listening to: Everything by Michael Buble
mood: happy

Baby has recently moved out of his house near the university and started renting a room nearby. He seemed really eager to move out to have his own room. I am not sure if I am the reason he moved out but he told me that he had been thinking about getting a room by himself for quite sometime. He said he wanted more privacy and more time to study.

Frankly, of course I am glad that he moved out. The main reason is because his ex just stayed in the next room in his previous place. Talk about insecurity and low self-esteem but I still think his ex is gorgeous and he shouldn’t be with me. And they can be together again anytime. Ok, I know, I shouldn’t put myself so low. The second reason I’m glad that he has moved out is, I can finally have some quality and one-to-one time with him. I can finally hug him into sleep and have naps in his room in between classes. Hehe.

So, I volunteered myself to help him with the moving. I even happily cleaned the floor for his new room while he was away moving his stuff from his previous place. Just as I had done with the cleaning, I stumbled upon a mini cabinet on his table. Maybe it was out of curiosity and I didn’t think much about the content of the mini cabinet so I casually opened it to have a look.

When I reached the last level of the cabinet, I saw some pictures. Yes, pictures and how people always say picture says a thousand words, I regretted checking on the mini cabinet. I saw some pictures where he was hugging a girl. Ok, maybe not hugging as I didn’t see very clearly because the moment I saw those pictures, I closed the cabinet promptly.

It was clearly that they were the ‘couple’ pictures. I think I accidentally saw some pictures where he took with his ex. Not only that, underneath the pictures, there was a bundle of letters which I think they were love letters. And the main point was, he was away and I knew I could have just read them all.

At the end I didn’t, even if it’s with his permission, I still wouldn’t it. I know myself pretty well, I will definitely start thinking too much or imagining things when I know much about his ex (es). Even now from time to time, he does mention a bit of the ex (es), I still not interested I them. I would rather not know their existence at all. And I definitely don’t want t know how many were them.

Maybe I love him a lot, I still feel upset whenever he mentions them. Sometimes I wonder if he still misses them. It makes me wonder, when he is hugging me, does he know who’s in his arms? Everyone says you’ll have the one who you love the most in your entire life, am I the one or it’s one of the ex (es)? Ok, see, I am starting thinking too much already. Bad old habit of mine.

And one thing I want to praise my Baby for is on that day itself, he told me what’s in the box and he didn’t hide about those pictures. He showed me and briefly explained who she was and yes, she was one of the ex (es) but everyone has got a past so I’ll just let it be.

I am glad that I am not some nosy person, so I didn’t check out those stuff. And it wasn’t my intention to go through his stuff anyway. If I do it, I know I’m killing myself with his past. Curiosity kills the cats but not me.


- Get Your Own

Categories: relationship [t]

Well, they say trust is very important in a relationship.
» Nuttz on 2007-06-21 01:29:08

To Nuttz
I agree on it and that's why I didn't do it :p
» deecy on 2007-06-22 11:47:59

Good job Deecy, you are very good! It's also good that he explained them, that puts your worries to rest. You need to UPDATE MORE so I have something to read. :D
I totally know what you mean about the whole "exes" thing. I mean, I want him to be able to talk to me about *anything* and I don't want there to be all these emotions that he's going through that he feels like he can't discuss with me or that he feels like he has to hide from me... but at the same time... I don't actually want to hear anything about his exes. Ever. Good, bad, doesn't matter- don't want to hear it. So in the best case scenario he does feel comfortable telling me about what he thinks about... and he doesn't think about them. EVER! HAHAHA! I know that's totally unreasonable, but still.
» Zanzibar on 2007-07-08 06:57:36

To Zanzibar
Haha, finally found someone who can relate to what I felt about the 'exes'. Girls can be funny sometimes, you wanna know but yet you are afraid of what you're going to hear soon. Thanks for sharing your experience. Will definitely keep you updated! :)
» deecy on 2007-07-15 06:44:04

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