, i am not interested. this poses a bit of an issue because he can't seem to make up his mind about what he wants to do with me and i just wish he would call so i could hear him say, "water." but apparently that is TOO much to ask. he has no reason to fear me and i can't wait until he sees that. aside from the fact that i just remebered i have another midterm tomorrow in Econ, i am totally exhausted and would not be at my best. i am just pissed that now i have to tell pants(ps, email him right now), i won't be coming. i don't think he has hired some one and i want to know why!? he should hire me, i have decided. but how should i ask? hmm i will have percolate that.

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