Ok, so my other nutang is like my outward self. The self that I want everyone to know, that I want everyone to read, So that I do not offend Mothers or Brothers or Sisters.
This one no one shall know of, I hope.
I will keep it specifically at work, Won't access it at home. won't even look at it at home.

Sound paranoid? Well I am a weird person.

I long very much to keep the fragile peace in my house. As much as I now realize how much I really resent my mother. I didn't listen to what everyone was telling me because I wanted so much for it to be untrue. But its not.
And thus this nutang/journal/blog/rant, To make me feel better.

I hope that I don't sound to whiny. I find it hard to put our arguments into words because it seems that even writing I still try and make it look like my fault, and you know honestly, some of it probably is. I in no way say that I am completely blameless in all the 'altercations' but you know, I'm not the only one there either.
So I hope you will be able to deal with me in everything I post. Because I am becoming a very bitter and mean person. I don't want to be that person. I don't want to be my mother. I don't want to be my Grandmother. If I don't get this out somewhere I will never get it out.
And I'm not ready to die yet.

Sincerly
Rhea. (not real name, my new persona so to speak.)

Well. Welcome to your new persona.
» AmbyrJayde on 2008-08-09 06:21:47

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