Feeling much better after a good night sleep. I thought about what happened yesterday.

i detest lip service

i dont understand how you can not be truthful to a true friend and say things only what everyone what to hear, or by some ethical 'rules' what we should say to them

the only ethical thing i know is if she is our friend the more she need to know the truth

i hate being binded with the "dos" and don't" of life. Do we really think we know whats right and wrong in life? Who are we to to tell someone whats right and wrong?
I dont like to say things which everyone thinks is the safe thing to say. After stepping into the society i realized people can say things to get themselves out of trouble, "i'll say the 'right' thing, later if anything gone wrong i wont be pointed at and be blame" everyone wants the safe way out. I do that too, to other people but not my true friends


Anyway i guess what saddens me big time is the big miscomm between me and a good friend, maybe all along there has been a miscommunication. I guess my breakdown has been accumulative. Seeing the person everyday doesnt make you understand the person, teasing and taunting the person doesnt represent communication either.

My friend can continue to be judgemental about me, which he always does, forming opinions of what he thinks of me rather than listen to what i really thinks. To this friend im always so one-type, and starting yesterday i've acquired another quality to my type, im also this selfish woman who cares most about her own happiness.

well..I can't be bothered anymore, im not doing a good job as a friend to this friend either, so as long as you are happy im happy.


got lil ning birthday to attend...at least something cheery coming up.

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