well things have "gone back to normal" and its bleh..... you know when people put those masks on to hide everything from the world instead of jusst facing their problems head on-------------------->>>>>>>>>>>>MY FAMILY!!!!!!! but i guess thats how it goes huh.... im never going to do that in my life... sure i mean ive learned that facing your problems is definately harder then hiding them (or at least convincing yourself that your problems are hidden even tho everyone can see right through you), But you are so much happier in the run.... even to admit you have a problem takes this huge bolder off your chest because hey.... all of a sudden you don't have to be perfect anymore.... its funny that way huh.... how most spend their whole lives trying to be someone they aren't just to be who they "are"..... instead of just being..... its like we live to lie.... but then dont understand how when or house built of bricks wont stand on our paper and glue foundations..... you ever wonder why so many marraiges fail..... why so many want to commit suicide when its supposed to be the happiest time of year... why so many sit there day in and day out doing the same old thing for a little but of money just to barely survive.... why do so many get stuck and caught up with trying to be their hero, why not be a hero yourself? dont get me wrong its not bad to have people to look up to, but when we do everything including altering our physical appearance to look walk and talk the way they do and why, just to cover up our own messed up little lives and to try to drop our own socail problems only to pick up a whole new set of them...... why not just be...... i dont get it.... i mean the fakeness.... and you know whats funny, i used to be one of those people...... anyways.... wow................... i got really off subject............ well im outta here in 24 hours, im going to the onething conference at International House of Prayer in kansas city before i go back to the bay from where we will kick off this years consumed conference,........ the first one to go nation wide........ its gonna be...... really invigorating and exciting...... even if its just to know that im not doing the same plain boring old job for minimum pay, or even maximum pay cause really im doing this for very little if any monetary value... but anyways i gotta sleep cause i wont be able to tomorrow night..... much love out there for all the support and i hope everyone had an amazing christmas........muah

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