Earlier today I take the dog out to play in the snow. There's a guy driving by in the parking lot who apparently thinks the 20+ feet he already has aren't enough, because he won't pass until he has the foot and a half I seem to be taking up. So, I step onto the grass for a second, right onto a big pile of dog shit because the people in our complex are assholes who can't pick up after their dogs. Great. I come upstairs and put the shoe in the shower until I can get to it.
The day passes, I almost forget about the shoe until I get ready to take a shower. Ok, I figure I can clean it before I shower. The poo has now formed a rock layer in the tread, but a little toilet paper should do the trick. I would just soak it in a little water, but the sink has been clogged for a week from Chris and Chad shaving, and no one but me seems to notice. Great. I go to get the toilet paper Chad keeps in the medicine cabinet, but it won't open because since he's added his stuff to the cabinet not only is it full to capacity, but there's no organization to it because his things keep moving. Wonderful. The door won't budge.
As I start to try to work the door open, the track starts to pull up, and the left sliding door pops out of the track. This can't be good, I think to myself, and start to ponder whether or not to try and fix it, or maybe slide it over so it doesn't fall out. As I'm doing this, I reach for the toilet paper because, well, my shoe is still covered in shit. As SOON as my hand clears the cabinet the left sliding door frees itself from the track and plummets towards both my face and the dog, who is haunched up intently watching the goings-on.
I scream, because I'm startled, kick the dog out of the way, and pull us both back against the door as we're showered with shattering glass. I'm still not sure how the both of us escaped uncut, but we seem to be intact. Once I got some clothes on and got all the glass swept (sweeping glass off a tiled floor is not an easy task), I inspected his feet to make sure there was no glass stuck in his pads. They seem to be ok, but all it takes is a tiny sliver. There were no traces of blood, so I think he's alright. Still, I'm a little shaken up and pissed off that it took up such a large chunk of my night.
I finally got my shower...and now I'm thinking bed soon....

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