A friend once ominously told me, "there is no such thing as a true nice guy. There are just normal guys with acceptable faults."

That statement upset me when I first heard it. Now this friend is not a guy hating feminist, this friend is actually a guy. This is a guy whom by most counts would be considered a nice guy, a romantic guy even.

"But I know many really nice guys", I said.

"Its all a pretense! They want you to like them that is all."

I felt indigent for all my nice guy friends

"You don't know what they get up to behind your back, I'm a guy, I've seen all these nice guys being themselves"

Then i remember the nice guy who cheated on his pregnant wife. Another nice guy who was terrified of getting caught with his affair. The other nice guy who still wants to be a swinging single at heart despite an impending marriage. The nice guy who is way too cheeky because he can get away with it. The nice guy who is so flirty but "I don't mean anything, I'm just being nice". Or even just the nice guy who has a fiery temper once your back is turned. I know of these people. These are all real people.

All these Mr Nice Guys, so likable by everyone around them but somehow doing not so nice things. After all Nice Guys are human and make mistakes too.

Which validates my friend's statement, there are no Mr Nice Guys.

Hmmm, I hope he is wrong though.

I think this applies on a greater scale to people in general. And even more than that, I think sometimes it's hard to judge whether someone is "nice" because -- first of all, "nice" is such a vague adjective. But also because people make mistakes, and if you take that one mistake and make a generalization about their character, you're doing the wrong thing. I know for a fact that I've been an asshole, but I'm working now to turn that around (and a lot of other things, too). So does that make me "not nice?"

You can't please everybody in the world. To some people, you're nice, and to the people you don't try and please, you can be mean. Nobody really knows everybody else well enough to be making these kinds of judgments, I don't think.
» The-Muffin-Man on 2010-02-05 04:36:10

I said "I think" a billion times in that comment...lol sorry. It really makes no sense. I'm just babbling...dont mind me!
» The-Muffin-Man on 2010-02-05 04:36:34

i agree with whoever your friend is. It occurred to me yesterday while on the train that even Hitler could be considered a nice guy to his mother
» Koban on 2010-02-07 09:18:38

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